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The Obligatory Limericks Game
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When the Crescenters arrive at Rab...
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And I owe the whole thing to you
Colours don't mix with whites [Rosie] I'm going to be working nights come next month, so I anticipate doing some entire limericks myself...
And I'm working nights (sorry to hog two lines but frankly BM's line was too good to pass up)
But in darkness, you can't see the hue.
[Rosie: I seem to find myself doing a lot of first lines. Perhaps its all in the timing. Should we set up a kind of limerick tag-team?]
It's Monday again. What a pain!
Let's get naked and dance in the rain!
But there's work to be done!
And that man's got a gun!
Still, better than being David Blaine.
There's a rumour down St. Austell way
That the vicar's an awfully good lay
The rev's a woman, you see
So let's, after tea
Get down on our knees and then prey. yes, I can spell ...
As God said to me yesterday
'It's a shame that mans' feet are of clay,'
"But women's are wood"
"which isn't much good"leaving an opening for a grand finale....
When rolling around in the hay.... that was pantsy wasnt it?... onwards and downwards...
The voices I hear in my head
Say, "Kill them all, make them all dead!"
So keep out of my way
If you're planning to stay
Alive, and not copiously bled.
Beware! There's a beast on the loose
It's already beheaded a moose
It's got massive claws
And three sets of jaws
All SNARLY like big men called Bruce.
apologies to any non-snarling mild-mannered Bruces out there
I wish to object very strongly
For being treated so wrongly (I know, I know!)
You cad, oh, you fiend
I feel so demeaned
And you have made my face grow long-ly
And now I shall sue you for slander! [invoking more fiendish rhymes]
For you called me 'a cad and a bahnder'
But wives make good secs topicality invoked
And they come with free specs [doubling entendre]
And they all call their husbands, "Commander" That was a bizarre swerve, Projoy!
Darren - didn't you realise that IDS's given name is Longfaced Bruce?
Evidently not.
There's a lot of <HR> tags above!
Yeah. 'Fess up.
But still, it is you that I love!
ahem..
There's a lot of HR tags above!
But still, it is you that I love!
May I be so <bold>
Ahem...
May I be so <bold%gt;
You're simply too old (I thought I'd get a few in the bank back there.)
And you're ugly, when push comes to shove. [Darren] Well, I was recalling that IDS had threatened to sue anyone who impugned his character over the matter of his sec's life.
I'd risk all the world for your smile
As you smile in a very strange style
Your teeth are perfection
Despite the infection
which makes your gums shrink back a mile
Your feet are the colour of sin
So let's just pop them back in the bin
Your hands, I shall chop
To sell in my shop
With a pie with your entrails in
That last name made the homepage all wide and ugly. This is not the start of a limerick.
This is:
The homepage is ugly and wide
And all rotten and stinky inside
We have rab to thank
for the stink that it stank
- He caused it, though much he denied!
A magician, on doing a stunt,
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