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The Obligatory Limericks Game
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When the Crescenters arrive at Rab...
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Why did it come out with all those spaces, but not this time?
Then I’ll kick your ass, said Cheshire cat [Rosie] No wonder then that I thought the fading scent from your lines was more like ‘Axe Marine', but my smelling sense is not so good any more.....
John Howard will never be gone!
"He goes on and on". (Anon) (Marc) Yerssss. I do wash y'know. :-)
So here's what I think:
We could all use a drink - though this is probably true at any time and not just 'cos of the Aussie elections :)
To celebrate (down-under) erection’s withdrawn?
My butler is off for tonight, (sorry all, of course I meant election !)
And he's left the house looking a fright Of course you did Marc :)
Because it is haunted
By spooks I'll be taunted
But I'm Dracula so off for a bite
"Do you have to go, Laura?" I said
"I thought you'd like Dawn of the Dead"
"They look just like you."
"Have not got a clue,"
"How do you get a girl into bed?"
She will get into bed when she's ready
With curlers and mudpack and teddy
Phooar, sexy mudpacks! Mmm!
Her nightgown is woolly
And covers her fully sorry, couldn't resist
Cor blimey! This outfit is heady! Haaang on...are we talking Teddy as in skimpy diaphanous-yet-wooly garment held together with "strategically placed snap fastenings" (hurhurhur) or were you thinking more along the lines of a clockwork Ursus Somnolus that sings "Walzing Matilda"?
There once was a dimwitted poet,
A Crescenter. Wouldn't you know it?
The name - I'll reveal
His ineptitude Stress shift required.
BUGGER! Didn't see you there, Darren. I'll have another go.
Not David Baddiel? Tiresome git. This is my actual contribution, BTW.
But ------- BLUE PENCIL -------
Sorry can't allow that to be seem
So who let that censor in here?
There once were two dimwitted poets,
Who kept as pets boy and girl stoats "Poets"? Come on...
Their loud copulation (Puckoon) Who's the censor? You, matey, to judge by the message timing. If you can't think of a line then just sit this one out.
Was justification
For helping them on with their coats Needs a Lincolnshire accent for this one to rhyme, but it does work, honest. 'Coats' is 'Coo-arts', 'stoats' 'stoo-arts etc etc.

A return to more RP reciting
Does one not think these vowels sound inviting? Kudos to Darren for that nifty line 4
For rain falls in Spain
Ignore Michael Caine (Pen) That sounds more like Hartlepool to me, where the word "no" is two syllables, prounced "Noah" or "gnawer". Maybe it's an east-of-England thing.
Cause he’s more for free fiction writing.
Alas poor Yorick, my head I have lost,
Alas
It is mouldering in the compost
Its vacuous grin God, this is gruesome.
And this dastardly sin
Will be solvèd by Inspector Frost.
My thumb's fallen into my soup
Said Scoutmaster Bill, to his troop
"Don't shout too loud!"
Was the will of the crowd
"You'll get it back once you go poop."I have been silent too long. Just intervening to say I've been laughing along wit you [arteests] for some tyme now. *chuckle* Now carry on! [slinking back into the shadows] don't be alarmed by me raucous laughter.
The election's a fortnight away
And our nerves are beginning to fray
Now this time peace will win ...winning scansion forever!
'Cause Kerry's long chin
Will start charming people any day
Now
"Wear shiny plastic on your skin" gruntgrunt
And try to imagine you're thin good memory required
The semi-transparent
... just almost apparent ...
It looks like you're just wearing a grin.
The Cheshire Cat smiled and spoke thus:
"Because I just fade, there's a fuss"
"People wonder and stare"
''When I'm only part there''
"And that's why I'm wearing this truss."
For five hundred years I had thought
that happiness could always be bought (Projoy) the secret of your longevity being.....?
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