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50 Ways To....
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This was Kevan's idea (see MCiOS chat room). It's based on the song "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover" ("You just slip out the back, Jack; Make a new plan, Stan....") Well, there have to be 50 ways to do other tasks, right? So, off we jolly well go, Joe!
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48. Nasty does of chlamydia, Lydia.
49.Tell 'em you're just too damn lazy to come in today, Maisy.
50. Be honest and tell 'em you've been out on the piss, Chris.
I think it must be time for 50 Ways To Play Mornington Crescent, starting with
1. Start at Green Park, Clark.
2. Avoid Dollis Hill, Will
3. Perform several striles, Niles.
4. Avoid Dollis Hill, Phil.
5. Avoid Dollis Hill, Jill.
6 Jump straight to Morden, Denis Norden.
7. Avoid Dollis Hill, Bill
8. Use Ongar Denials, Gyles.
9.Keep one foot on the Bank, Frank.
10. Keep an eye on the L.V., Bea.
11. Don't land in knip, Pip
12. Be sparing in invoking Archbold's Lemma, Gemma.
13. Ignore all the rules, fools.
14.You simply must ad lib, Mr. Gibb.
15. Play Waterloo, Stu
16 Via Picadilly, Lilly
17. And thence to Kingsway, May.
18. Don't end up in spoon, June.
Watch out for the LV spike, errr, Spike.
19.00
20. Declare home at Goodge Street, Pete. Well it works for me!
21. Don't even think of gatecrashing one of our games and killing it off by playing Mornington Crescent, peasant.
*shouts, screams, generally goes wild for Wol*
Oh buggerbuggerbugger - there's a horrid bullet wound in my foot ... sorrysorrysorry - help!! I really didn't mean that to happen, honest ...
22. Slink back to Queensway, Fay.
23. Straddle Putney Bridge, Midge.
24. Beware of roads that go one-way, Jay
25. Fetch the Game Repair Squad when Wol f*cks up, Fairlop. [teehee]
26. Do it with feeling, North Ealing
27. Crossharbour and London Arena, Tina
28. Keep the diagonals clear, Pier.
Make a joke about Mudchute, Knute.
^ 29
30 With interesting nicknames, James.
31. Keep changing your moniker, Monica.
32. Watch out for Becontree, Dee.
33. I'll start at Vauxhall, Paul.
34. Only *farkle* when stuck, Chuck.
35. Never pin Colindale, Colin, Dale.
36. Don't try to get off at Museum, Liam!
37. Be wary of Tooting Bec, Beck.
38. Have care in Zone One, Juan.
39.Thru interesting pick-up lines in bars, Lars.
40: Check your Fronsky diagram, Pam.
[Falstaff] Just FYI, such manoeuvres have been illegal since the 1997 Ljubljana Amendments.
41 Go right on past Old Street, Pete
42. Start a Parks Cascade, Jade.
43. Try not to bifurcate, Kate
44. Don't straddle over White City, Kitty.
45. Don't make the Kings Cross, Boss.
46. Don't start a Dollis Hill Loop, Troop.
47 Don't cause a reverse temporal eddy, Sir Neddie. [Neddie] Nice to have such an esteemed knight of the realm with us, but please note that the gigni de nihilo ... game on MCiOS flows in reverse -- ie, if you read up the page it makes sense, so you can't "know" what's gone before as it hasn't happened yet in the game's time frame -- the fun lies in the construction of a "past" that fits everything we know will be "going to happen". I think I've managed to make your first move fit in all right, though ... ([everyone] Sorry; I promise this is the last time I interrupt an mc5 game to explain gigni.)
48. Try to bifurcate, Kate.
Of course, it depends on the circumastances, as you all know. 43's still valid, just spotted that!
[Brendan] You can't believe how long it took me to figure that it was backwards...
49. Avoid trouble by playing Hyde Park, Mark
50. Don't forget to finish the match, Patch.

OK, now how about 50 Ways to Appear on Television.

1. Steak at a sporting event, Brent.

dammit, meant streak
2. Eat an enormous steak, Drake. For charity or something. Nice one Darren!
3. Elbow your way vigorously to the front of the 'Last Night of the Prom'ers, Thomas.
Write a TV comedy play....Ray
4. Bare your breast to the planet, Janet.
Ah, not very original; it appears that ZK did something similar earlier. I should have clicked on 'Expose All'. Sorry.
Aargh! That should have been 5.
6. Write in to Blue Peter, Dieter.
7. Become a celebrity cook, Chuck. From north of 52½°N, obviously.
8. Write to Laurence Llewellyn-Bowen, Rowan.
9 Go on Who wants to be a Millionaire, Clare
Get eaten by a lion at Longleat, Pete
Pah I forgot the number again.......back to Kings Cross sorry everyone!!
Start a riot at the footie, Sooty. [Dujon] Yours was funnier :)
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Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord