Underneath the ****ing ****nut tree,
I ****ed her, and she ****ed me.
There she used to **** upon my ****,
Neath the ****ing ****nut tree.

Underneath the ****ing ****nut tree,
There she said she'd **** me.
Now, you ought to **** our family
Neath the ****ing ****nut tree!

Daisy, Daisy, give me your ****, do.
I'm half crazy all for the **** of you.
It won't be a stylish ****.
I can't afford **** ****.
But you'd look sweet upon the ****
Of a **** ***** **** two.

My **** lies over the ****
My **** lies over the ****
My **** lies over the ****
Oh **** **** my **** to me, to me!
**** ****, **** ****, oh **** **** my **** to me!

**** Roasting on an open fire
**** **** nipping at your ****
**** **** being **** by a choir
And folk **** **** **** Eskimoes
Everybody knows, a **** and some ****, help to **** the **** bright
**** **** with their eyes all aglow, will find it **** to **** tonight

Summertime, and the *****ing is *****,
Fish are ********,
And the *******is high,
Your daddy's *******, and your Momma's ****** ******ing
So ****** little *******, don't you *****

One of these fine mornings, I'm gonna wake up ********,
I'm gonna ******** my *******, and ****** *** *** ******
Until that fine morning, **********'s gonna ******* me
With Mommy and Daddy ********** ***.

When I **** up, yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the **** who ****s up next to you
When I **** out, yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the **** who ****s along with you
If I get ****, yes I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the **** who gets **** next to you
And if I ****, yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the **** who's ****ing to you.

But I would **** 500 ****s
And I would **** 500 more
Just to be the **** who ****ed a 1000 ****
To **** down at your ****.

I wanna ****, I want to ****
I wanna tear down the ****s
That **** me inside.
I wanna reach out
And touch the ****
Where the ****s have no ****.

I wanna feel **** on my ****.
I see the ****-**** disappear
Without a ****.
I wanna **** ****
From the poison ****
Where the ****s have no ****

Don't you **** her madly, don't **** her badly,
Don't you **** her ways, tell me what you ***.
Don't you **** her madly, wanna **** her daddy,
Don't you **** her ways.
Don't you **** her as she's walking out the door.
Like she did one thousand ***** before.
Don't you **** her ways, tell me what you ***.
Don't you **** her as she's walking out the door.

I **** her, yeah, yeah,
I **** her, yeah, yeah,
I **** her, yeah, yeah, yeah!

Shapes of ****** before my eyes
Just teach me to ******
Will **** make man more wise?

Here within my own *******
My **** just hurt my *****
But will it seem the same?

Come tomorrow will I be *****?
Come tomorrow maybe a soldier?
Come tomorrow may I be bolder than today

Just wanna ***** the night away,
With senoritas who can ****

Hey you! Do you **** me?
I used to **** next to you at school!
Oh, The Darkness... I think I'm hooked.

**** on **** and **** on ****;
**** on **** and **** **** ****;
**** **** **** tied up with string;
These are a few of my favourite things.

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I ***ing here?

God **** our **** Queen,
God **** our glorious ****
God **** the Queen.

Oh, my **** is like a red, red ****
That's newly **** in June
Oh, my **** is like a ****
That's sweetly **** in ****
As **** art thou, my bonnie ****,
So deep in **** am I
And I will **** thee still, my dear,
Till all the **** gang ****.

I've been searching for ****
On the streets, in the faces passing by.
I've been searching for ****,
But it's right there in your eyes.

On the twelfth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:
12 Drummers ****ming,
Eleven Pipers ***ing,
Ten Lords a ****ing,
Nine Ladies ****ing,
Eight Maids a ****ing,
Seven Swans a ****ming,
Six ***** a Laying,
Five **** Rings!
Four ****ing Birds,
Three French ****,
Two ****le Doves
and a **** **** in a **** ****.

Nymphs and shepherds
**** away, **** away.
Nymphs and shepherds
**** away, **** away
****, ****, ****, **** away!

Some people like to ****
Some people like to ****
Some people like to **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****
Let's have a **** ........forgotten the rest of it :-(

I like to ****, ****, ****, apples and bananas,
I like to ****, ****, ****, apples and bananas... (The song continues, with each alphabetical variation getting progressively lewder and therefore unsuitable for the pure minds on this forum.)

You better **** out
you better not ****
you better not ****
I'm telling you why
**** **** is ****ing to ****
He's making a ****
And ****ing it twice
Gonna **** out who's naughty or nice
Santa Claus is ****ing to ****

He knows when you are ****ing
He knows when you're a ****
He knows if you've been **** or ****
So be **** for goodness sake

[Repeat ****]

**** ****, black sheep,
Have you any ****?
Yes, ****, yes, ****,
Three bags full.
**** for the ****er, and **** for the dame,
And **** for the little **** who ****s down the ****.

Bring me my **** of burning ****!
Bring me my **** of desire!
Bring me my ****, oh **** unfold!
Bring me my **** of fire!

I will not cease from **** ****,
Nor shall my **** rest in my hand,
Till we have **** ****,
In ****'s **** and **** ****.

I could have ****ed all night
I could have ****ed all night
And still have begged for more
I could have **** my ****
And **** a thousand things
I'd never **** before
I'll never know what made it so exciting
When all at once my **** took flight
I only know when he began to **** with me
I could have ****ed, ****ed, ****ed..all night.

Yeah, yeah, yeah
She ***** you
Yeah, yeah, yeah
She ***** you
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

It's time to play the *****,
It's time to ***** the *****,
It's time to raise the ******* on the ****** Show tonight.

It's time to put on ******,
It's time to ***** up right,
It's time to **** the Muppets on the ****** Show tonight.

Why do we always come ****?
I guess we'll never ****.
It's like a kind of torture,
To have to ***** the ****.

*trumpet solo*

And now let's get ****** started.
(crowd)Why don't you get ****** started!
It's time to get ****** started,
On the most *****tional, in********nal, cele*******, Muppet*****al,
This is what we **** the **** Show!

*BLAAAAT!*

There is a ***** in New Orleans, they call the Rising ***.
And it's been the **** of every young boy, and God knows I'm ***.

My mother was a ******, she ***** my new blue jeans,
My father was a ******* man, down in New Orleans.

Now the only thing a ******* needs, is a ****case and a **unk.
And the only **** he's satisfied, is when he's all **unk.

Oh Momma, **** your children. Not to do what I have ****;

***** your life in ******* ******. In the House of the Rising ***.

Well, since my baby **** me,
I've found a new ***** to *****.
It's down the end of ****** ******
At ********** Hotel.

You make me so ****** baby,
I get so ******,
I get so ******, I could ***.

Last night I said these words to my girl:
"You know you never even try, girl"
Come on [come on], Come on [come on],
Come ON [come on], COME ON! [come on!]
Please **** me, o yeah,
Like I **** you.

Should auld acquaintance be ****,
And never brought to ****?
Should auld acquaintance be ****,
And auld lang syne?
CHORUS: For auld lang syne, my ****,
For auld lang syne,
We'll tak a cup of **** yet,
For auld lang syne!
And surely ye'll be your ****,
And surely I'll be mine,
And we'll tak a cup o **** yet,
For auld lang syne!
We twa hae **** about the braes,
And pou'd the gowans ****,
But we've wander'd monie a weary fit,
Sin auld lang syne.
We twa hae **** in the burn
Frae morning sun till ****,
But seas between us **** hae ****
And there's a hand my trusty ****,
And gie's a hand o thine,
And we'll tak a right guid-willie ****,
For auld lang sy

They're ****ing up the prisoners, and ****ing them in a pen,
  And all she wants to do is *****, *****.
Rebels been ****** since I don't know when,
  And all she wants to do is *****!
******* Cocktail is the local *****,
  And all she wants to do is *****, *****.
They *** them up right, in the kitchen sink,
  And all she wants to do is *****.

Crazy people ****ing 'round with ***** in their eyes,
  And all she wants to do is *****, *****, *****.
Wild-eyed ****** wavers who ain't afraid to ***,
  And all she wants to do is,
    All she wants to do is *****.

And make *******.
Can't feel the ****.
  ***ing off the street.
She wants to *****,
  She wants to **** down,
And all she wants to do is,
  All she wants to do is *****.

How about getting off of these **** How about stopping ****ing when I'm full up How about them transparent dangling ****s How about that ever elusive **** **** you India **** you terror **** you disillusionment **** you frailty **** you consequence **** you **** you silence

dammit no < br>s but you get the idea...

We hold these *****s to be self-evident, that all men are created *****, that they are endowed by their ******* with certain *********** *****s, that among these are ****, ******* and the pursuit of *********. --That to secure these rights, **********s are ********** among Men, deriving their just *****s from the consent of the ********, --That whenever any Form of ********** becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to ***** or to ******* it, and to institute new **********, laying its ********** on such principles and organizing its ****** in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. ********, indeed, will dictate that **********s long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to ******, while evils are ******able, than to ***** themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object *****es a design to ****** them under absolute ******ism, it is their right, it is their duty, to ***** off such *********, and to provide new *****s for their future security. --Such has been the patient sufferance of these *****ies; and such is now the necessity which *********s them to alter their former Systems of **********. The history of the present **** of Great Britain [George III] is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute ******* over these States. To prove this, let ****s be *******ed to a candid *****.

Remember when you were young, you ***** like the sun.
Shine on you crazy *******.
Now there’s a **** in your eyes, like black ****s in the sky.
Shine on you crazy *******.
You were ****** on the crossfire of ********* and *******, blown on the ***** ******.
Come on you ****** for faraway ********, come on you ********, you ******, You ******, and shine!