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50 Ways To....
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This was Kevan's idea (see MCiOS chat room). It's based on the song "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover" ("You just slip out the back, Jack; Make a new plan, Stan....") Well, there have to be 50 ways to do other tasks, right? So, off we jolly well go, Joe!
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29. Flash your tit, Janet.
30.Try to crash a rave, Dave.
[Snodgrass - ooh topical!]
31. Eat all your housemates stew, Lou.
32 Step on someones toe, Joe [Snorgle - How kind of you to notice]
33. Qu'ils mangent de la brioche, Josh.
34. Allow a blatantly offside goal, Joel. (Kim) Class!
35. Raise income tax by a pony, Tony.
36. Adopt a bold font for your stance, Lance.
37. Over-use Bad HTML, Mel.
38. Torch a few cars, Lars [Kim] Very nice...
39 Throw a molotov cocktail, Abigail.
40. Hit a PC with a brick, Rick.
42. Start the looting, Putin
43. Keep disputin', Rasputin.
44. Drop a bomb anywhere in Asia, Anastasia.
45 Kill a kid, Sid
46. Assassinate the Crown Prince, Vince.
47. Introduce the Poll Tax, Maggs.
48. Issue a primal scream, Dean.
49. Insert an extra fourteen syllables into a certain metrical reading at a poetry recital full of pedants, Lance.
50. Insert a horizontal line in the wrong place, Ace.

How about [for you travel lovers] ...
50 Ways To Circumnavigate The Earth

1. Traverse the Amazon Basin, Jason.
2 Head up the Nile, Kyle
Take a jet plane, Jane
4. Climb on a Penny-farthing, Martin
3. Hop on the ferry, Kerry
ugh. sorry, should have been 5. It's been a long week.....
6 Just use your own feet, Reet
7. Go up in a balloon, June.
8.Mail yourself to Timbuktu, Pru.
9 Go with someone from Monty Python, Typhon.
10. Summon Sir Francis Drake, Jake.
11. Just hop on a bus, Gus ... Wait, that sounds familiar...
12. Assume a low earth orbit in a pod, Rod
13. Get pedalling on your bike, Mike.
14. Catch the express, Jess.
15. Try feathers and wax, Max.
16. Sail on the Kontiki, Mickey.
17. Take an airship, Chip.
18. Strap yourself to a rocket, Crockett.
19. Ride the salt wave, Dave.
Fly through the sky, Guy
Or take a ship, Pip
22. Paddle your own canoe, Sue.
23. Cross the Serengeti, Betty.
24. Walk beside the Panama Canal, Ranulph.
26. Start by jogging down the parade, Sinead.
26. Pretend it's a marathon, Jonathan.
27. Sail off in a yacht, Dot.
28. Take three steps round the pole, Cole.
Try a hand glide,Clyde
30: Don't forget your passport, Mort!
31. Tunnel to Albuquerque, Bugs.
32. Get off your arse and hike, Spike!
33.Just keep walking straight, Kate...
34. ...Till you're back where you start, Art
35. Recharge that Sinclair C5, Clive.
36. Get your Mum to row, Bo.
37. Start by swimming the Atlantic, Nick.
38; Half Pipe a Skateboard, Claude
39 On a unicycle, Michael.
40. Chuck yourself from a trebuchet, Jay.
41. Have a lift from a sedan chair, Clare
42. Hop on a jet, Bette.
Go around in a rocket, Charlie!
43!!
44.Get kicked by a cow, How!
45. With a documentary film crew trailin', Michael Palin.
46. On a slow boat to China, Carolina.
47. Charter the QE2, Lou
48. Develop a fully functional Matter Transportation Device to convert you into sub-atomic particles and bounce yourself off of a satellite, Dwight
49. In a Kayak, Jack
50. Get away and wait for the world to spin, Min.
Well, this game's going at a fair old lick, come the time and we need a new one. Erm...
*channeling the collective consciousness of the e-pilg*

50 Ways to call in sick

1 Tell 'em you've got a frog in your throat, Googolplex the Amazing Balancing Goat.
2. Tell them your nose is the size of a melon, Helen.
3. Say you're suffering from sciatica, Attica.
4. Or just say you've got the flu, Sue, or pulled a muscle, Russell.
5. I've had a family loss, boss.
6. I'm clinicaly dead, Fred
7. I'm just a bit ill, Bill.
8I think I'm positively insane, Jermaine
Say you're under the weather, Heather.
which was 9 of course D'OH!
10 Get a nasty bout of diarrhoea, Maria.
11 You've amputated a limb, Jim
12 Say you've consumed a bottle of Lemony Cif, Cliff
13 You simply can't be arsed to come in, Tim.
14 Got a touch of gangrene, Dean.
15. Remove your appendix, Felix. *dodgy rhyme alert*
16. Just tell 'em they smell, Mel.
17. Say you've got a verruca, Luca.
18. Say you've caught leprosy, Dee. But don't worry, the doctor says it's going round tight now and I'll be over it by the end of the week.
19. Say you've been sick, Dick.
20. Say that the boil has burst, Kirst.
21.Tell 'em you've got a splinter, Araminta.
22. Best use the 'phone, Joan.
23. ... but email if you've got laryngitis, Otis.
24.Say *cough* you think you've *cough* got SARS, Lars. *cough* *cough*
25. Claim to be hit by a van, Stan
26. Tell the silly moo you Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease, Denise
27. Admit to the hangover, Clover.
28. Say your Gran died, Clyde.
29. Call to say you've been out late with Jordan, Gordon. they'll understand, oh yes
30. You have gastroenteritis, Titus.
31. You accidentally cut your own head off while trying to shave, Dave.
32. You ate the wrong kind of berry, Terry.
Fake Typhoid, Boyd.
34.Read them your obituary, Jerry.
Tell em you choked on some Candy, Mandy
36. Just tell 'em you're crook, sook.
37.Get your dear Mother to call in for you, Lou.
38. Say you've tachycardia, Nadia.
39. Feign asbestosis, Moses.
40 Deny being in Las Vegas, Gus
[all] shurely 'Deny being in Las Vegas, Dégas'...?!!
[pen]you tell who you want to tell, I'm telling Gus
41.... send 'em a singing telegram, Sam
42. The doc says you have thrush, Nush.
43. Tell 'em to look up 'cause I'm in freefall, all and no parachute!
44 Say you were crushed by a freefalling lunatic, Rick
45 Say you've dislocated your shoulder, Golda. (Duj) 38 is v. good. :-)
46. Say you're trapped in a lift, Cliff.
47. You've just had ECT, Jeeves.
48. Nasty does of chlamydia, Lydia.
49.Tell 'em you're just too damn lazy to come in today, Maisy.
50. Be honest and tell 'em you've been out on the piss, Chris.
I think it must be time for 50 Ways To Play Mornington Crescent, starting with
1. Start at Green Park, Clark.
2. Avoid Dollis Hill, Will
3. Perform several striles, Niles.
4. Avoid Dollis Hill, Phil.
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Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord