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The Obligatory Limericks Game
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When the Crescenters arrive at Rab...
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As they squat in the cats litter tray
If you catch a whiff of ammonia,
You should travel at once to Livonia
Eùmist kõrd mierdõ (Carpe Diem invoked)
You've pissed up me 'airdo Er . . .Will this do?
And now I've got double pneumonia ... best I could do - given the bizarre switch to 'first person'.
I don't mind the getting up early
When the dawn is tendrilled and pearly
But what I can't stand
Is the touch of your hand
That's caressing my Curly Wurly
I once was attacked by a squirrel
Whilst using an epidural only 2 rhymes left, unless someone uses their imagination..
Which I had received
in my dire hour of need (snorgle) Where's Birkenhead?
from a backstreet old quack, name of CyrilScouse avoidance invoked
To make a relationship work
IDS must convince us he's sane - uphill struggle in Blackpool
Bugger, simulpost, Hi Chalks, BTW
One must not act up like a jerk - going with Chalks, on this one.
To make a relationship work
One must not act up as a jerk
By groping those bits
That the hand nicely fits
you'll drive any female berserk. (Uncle K) Birkenhead - Wirral, squirrel. :-)
A microwave oven will cook
An elk, a badger, or rook
But if you try bison .. oh dear - more animal cruelty. See Orange - NB. not for the squeamish
or even Mike Tyson
It could get quite ugly - don't look!
The loveliest boy in the school
Is usually gay, as a rule Squirrel and Wirral don't rhyme to me!
You can tell by his satchel
He hangs out with Tatchell (thanks for the feed, Chalky)
He's as gay as a damsel Oh, dear, Chalks, another duff rhyming word
Bugger simulpost
At Eton, being camp is thought cool might as well get this over with.
Never mind, Softers. Rest assured, I would never post anything that didn't have a rhyme - but in this case, there was really only the one which rab picked up. Now for linesperson duty ...
When simulposted, I just stare
At a line which ain't meant to be there
My brilliance is wasted!
My genius untasted!
And my fine words are all rendered spare.
While studying a map of Belgrade
On my yacht (for I'm rather well paid)
There's a gaping big hole
the size of a goal
at the place where explosives are made.
There once was a house on a hill
Just Checked, it's up there still
Oh dear. It's turned Tartan
And I'd so set my heart on (unfinished sentence alert)
Grey pinstripes made out of fine twill. ... It seemed lonely sitting here for days without a finale.
Well there I was, wondering if anyone would bother finishing it off and up you pop ... with, if I may say, a very elegant last line. Bravo.
I went to the tailor's this morning
(Quite early - just as the day's dawning)
"Which way do you dress?" [well done, Duj]
, he enquired. In distress,
"With just simply the suit I was born in."
It's high time you told me the truth
without being rude and uncouth
"well, its like this"
"I want you to kiss"
And to what she said next I said "STREWTH!"
My sins now I wish to confess
I admit I like wearing a dress
But so what? I'm a girl
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Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord