The trouble is some MC's patrol the scansion and the rhyme so closeley that you would think that when it comes to Limericks that they were God. 'nuf said.
[merely a comment - I cannot do line 5] (plump) That's uncanny! I put up the same first line about 2 yrs ago in MCPants and the 2nd line was "who cut off his bollocks and ate 'em". Was that you? An even more shameless recycling than mine, and, ahem, it scans a bit better. :-)
So fuck off good scansion – you know what I mean?>[Rosie: Why destroying an almost finished limerick just to try teaching us common amateur poets something that you don’t respect yourself? Very bad manner in my humble opinion]
I would just like to point out that the line above, to whit: "I'm an asshole and need a good spank" was not written by me and I would kindly ask whoever it was to not do that again. Whilst walking the streets late at night
A pygmy chihuahua - [snodgrass] It would appear now that you are actually coming out with it and saying you think I am an asshole ? This is not really in keeping with the etiquette of this forum, and if you really took exception to my limerick line that seemed to have sparked the comment I would say you have a singular lack of humour. Also I would say "fuck you" but I won't, because that would not be in keeping with the etiquette of this forum. Watch your mouth.
Barking like a (mad) cacadua [st dog] Maybe you are not a real asshole but you certainly acted like one entering that lunatic 'phone'-line. Go wash your mouth!
The forum police must give chase [St Dog] You misread my comment. It was the handle-napper who I was referring to as being deserving of the attribution of the term 'asshole'. They had made the comment disguising themselves with your handle but inferring the monika to themselves. I'm sorry if you took offence but you really didnt need to.
(Well, I hope so, for that's my intent)snodgrass] well in that case I am very glad I didn't say "fuck you". Sorry for the confusion but it wasn't clear and seemed mightily unprovoked......ho humYou're an asshole and so is your horse
This we’ve heard from the mouth of the whores assuming 'You're an asshole and so is your horse' is the line to be rhymed in best possible scansion mode....? Or if you like, replace it with: As was writ on the door to the loo....
This one has lost its thread a little I fear. Yes the second one didn't really scan too well. Crivvens. What to do ? Lets start it again with a completely new lineMy horsey's upset and offended
A deep pit I have got (the child had just jumped into his garden you see, and had landed in a large pit that the man had dug. It loses something in the explanation I think.)
Now I'm afraid that your corpse I must flense Because once in the pit this maniac has dug in his garden, stunned from the unexpected drop and helpless to ward of the mad neighbour's intentions, the child gets subjected to a "Silence of the Lambs" moment, dies a horrible death and becomes an Item of secret fetish-wear. You're right, it does lose something, doesn't it?Kidnapped, drugged then dropped in my pit
Far more than his musical scores ever can. Don't look at me! The scansion was f*cked anyway ... :-) :-) :-)Chalky - Today I shall swear with rude words
And drinking on Sunday's I'm toldThe Welsh are a frivolous lot - let's try that last idea out in a way that can actually be rhymed without recourse to the Star Trek Klingon Dictionary™
welsh sea snot] I take it that you guys just stumbled upon that one ? Or have you perhaps tried Lava Bread ? para 7. Its basically seaweed/algae or similar and they mix it with oatmeal and make little cakes with it fried for breakfast. Marvellous stuff, though in it's pre oat added form it looks like a big pile of darkish green MUCAS.
Then I’ll kick your ass, said Cheshire cat [Rosie] No wonder then that I thought the fading scent from your lines was more like ‘Axe Marine', but my smelling sense is not so good any more.....
Cor blimey! This outfit is heady! Haaang on...are we talking Teddy as in skimpy diaphanous-yet-wooly garment held together with "strategically placed snap fastenings" (hurhurhur) or were you thinking more along the lines of a clockwork Ursus Somnolus that sings "Walzing Matilda"?
For helping them on with their coatsNeeds a Lincolnshire accent for this one to rhyme, but it does work, honest. 'Coats' is 'Coo-arts', 'stoats' 'stoo-arts etc etc. A return to more RP reciting
Ignore Michael Caine(Pen) That sounds more like Hartlepool to me, where the word "no" is two syllables, prounced "Noah" or "gnawer". Maybe it's an east-of-England thing.
"You'll get it back once you go poop."I have been silent too long. Just intervening to say I've been laughing along wit you [arteests] for some tyme now. *chuckle* Now carry on! [slinking back into the shadows] don't be alarmed by me raucous laughter.
Remember, when out in the rain / "I'll say it to you, straight and plain" No idea what happens next. Maybe this is just an advert for The Furcation Game. We'll see.
It's only four years (Though imagine if Bush got assassinated - Cheney would get the rest of his term, then undoubtedly be elected for a new one, and could stand for yet another at the end...)
I would call it brunette, but I canna.Yeah, yer annoying wee gingernut.... [Projoy] so you had nothing better to do on Sunday afternoon than watch crappy films too?
The maids were not found (not aimed at anyone in particular, but players unsure of the best rhythm for a limerick might find this useful. (Rhymes are, luckily, more intuitive).
so as not to get court unawares [Marc] Of cause they don't, don't be silly, they do there best hunting in the dark, how else can they creep up on the Penguins?
Oscar Wilde was a very great wit, but others just think he was shit, some like him a bit, some call him a hit, and others would cover him with grit. Showing off I know but what the heck...