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50 Ways To....
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This was Kevan's idea (see MCiOS chat room). It's based on the song "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover" ("You just slip out the back, Jack; Make a new plan, Stan....") Well, there have to be 50 ways to do other tasks, right? So, off we jolly well go, Joe!
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2. Keep knocking back the sherry, Cherie.
3. Donate organs before you're dead, Fred. Two sides to every story
3. Take all possible steps to avoid a carcinoma, Homer. And yet a third.
4 Don't forget the rum, mum.
5. When you're eating liver and bacon, keep the bacon but throw away what remains, Brains.
7. Behave like George Best, Celeste.
8. Put away a skinful of Theakston's Old Peculier, Julia.
Share a needle wih a junkie, Monkey.
10. Drink yourself under the table, Mabel.
[When mom ain't lookin'] sneak it under the table to Ol' Rover, Grover.
The last one was [it was]!
12. Drink a flagon of scumpy with every meal, Neil.
13. Promise a loan shark a pound of your mortal flesh, Ramesh.
14. Don't keep loads of booze in the house, Klaus.
15. If you're the city the Beatles came from, change your name to "pool," Zool.
16. A bottle of whiskey a day, Ray.
17. Drink a bottle of whisky a day, Jay. Far more potent!
18 Juggle with a chainsaw, Tor.
19 Drink dodgy foreign water, daughter.
20. Impale thyself on a meat hook, ye crook.
21. Take a midnight stroll with Jack The Ripper, Gipper.
22. Sign your organ donor card, M'Lord.
[i'm finished now!]
23. Try to avoid hepatitis, Titus.
24. Stay off the Vitamin A, Kay.
25. Sell it on Ebay, Jay.
Take to many headache pills, Will's
Have a meal with Hannibal Lecter, Hector!
28 - Turn your back on Jeffrey Dahmer, Homer.
29 - Catch the Whooping Cough, Dolph!
30 - Ship it to the wrong address, Bess!
Don't date Lector, Hector.
above = 31
32. - Kiss someone with halitosis, Miss Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
33 Feed it to the cat, Matt
Eat it with Phal, darl. or should that be Dahl?
35 Cover it with too much gravy or veg, Reg.
36.If you don't already know, then I ain't telling you, Lou.
37 Leave it on the Bus, Gus
38 Have it gently fried, Clyde
Let it fill with pus, Russ
40 - Attempt the forbidden [Pole Vaulting Position], #1069 in The Daredevil's Guide To Kama Sutra, Lutra.
Have it as a kebab, Rab!
Sign up as a donor, Mona.
Forty one is a prime number, so that was
42!
Drink a drum of rum, son
Have dodgy LFT's, louise
Have Jaundice, Morris!
45 - Sell it to the highest bidder, Kidder [OOPS!].
46 - Your ailing Uncle is a boss in the Mob, Bob.
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