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Good News / Bad News
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Right, another chance to alternately build our spirits up and then disappoint them. I can't be bothered to change the winning move so it's still Mornington Crescent.
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Good News
If it draws enough, Peter Jackson will get to film The Hobbit.
Bad News
Michael Jackson already has. Allegedly.
Good News
Michael Jackson has a lot of 'Allegedlys' pending right now. Maybe one or two of them will stick and we won't be subjected to any more of his t*ss.
Bad News
Not until after his UK visit though.
Good News
He couldn't do anything questionable on Christmas....
Bad News
In the US legal system, you can get aay with murger if you are rich and prominent enough, as it seems.
Good News
"Murger" is the offence of owning a horse and carriage while having less than three barrels of tobacco to one's name.
Bad News
Three barrely of tobacco are unaffordable - unless you buy them in France.
Good News
I don't smoke.
Bad News
At least I didn't until I caught my sleeve in a passing campfire
Good News
Fortunately the Fire brigade were quick in their response.
Bad News
The Imperial Leather adverts don't work in real life.
good news
There are plenty more soaps on the TV.
Bad News
But they don't work either - or if they do, you'll end up with an unsightly rash.
Good news
Sudocrem is good for rashes and babies!
Bad News
Its not a good substitute for whipped cream.
Good News
Nothing like a good whipping.
Bad News
They eat whippets in Korea.
Good News
Whippets are down due to a new, non-high-forming gas they're putting in the cream containers.
Bad News
If you re arrange the letters in Korea you get an orange drink that brings me out in boils!
Good News
At least they're better than the bubos I had last week
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