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The Obligatory Limericks Game
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When the Crescenters arrive at Rab...
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"It'll bug out your eyes"
But I sensed that he'd had quite enough.
While cruising to tropical climes
To escape prosecution for crimes
I happened to meet
A cop on the beat
Who said "Sunshine, you're nicked, you'll do time!"
My cell is just six feet by ten
And I share it with 26 men
My left knee is wedged
between something alleged unf...
(sorry! for grammar:) behind something alleged
to be bigger than that owned by Sven.
If sleep were a treat, not a right,
I think I'd still do it all night
I'd stay in my pit
Until I saw fit
To get up [or just needed a shite] thangyew thangyew
I wish I did not oversleep
But when my alarm clock goes "beep"
The temptation's too great
And I must masturbate
Because I've been counting those sheep.
Of all of the people I've met,
None compares to that nice Yorkshire vet
for creatures, he's best great and small, that is
But dont shake his hand, lest FG] I almost ruptured my throat laughing at that !
Yours ends up all slimy and wet... eeeeewwww.....
One Saturday in Piccadilly
I met a transvestite called Lily bit of a drag, though
She took me in hand
(Plus a minor brass band)
And then we... no, that would be silly
One night, while traversing Kings Cross,
Like a Rolling Stone gathering moss [invoking st dogmael]
A complete unknown
playing trombone
Said, 'Quite frankly I don't give a toss'
I think I've drunk too much 'Red Bull'
So my bladder is buzzing and full [FG] I've got the most *awful* image in my mind of someone OD-ing on RB...
My 'water' is pink
And it's starting to stink
I don't think I'm going to pull.
I'm morose, really down in the dumps
'Cos my willy has come out in lumps maintaining the base level
He is such a good dog Straining to get out of the mire....
He sits on the bog
But when he gets to the sink, he just humps
Sinatra was once heard to say
I'm proud that I did things my way
Though I cheated and cussed
Was my hair ever mussed? Have I missed an obvious song-led rhyme here?
and the Mafia augmented my pay
Bruce Forsythe enjoyed a good game [penelope] Not that I made intentionally, no :)
'Though his wig received all the acclaim
It did a small jig
Then grew very big
Now it's taken the star role in 'Mame'
My friend is called Pudsey the Bear (topical)
We go round to children in care
And give them a thrashing Children in Need? Why can't they stay in bloody need? That's not me talking btw - it's a quote from the Fast Show...
With feathers, not bashing ... Which sounds a little like the sentences imposed on murderers, rapists etc. meted out by my local judiciary system.... (tucks occasional right wing tendencies over tender left wing and flies off.)
It's a smash when it goes out on air! Or the S4C primetime highlight: "Children In Neath"
I'm a big fan of Children in Neath
And of Ladyboys in Cowdenbeath
The Teenagers in Frome
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Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord