arrow_circle_left arrow_circle_up arrow_circle_right
The Obligatory Limericks Game
help
When the Crescenters arrive at Rab...
arrow_circle_up
If the good guys always end up losing.
"Go away", I explode in my fury
Going nuclear like old Marie Curie
and do not come back
'Til you've found me that hack
That knobbled the judge and the jury.
"Stand back! It's a rabid mince pie!"
"One scratch from its fangs and you'll die!"
Though it's crust looks quite tasty
My decision was hasty
And now up in heaven I sigh. .. hmm .. bit wobbly on the tenses, that one.
Impartial advice is quite rare
And even then, to be fair
I seldom take heed
Carpe Diem's my creed
I just do what I want with my hair
Eating beans and fly fishing with Hartley
At a village in Wiltshire called Startley
I caused quite a stir
'cos I mimicked the burr
So the trout leapt and slapped my face smartly.
PLastic surg'ry to lengthen my spine
They said silicone implants were fine
But my facelift went "phutt"
Any now looks like my butt
Any --> And
Which is great! So I've no need to whine.
[SW] Do we really need all these hyperlinks?
Chalky - Buff up your German and write
'My German is shiny and bright!' - That's what you meant, isn't it, Chalky?
Then give him a roast
After that, you can boast: unfini...
'It's bangers and mash nächster zeit'
'My Bach is müch worse than my bite'. [alternative and much better ending - serves me right for getting distracted by that minx penelope when we're supposed to be hard at work. Anyway - apologies for hogging the game - over to you lot ...
A present is under the tree
I really hope it's for me
It's a very strange shape
and all are agape (Chalky) But is it verse zen your Cherman Bight?
So I'll open it and we will all see.
"..and so, in summation", he said,
"As thrilled as I am with this... head,"
"The other missing bits..."
(toes, teeth and tits)
"Will shortly mean I'll end up dead."
In a fight with the monster King Kong,
I realised something was wrong
For a start, he was tiny
and his nose it was shiny
And he emitted a terrible pong!
While paying for something by Visa
I was heckled by old Ebenezer
"Bah, humbug!" he cried
"I don't care who's died, This quote left deliberately open
cos I am a grumpy old geezer!" - this quote deliberately closed :D
I can't see the wood for the trees
And I can't see the pod for the peas
or the grass for the blades
Or my feet for the shades
I've got an oc-u-lar disease!
Prepare for the onslaught, my friend!
With pistols at dawn, make amend!
The revolution is here
Our aim? It's not clear
Oh just how will it all end.
With a bang, not a whimper, I fear!
That's how Iraq will end the old year
But not every place
With a US army base
will necessarily cheer.
And so, Merry Christmas to all!
arrow_circle_down
Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord