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The Obligatory Limericks Game
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When the Crescenters arrive at Rab...
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On the plus side: look, Friday is near!
with a full weekend ahead
And black silk-sheets in my bed
Soon we'll put ourselves in first gear!
One Friday (quite soon) I think that I will
On leaving work, put my hand in the till
To finance my fun
While I go on the run
I'll never get caught if I bung the Old Bill!
Two days free, so what shall I do?
Visit Blackpool, or far Timbuktu?
Alas, I am skint
Please give me a hint
How rude! And the same to you too!
Foucault's Nietzschean Historiography
Is a bloddy good read when you're lonely
But for those who have friends
Well, we know how it ends
- in a maze of verbose sub-pornography
But Durkheim, of course, is much clearer
In claiming that orgasm's comes nearer (sorry, my French isn't that good, maybe he meant organs?)
Using specialist aids
And a system of grades
that suited that buttonned-up era.
My Grandfathers clock has got tics
Which explains his success rate with chlicks (cloat.ha ha)
It also has fleas
And arthritic knees
But its name is Captain Hicks.
The trouble with women in cars ,Not going anywhere you understand
Is really they’re driving like stars Alternative ending of last one: The reason it strike and not kicks!
In Venus-like fashion
A shame they keep crashin' tortuous final syllable pronunciation required
Into men driving back from their bars
She was finding it hard to deny it
'Cos she knew that her drivin' was shy-it
So she let actions speak
And drove up the creek
and flooded the engine and had to walk-it!
There once was a lim’rick molester,
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