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Animal-Vegetable-Mineral-Abstract: The Pants Memorial Game
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The chairperson selects an object/idea/whatever and announces whether it's animal, vegetable, mineral, and/or abstract. The others have to ask questions to figure out what it is. Whomever guesses the object correctly is given the chair for the next round; repeat ad nauseam.
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Errrr......
[Inkspot] No.
[Bigsmith] I always thought that one of the key rules of this game was that you have to ask questions that have a yes or no answer. It has already been established that the answer is the title of a book. Would the wood be part of the book itself? If you mean "is the book made of wood?", the answer is I expect so, as most books are. If you mean "is it a book about wood" then the answer is I don't know, as I have never read it.
Is it more commonly a phrase or saying, that just happens to be the title of a book?
Is it a work of fiction?
Is it a book of spot facts?
....or even sport facts?
[Toby] Yes. Pursue this line.
[Chalky] The book that happens to bear the phrase as its title is not a work of fiction. According to my research, it is a series of lectures by the co-authors.
[Inksport] No, no.
Was the book first published before 1980?
Would the authors be well-known celebrities?
This is wide open - well-known phrases/sayings are invariably used for book titles, particularly non-fiction and biographies.
[Inkspot] I don't think so, but I can't tell from Amazon when the book was first published. I think it was in the early 1990's.
[Chalky] They may be well known in their field, but are not celebrities in the general sense.
Are they scientists?
[Raak] Yes, I think so.
Was the subject of the book the worlds environment?
Was the subject matter to do with the joy, or otherwise, of sex?
The green, green grass of home?
[Inkspot] No.
[Chalky] No.
[Raak] No.
Is it an anthropomorphisation?
It doesn't sound like it's a book we'll ever have heard of, certainly not all of us.
Is it about DIY in space?
If its not who you know, but what you know, all I know so far is its a factual book about lectures by people that may be scientists, and the title is a commonly used phrase. Perhaps Raak is holding back 'cause I haven't the foggiest; time to bow out.
Is the book by Jack Cohen and Ian Stewart?
I haven't the foggiest either.
Newton's Apple?
[Toby] No.
[Inkspot] No. Please persist.
[Raak] No and no.
[All] I've been trying to think of a clue that won't give the game away, but it's hard. Inkspot is closest so far. Think of something that is abstract and vegetable and has something to do with what you know.
is it one of those interminably dull books about parenting?
The tree of knowledge in the garden of Eden?
Actually, there are 3 books at Amazon, first listed is The Tree of Knowledge: Biological Roots of Human Understanding, which seems to match the one so far described - essays by scientists that no one's ever heard of. (I'll leave it to you if that's the book, the scientists, or both.)
Would this book (apart from the phrase/saying which constitutes its title) be known to the man-in-the-street? That is, as opposed to those interested in the particular field involved.
The Observer Book of Trees?
Do I remember Kim saying something about this one going quickly?
Whew!
[Chalky] No. What's that got to do with Abstract and Vegeta....oh, I see.
[Toby] YES! The answer I was looking for was the Tree of Knowledge. Congratulations (and the Chair) to Toby after a rather tortuous struggle.
[Dujon] Probably not. It's certainly of no interest to me.
[Bigsmith] I did, didn't I? That's called "tempting fate".
back patting
That was a good 'un, Kim, and well deduced, Tobes. We [in UK] will wait until you wake - time difference GMT -8 on the Pacific coast??
Thanks Chalky, and also Kim. Oddly enough, it looks like something I'll be interested in reading. And yes, that's the time difference, so you've got my attention from more or less 4pm through 2 in the morning. Let's try ANIMAL .
Is it human?
This game's equivalent of e4.
[Kim] Yup.
Alive now?
1. ... e4.
Male (oblig.)?
[Raak] No. [Dazed5] No.
A monarch?
[Raak] No.
English?
[plump] No.
Actress?
Brevity round, then?
Did it die after 1960?
[Brendan] No.
[Inkspot] No.
Is she American?
[Inkspot] Also not.
Was she born in Europe?
G'evening Toby, just a couple more before cocoa and bed.
[Inkspot] Yes,she was.
Was she born after 1800?
Drink is ready, last one then, see you roundabout tea time tommorrow
[Inkspot] Nope. Sleep well.
Does this mean I have to pay attention to my work now?
Famous for discovering something?
[Toby} No.
[Tuj] Nope. phew.
Hypatia of Alexandria?
French?
[Raak]No.
[Chalky] Also no.
Was she around prior to AD years?
[Dujon] No.
Was this lady known for her literary endeavours?
[Duj] Possibly somewhat during her lifetime. Not particularly so today.
Would this person perhaps be the wife of a monarch?
Well, it appears that there are no others with questions at this time.
[Duj] Ooo, tricky. There is a sense in which the answer is yes, but for most intents and purposes, no. Good question.
Did she live between 500AD and 1500AD?
Was she a religious figure?
Would her maiden name have been Tascher?
Should I be right I shall leave it for the coup de grâs to be delivered by someone else. If I am wrong I shall retire anyway.
Not tonight......
[Dujon] Guess we'll have to wait until later to get the answer to that one...
Was she a Kings mistress?
Come now Dujon you can't slip away from the chair that easily.
[Bm] Yes.
[Raak] Yes!
[Dujon] No.
[Inkspot] No.
Hot potato!
Was she an Emperor's wife?
Hildegard of Bingen?
[Raak] Indeed, yes! Woo-hoo. We have a winner!
As for the "married to a monarch" - nuns are, I believe, considered to be married to God, who is considered to be the King of Heaven...

Is the time difference a huge problem? I've had the fun of chairing now, and am happy to yield in future if it works better that way. (But I'm still going to guess.)
understands all in a blinding flash of inspiration, but then has a migraine and has to lie down.....
The next object is MINERAL
Is it man made?
Re: previous. In retrospect that was somewhat presumptious of me - I was feeling confident. :-( ... *chuckles at self* ... Hildegard and Josephine, as people, couldn't be much further apart!
Is it stone?
Is it metal?
Ah yes, Hildegard of Bingen - interesting fact: she wrote the first known description of the female orgasm. Only thing I know about her, except that she suffered from migraines and invented an imaginary language.
[Dujon] No.
[Toby] No.
[Breadmaster] Um...no.
Is it solid?
[Brendan] No.
Is it a liquid?
[Inkspot] No, at least, not as customarily understood.
Is it a plasma?
[Brendan] Yes.
Would it still be in a plasma state when its temperature is 20deg C?
What I mean is blood plasma would still be but volcanic plasma would have changed state to solid at 20degC.
[Inkspot] No. But I do not think that word means what you think it means.
lightning?
Out of depth stab in the dark.
ball lightning?
The Aurora Borealis?
Is it more than 20% Helium?
(erm, by mass)
[plump] No.
[snorgle] No.
[Toby] No.
[Brendan] Yes!
I expect to see the answer by tomorrow morning...
Just after the Big Bang?
Raak]yes you are right, an electrically neutral, highly ionized gas composed of ions, electrons, and neutral particles was not the first thing sprung to mind. If only the word plasma had only one definition. Next time it will be a translucent to opaque chalcedony and I'll still off in the long grass and in the wrong garden...again ;)
the Sun?
Or a new thin-panel television screen...
[Inkspot] No.
[Toby] YES!
Gosh, that would make it me again.

Stumbling in from a night of debauchery where I never actually *spoke* to John Adams.... I kept wanting to say to the people who wouldn't leave me alone in the loo, "Yes, I'm going to a party with the conductor/composer..." And so I did. And there was lots of lovely red wine... Right. But of consequence: ABSTRACT
Can it be perceived by one or more of the senses?
[Kim] Yes.
Is it an event on the calender?
[Inkspot] no.
Can it be percieved by the sense of smell?
Is it a wave of some kind?
Is it an action?
Can it be seen?
[Inkspot] No.
[Brendan] Technically I suppose it is, but I'm not sure that's very helpful.
[Breadmaster] No.
[Raak] The thing itself, no. The creation of the thing, yes.
Software?
Is it a sound?
[Software] No. [Brendan] Sure.
Can it be felt?
not touch, but you can feel the sun and wind.
[Inkspot] Again, I'm not sure how helpful this is, but yes, some parts more than others may generate a kinaesthetic response.
Music?
[Dujon] Yes!
Is it a drum beat?
[Inkspot]Some of it.
Is this a particular piece of music?
[Dujon] Yes!
The 1812 Overture?
Wild guess and retiring.
[Dujon] It is not.
Was it written before 1950?
The national Anthem
That'll be "Hen Wlad fy Nhadau"
Is it pop music?
The Hen who laid Ralph Nader? (my welsh isn't that good) ;-)
Ravel's Bolero?
Was it written by (an) American(s)?
Would it generally be considered "classical" as opposed to "pop" or "folk"?
Interesting fact: there is no official British national anthem. "God save the Queen" has never been made such, either by royal proclamation or parliamentary vote.
[Brendan] Yes.
[Inkspot] No.
[snorgle] No.
[Raak] No.
[Kim] No.
[Breadmaster] Yes.
Was the composer Italian?
[Inkspot] Nope.
German?
Russian?
Was it written before 1850?
Was it written for full orchestra?
[Chalky] Yes!
[Kim] So no.
[Kim] Yes.
[Inkspot] Yes.
Something by Beethoven?
[Chalky] Yes!
1812 Overture?
Scratch that, it's by Tschaikovsky.
Wellington's Victory
His fifth symphony?
The fourth movement of his ninth symphony?
(aka Ode to Joy) (aaka the EU anthem [where's JLE when you want to raise his blood pressure? ;) ])
[Raak] Scratched.
[Inkspot] No.
[Breadmaster] No.
[Brendan] Well, I'm tempted to say "No" and make you all discover that I intended the whole thing; but I think that's close enough. Chair to you, sir!
Ooh, wow, my first time! Thank you for being so flexible, Toby. Let's have an ANIMAL/ABSTRACT.
Mythical?
Is it a person?
An expression?
An anthropomorphism?
[Raak] No, not "mythical" exactly ...
[Inkspot] Yes.
[Software] No.
[Kim] No.
Are they fictional?
Is it a charater from a play?
If not "mythical", then "legendary"?
[Breadmaster] Certainly not! I'm shocked you could even suggest such a thing.
[Inkspot] No.
[Kim] Again, no, by a strict definition of "legendary" as coming from a legend. But possibly "legendary" in a looser sense amongst people here.
Are they someone like Robin Hood, legend loosely based on 'fact'?
[Inkspot] No, I would have said "Yes" if it was Robin Hood.
Is there a connection with ISIHaC?
Man?
[Chalky] Yes.
[Kim] Yes.
Mrs Trellis?
Pretty legendary, I'd say. And certainly NOT fictional!
Mr Trellis
(just noticed the sex)
[snorgle] Nope!
An occasional panel member like Jeremy Hardy?
[Inkspot] No. (Don't forget the abstract/quasi-legendary side of things; snorgle's on the right lines, but not quite there.)
Sven!
[Breadmaster] Correct! I was going to have Samantha but I decided she was a little too easy ... Your turn.
applauding widly whilst fixing Brendan's forgetfulness ...
Yay!
Well, who else could it have been?
Well, just for a change, let's go for something MINERAL.
Is it man-made?
Well timed, B'meister - must be that new yeast you started using a couple of weeks back, you're certainly proving that you can rise to the challenge by using your loaf and turning out some tasty guesses ..

.. now where's that butter?

[Chalky] - No. You're playing a good roll in this game, though, despite your crusty exterior.
Is it made of stone?
[Inkspot] On the whole, I think.
Is it a geological feature?
[Kim] No.
Is there only one of this thing?
[Toby] There is.
Is it an English landmark?
[Tuj] Nope.
Is it above ground?
Is it a building?
Is it the Grand Canyon?
Making a pointlessly specific guess, just for fun.
[Inkspot] That's a hard one to answer. In one way yes, in another way no.
[Raak] Nope. Not manmade, remember.
[Brendan] Nope. Alas.
Is it found on earth?
[Toby] It is not.
The moons of Jupiter?
For pity sake, child.
Is it somewhere on Mars?
Halley's Comet?
Does it orbit something other than the Sun?
[Inkspot] Mostly ice, isn't it, Halley's Comet?
Is it a planetary body?
[Toby] None of them.
[Raak] It is not.
[Inkspot] No.
[Brendan] Yes.
[Kim] Technically, no.
Surely it can only be a matter of time now!
Does it orbit something that orbits the Sun?
Is it further than 8 Astronomical Units from the Sun?
(8 AU being between the orbits of Jupiter and Saturn)
Is it The Moon (ie, ours)?
[Raak] It does.
[Brendan] It is.
[Kim] It is not.
Charon?
Pluto being 39.4 AU from the sun and Saturn orbiting at 9.5AU
[Inkspot] Nope.
The rings of Saturn?
One of the moons of Saturn?
I'm busy with these ones, Mudder!
[Brendan] Yes indeed.
Sorry, I forgot - [Raak] Nope.
Pass
I think Brendan's done all the hard work on this one....
Titan?
just one out of 31
Iapetus?
[Inkspot] I think you're right, actually, given Breadmaster's enthusiasm for the Huygens probe. But I like Iapetus for being the real location of the monolith in 2001.
[Kim] Sorry if I've been monopolising it a bit. I think Toby deserves a lot of credit for the initial realisation that it was extra-terrestrial.
[Inkspot] Yes indeed!
Inkspot snatches the answer from Brendan, who foolishly plumped for an obscure moon about which I know nothing, except for a vague recollection that it is piebald, being dark in front and light behind, or possibly the other way around, from its passage through the dust that orbits Saturn.
Thank you, Breadmaster, very close at the end there.

ABSTRACT / ANIMAL

Is it a human concept?
Is it something fictional?
Software] No, I think I understand what your asking.
Breadmaster]No...
Is it an anthropomorphism?
I have this strange sense of deja vu...
Kim] No
Can it be detected with one or more of the senses?
Deja vu, what? [Inkspot] Very close indeed; you simulposted me!
Brendan]Yes, so that's one thing (probably the only thing) I've got right today
Is it mythical?
I have this strange sense of deja vu...
Kim] Yes
Is it a mythical human?
Or possibly legendary?
I have this strange se-...no, stop it.
The Medusa?
Breadmaster]No
Kim]No
Toby]No
Is it an animal of myth (or fable)?
Kim]Yes, this particular animal is mythological, not fable though others may appear in fables
is it a particular one (eg Smaug) as opposed to a kind (eg dragons)?
Breadmaster]Yes it is one particular dragon.
The Welsh Dragon ?
Kalessin?
snorgle] YES, an inspired guess
Kim]so sorry no.

snorgle once the crowd have put you down again and the cheering has subsided,the chair is yours

Abstract
Yay! And not really inspired, considering where I live and one is gazing at me as I type. But who is the Dragon Kalessin? Google throws up a bunch of rock websites - and some Ursula LeGuin excerpt I'd never heard of. Do tell, Kim.
Can it be seen?
Not in and of itself, no.
Is it fictional?
Erm, sort of.
Do people pretend that it's real?
Is it mythical?
Ursula le Guin's "Earthsea" quartet is why I read the first Harry Potter book and then never went back.
Is it a human concept?
A badly phrased question; feel free to give a badly ophrased answer!
Would it be a religious icon?
Would you experience it in a dessert?
Raak - I'd say yes.
Kim - Not really.
Tuj - Yes. Or Eys, if you want it badly phrased.
Dujon - Nope.
Inkspot - Are you on drugs? That means no.
Is it an anthropomorphisation?
Did Inkspot perhpas mean desert? Although I've experienced some rather heavenly moments inspired by my dessert...
So a troll from Mount Blancmange can be discounted then?
Is it from folk lore?
getting colder!
Toby - no.
Inkspot - no and no.
Is it a scientific concept?
Is it connected with ethics?
Transubstantiation?
Brendan - Assuming you mean like a law or theory, then no.
Breadmaster - No.
Raak - no.
Does it have anything to do with ways of measuring or measures of time?
So to paraphrase (for my own benefit, since I'm having more trouble following this one for some reason), what we do know is that it's sort of fictional, people pretend it's real, and it's a human concept. It is not mythical, folkloric, a religious icon, a scientific or ethical concept, nor visible in and of itself. Nor is it experienced in a dessert.

That lets out the Easter Bunny, whis is a folkloric religious icon frequently experienced as a dessert...
CAn it be percieved be any of the senses?
Marriage?
Toby - No, and you're on target with your precis.
Inkspot - well, taking into consideration what Toby said - erm, not really, but yes.
Raak - No, you wierdo.:)
Is it an expression or saying?
Toby] at least one of us knows what we're doing, and its not me.
Money?
Gravity?
[Inkspot] That makes none of us.
Is it in some way related to economics?
Generalising from Raak's inspiration.
Is it a universal human concept?
The law?
Something associated with the weater?
s/weater/weather
Lunchtime?
this is dragging on a bit, innit?
Inkspot - not really an expression or saying.
Raak - not money.
Toby - not gravity really obscure reverse referential cough
Brendan - not related to economics.
Raak - not the law.
Inkspot - not weather-related.
Raak - not time-related, remember?
An emotion, like love?
Or a convention we all accept to make life a little simpler?
Like the international date line.
An inquiry into the state of someone's health, uttered merely as a ritual move in the game of smalltalk, and without any intention that it be taken literally?
Is it a speech act of any sort?
Toby - not an emotion, like love, and not a convention we accept to make life simpler.
Raak - Dear God, no! Stop taking those drugs now! And it's not a speech act! You're all going completely the wrong direction - (go the other way!)
Witchcraft?
Some kind of art?
Yes, but what is the other way from everything?
Magnetism?
A form of alternative medicine?
A rainbow made from moonlight?
I just like the idea and wondered what clour it would be....wanders off to have a cup tea
Is it a direction?
Is it related to the arts or entertainment?
Do people want it?
Raak - no....(!)
Toby - no. (Nothing? Upwise?)
Inkspot - not magnetism, or a form of alternative medecine, or a rainbow made from moonlight. Look here for info about it
Brendan - no.
Snodgrass - No, not really.
Guest Login - a catamaenic person, perhaps?
A Clue! So, it is something a woman might want at that time of the month? Valium? A blood transfusion? A divorce? A heavy machine gun? Two heavy machine guns? All those are rather concrete, except the divorce.
A vow of silence?
immaculate conception on the astral plane?
Something I might want upwise at that time month? Hmm.
This one seems to have been hanging around for AGES. I guess that's what happens when we overdose on Abstract. I'll remain detached until it's done.
[Chalky] I decided that a while ago. I'm stumped with this one. It's so Abstract it's not actually conceivable (Berkeley is vindicated!).
Not that direct a clue, Raak. So none of those. Think of characters who particularly fulfill that definition. And something about them.
Toby - nope.
Chalky, Breadmaster - COWARDS!
What clue?
Points upwise.
Hothead Paisan, Lesbian terrorist?
Or Tank Girl, Charlie's Angels, Shelob, Death, Desire, Delirium, or...running out of catamenics and catamaenads.
I need a bigger dictionary!
*riffling through* catamaenic?
Weightlessness?
I really didn't think it was that hard! Think HORROR!
If I said "UFO" would I be headed in the right direction?
Cthulhu?
Black Magic?
what is catamaenic? Google could find no matches, and I don't count made up words like upwise clues either, and I have found some of the answers cofusing, but thats just me reading reading things far too literally. Perhaps if I take a nother print of the game thing may look clearer
Something cosmetic, like a Boob job for instance
PMT?
[Inkspot] I couldn't find catamaenic anywhere, even the OED, but catamenic means menstrual. Catamaenic could be a formation from catamaenad, the Maenads being the Furies, and cata- being a prefix of rather vague meaning.
Count Dracula?
Can it be seen? Not in and of itself, no
Is it fictional? Erm, sort of
Do people pretend that it's real? I'd say yes
Is it mythical? Not really
Is it a human concept? Yes.
Would it be a religious icon? Nope
Would you experience it in a dessert? Are you on drugs? That means no
Is it an anthropomorphisation? No
Is it from folk lore? No
Is it a scientific concept? Assuming you mean like a law or theory, then no
Is it connected with ethics? No
Transubstantiation? No
Does it have anything to do with ways of measuring or measures of time? No
CAn it be percieved be any of the senses? erm, not really, but yes
Marriage? No, you wierdo
Is it an expression or saying? not really an expression or saying
Money? not money
Gravity? not gravity really obscure reverse referential cough
Is it in some way related to economics? not related to economics
Is it a universal human concept? This question not answered
The law? not the law.
Something associated with the weater? not weather-related
Lunchtime? not time-related
An emotion, like love? not an emotion, like love
Or a convention we all accept to make life a little simpler? and not a convention we accept to make life simpler
An inquiry into the state of someone's health, uttered merely as a ritual move in the game of smalltalk, and without any intention that it be taken literally? Dear God, no! Stop taking those drugs now! And it's not a speech act! You're all going completely the wrong direction - (go the other way!)
Is it a speech act of any sort?
Witchcraft? no....(!)
Some kind of art? no. (Nothing? Upwise?)
Magnetism? Inkspot - not magnetism
A form of alternative medicine? not a form of alternative medecine
Is it a direction? No
Is it related to the arts or entertainment? No, not really
Do people want it? a catamaenic person, perhaps?
A Clue! So, it is something a woman might want at that time of the month? Valium? A blood transfusion? A divorce? A heavy machine gun? Two heavy machine guns? All those are rather concrete, except the divorce.
Not that direct a clue, Raak. So none of those. Think of characters who particularly fulfill that definition. And something about them.
A vow of silence?
immaculate conception on the astral plane?
What clue?
Points upwise.
Hothead Paisan, Lesbian terrorist?
Or Tank Girl, Charlie's Angels, Shelob, Death, Desire, Delirium, or...running out of catamenics and catamaenads.
Weightlessness?
Think HORROR!really didn't think it was that hard!
I am just stabbing at straws now for a character that is sort of non-anthropomorphisation fictional human concept, that people pretend is real, that can and cannot be percieved by any of the senses with Catamaenic HORROR
Is it the frustration we are all experiencing?
Is it a character from a book?
After seven days I still have no real idea, perhaps there is a important question about this Abstract that still needs to be played.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Inkspot] Thanks for that, although I think maybe the question is 'What's the point?'

C'mon snorglekins - we're practically dead from attrition here. Give us some help before we just declare another topic altogether.
maenads...
[Raak] It contributes absolutely nothing to the game, but then nor does the game seem to at this current moment, so may I point out that the Erinyes or the Eumenides are the Furies, and the Maenads are the crazed female followers of Dionysus (famous for going berserk during bacchanals and ripping things apart). Just so you know.
oxford pocket dictionary
cata- prefix 1 down. 2 wrongly. [Greek]
oh yeah...I'm guessing this is just the greek word, the preposition meaning "down" (and, I suppose, wrongly :p). Although quite what plonking this with maenic means (that'll be the english english spelling) I have no idea.
The light of a master mason, which is darkness visible?
Just guessing now, perhaps you can tell.
[ZK] Thanks for the correction. "-maen-" may be a hypercorrection of "-men-", as even the complete OED doesn't list it.
men
[Raak] Are you in america?
Vampires?
Wow, this is impressive...
The difference between 5 cubed and 125 in very strong gravitational fields?
[ZK] No, the UK.
No to everyone, except Inkspot - well, it's no to you too, really, but yes, think of a character in a book, how many damn horror writers do you know!?! And also think of the Maenads - just come on, you damn eejits!
The upending of a vat of menstrual blood at a senior prom caused not by psychokinesis but as a side-effect in the outpouring stream of casaulity generated by the gentle flapping of the wing of that moth I should have crushed instead of setting free when I was seven?
Well, see, that's helpful now, since we know it is and isn't a character in a book.
Is this a nom de plume?
You know I'll give it to Toby - since he mentioned PSYCHOKINESIS! Yes, that was the answer - it just popped into my head after last week's episode of Dark Place.
Know you now the answer, wasn't it obvious? :-P
oo-er. After that I'm inclined to say, "Vegetable. (And it's a turnip.)"

However.
MINERAL
A fossilised turnip?
A metal container (for turnips)?
A modern art installation in which a rusty nail represents the turnip in all of us?
No, no, & no. Not at all related to a turnip.
Is it made of stone?
snorgle] Oh yeah, I remember now .
Yes, predominantly.
Is it a monument of some sort?
Of some sort quite possibly, but not as I think you or I would commonly understand it.
Is it on the American continent?
Is it a unique thing?
I.e. like Cleopatra's Needle, and unlike obelisks in general.
[Inkspot] No.
[Raak] Yes.
Is it man made?
Is it a swede?
[Dujon] No.
[snorgle] Yes, in the alternate universe of tragical mirth, brief tedium, hot ice, and wondrous strange snow. In this one, swedes, nor yet Swedes, are not mineral ;-)
Is it in Britain?
No, it isn't.
Is it on land? [as opposed to underwater or floating in the cosmos]
Is it in Asia?
Table Mountain?
Is it smaller than Nelson's column?
Is it bigger than a pony?
[Chalky] Yes.
[Breadmaster] No.
[Software] No.
[Inkspot] No.
[snorgle] Yes.
Is it more than 1000 years old?
Yes, fundamentally.
Is it Ayer's Rock?
No, but it's closer to all of you (including Dujon) than it is to me.
Is it in Europe?
Nor there.
Is it in an Arabic country?
Does it have religious site?
[Raak] Also not.
[Inkspot] Well, I suppose it may, but a desultory web search turns up nothing in particular, and it's not what we associate with this in general.
Is it in Africa?
Does it lie between the equator and the Tropic of Capricorn?
double straddle due to time zone invoked ;)
Yes and yes.
Is it a mountain at all?
Does its name begin with the letter "K"?
Is Dujon trying to steal my idea?
Sorry, it's late and I've been eating Frosties.
Not at all, Ma'am - Just narrowing it down... :-) No, I will not gazump you - I don't wish to win. So, if there is a yes/yes it's all yours - if you are fast enough and still awake!
yes/yes
so its not..
the giant rock carrot of Heysham?
Kilimanjaro - leaping in as an opportunist - ?
Indeed, Software has seized upon the correct opportunity and identified Mount Kilimanjaro.
*clapclapclap*
curse!
Oh- err, somebody say something? What? It's my turn. Oh bu**er! Now I have to do some work.
Right, this time its MINERAL and ANIMAL with ABSTRACT connections. Sounds complicated, hun?
Should be a line somewhere...
Thats better. Now start again...
Right, this time its MINERAL and ANIMAL with ABSTRACT connections. Sounds complicated, hun?
Is it a man made?
Congrats Software, a standard opening to begin with.
Is the mineral metal?
Is it an anthropomorphisation?
I can't help it, I just like the word!
Is it the Grim Reaper?
Sorry, I'm in a strange mood today
Is it Rocking Horse Droppings?
Is it some sort of chalk figure carved in a hillside?
Like one of those horses, or the Cerne Abbas giant?
Goddamit! That was my feminine side expressing itself, yeah, that's it ...
Thanks, all:
Ink: yes
Raak: Undoubtedly.
Kim: Some might say.
GL: ditto.
Snod: No.
Brendan: Don't be ridiculous. (That's my feminine side).
Is the Animal part made to be eaten?
Are those who would say it was the Grim Reaper just being rude?
(I sold my feminine side to a porn site, years ago)
Is it a homicidal cyborg or some other kind of killing machine?
Just so I know.
Is its function to produce sound?
Playing to your strengths, eh ZK?
A knight in shining armour?
Is it a fictional character?
Is it the Borg?
One of the terminators?
Or a presidential candidate?
Sorry, I only work days :-)
Inkspot: No.
GL Yes.
ZK: That's a matter of opinion.
Tuj: Not mainly.
Raak: Absolutely not.
Kim: No.
BM: Err..
Snorgle: No.
all: No.
Is it the army? or assosiated with the army?
Is the animal a horse?
No and No.
Kevin Warwick?
Microsoft?
Is it a company?
Seven of Nine?
Ah, great insight!
Brendan: Who?
GL: Yes.
Raak: Are you not confident? Your first answer was spot on!

WELL DONE RAAK! Over to you!

The next item is MINERAL.
Is it a single item?
1. e4
Does it have a specific function? (ie man-made non-decorative item)
Is it made from metal?
[Kim] No.
[GL] Yes.
[Inkspot] At least partly.
Is it found in the home?
[Software] A not entirely accurate, rather out of date, very biased answer to your question can be found here.
Is it man made?
-Brendan. I see, I think...
Did it exist before 1801?
[Brendan] It can be.
[Software] Yes (see GL's Q)
[Bm] No.
Is its function to produce sound, images or a combination of the two?
Does it use electricity ?
Is it a bridge of some kind?
Is it portable?
This is to replace my previous question, having seen Brendan's. *administers sharp rap to own wrist*
Is it made also from glass?
[Kim] Yes!
[Inkspot] Yes!
[Bm] No.
[Bm] Yes!
[Toby] No.
Is it a communication device?
Is it a laptop computer?
[Inkspot] No.
[GL] No.
A CD Walkman?
A camera?
A TV?
[B] No. [S] No. [GL] No. But one of those three is closest.
A DVD player?
A radio
A walkman (non-CD variety)?
A camcorder?
A portable DVD player?
CCTV?
[Inkspot] No. [GL] No. [Brendan] No. [all] No. [Kim] No. [snorgle] No.
One of those six is precisely as close as one of the previous three.
A mini-disc player?
Is a video component a necessary part of this thing?
[Inkspot] No.
[Toby] No.
Is it a media player?
Is it a pair of headphones?
MP3 player?
[Inkspot] Yes!
[GL] No.
[Kim] YES!
So who can get the bullseye?
An MP3 walkman?
If so, I guess Kim already hit the bullseye
[GL] Isn't that the same as an MP3 player?
The answer is a particular one.
When you say a particular one are we looking for make and model?
Not all MP3 players are portable
[GL] The brand name will do. It's quite well known.
[GL] Oh, and it is portable.
A Sony mP3 player?
(poach what?) :)
[ZK] No.
The brand name, btw, is not the manufacturer's name.
An iPod?
[Toby] *dingdingdingdingding* YES.
TRUMPET FANFARE:*doop-diddy-doop-diddy-doop-di-dee-doo!*
ABSTRACT
Is it the fearful symmetry of a tiger burning bright in the darkness of the night?
Ok, and I might win the lottery as well. :-)
Is it an action?
That'll learn me to have a days leave, and after go for a days shopping in Bath with Mrs Inkblot;stressed!!!!
[Raak] I do so want to say yes - I even thought on my way home tonight, "Raak's just going to flat-out guess this." But sadly no. Strangely, however, the general idea is pretty much spot-on.
[Inkspot] No.
Does this have anything to do with Katmandu?
[Dujon] No, nothing whatsoever.
So is it in some way taken from a poem?
Is it related to mispelling the names of animals?
[Brendan] Not a poem.
[Tuj] No ;-)
Is it a phobia?
[Inkspot] no.
Keeping with the mountain theme - is it associated with Kilamanjaro?
It's all right, I just get fixated from time to time.
[Dujon] Nope.
Is it a bear with a headache?
Is it a human concept?
OK, now all the standard guesses have gone, let's try something off the wall.
Is it connected with religion?
[Inkspot] Mmmmmm - no.
[Tuj] Definitely.
[Kim] No.
Is it fictional?
Is it a saying or expression?
[Raak] The source is, yes.
[Inkspot] Yes.
Is the source later than 1900?
[Raak] No.
Is it from a play?
[Inkspot] Yes.
Is it taken from a Shakespearean play?
[Chalky] Yes indeed. That narrows it down a bit then ;-)
Is it the fact that a rose, by any other name, would smell as sweet?
Does it involve Weaponry, a dagger before me for example?
Does it end well?
Does it involve Music being the food of love?
Or the winter of our discontent?
Our fate, that is written not in our stars, but in ourselves?
The Quality of Mercy?
Is the play it's taken from a tragedy?
Is it the Title of the play?
The Taming of the Shrew?
Is it from one of the histories?
Is Toby ever going to answer these questions?
Is it all the world being a stage, one man in his time playing many parts, etc.?
Isn't Toby in some other time zone? Hence the asynchronicity. (Is that a word?)
[A Non - c'mon out the closet!] FYI Toby is in Seattle USA and is hopefully enjoying a nice sleep at the moment. [GMT minus 8 hours]
Toby lives in one of the colonies and will be with us after a morning revelie and bed inspection.
I only asked. I wasn't exactly serious. [Chalky] what do you mean out of the closet? besides I've been using A Non as an avitar since Camdon Lock in '97
Much ado about nothing?
The Comedy of Errors ?
[A Non] No worries. You only asked - we only replied :-)
Is it Alls Well That Ends Well
The unkindest cut of all?
Are we such stuff as dreams are made on?
Poor Toby, he's going to have his work cut out for him....[Snodgrass] I've already asked that....
Well .... Toby will certainly have her work cut out if she's hoping to fit in a sex-change before she returns *ba-boom-tish* [sorry K - cheap shot, I know]
Toby will have its work cut out dealing with peoples comments
Is it This Too Too Solid Flesh?
Oh I dunno, Gusset, it's rather pleasant having a little natter while we're waiting. I'm sure Toby won't object.
Is it a Midsummer Night's Dream?
True, but if I can't spell my name correctly I'm in trouble
All's Well That Ends Well ?
GL]That one is definetely fictional, and a favourite.
Does it concern the quality of mercy?
I think "Guset Login" is a great name!
Hmmm. Lots and lots and lots of no's, plus one yes: Guest Login got it what was apparently hours ago with the "winter of our discontent." But it looks like you've been having fun in my absence ;-)
OK, That was unexpected. Umm... Animal
Human?
Just for the sake of originality ...
[Brenda]n yes
Man?
[Kim] Yes
Damn this clearly isn't as hard as I thought
Was that the answer or do we still need to narrow it down? :)
A gentleman on business from Porlock who, by interrupting Coleridge during the composition of Kubla Khan, caused the latter part of said poem to be irretrievably lost?
Though, if we believe Douglas Adams, this may well have been a Good Thing.
Alive?
[ZK] pmsl
Is he alive now? (Or at least, when you last looked, as you never know, not in this day and age)
Have I just asked that?
Goddammit! I was too busy wondering what "pmsl" means to register the question.
[ZK] No, you still need to narrow it down a lot [Brendan] What? I don't think so, but I don't understand the question [Chalky] At one time [Breadmaster] No [Chalky] Not quite
[ZK] No, you still need to narrow it down a lot
[Brendan] What? I don't think so, but I don't understand the question
[Chalky] At one time
[Breadmaster] No
[Chalky] Not quite

darn it

Was he born after 1800?
[GL] If I was right, you'd have known, so not to worry. The short version is that Coleridge woke up from a drugged-up dream with Kubla Khan complete in his head (or so he claimed), and proceeded to write it down. But then he was interrupted by this guy who came visiting from Porlock on business, and when he sat back down to it he'd forgotten the rest, hence the poem is incomplete.
A sportsman?
An artistic or literary person?
Alan Rickman?
Take that Polonius!
Did he die in the last 50 years?
Alan Rickman isn't dead!
[Brendan] Yes [Inkspot] No [Raak] Not that I'm aware of [Tuj] He's still alive isn't he? [snorgle] No
Did he die in the 20th century?
[Chalky] No
Jack the Ripper?
[Inkspot] No
A political figure (including royalty or the Pope)?
[Raak] No
Is he British?
Brunel?
[Inkspot] Yes
[Raak] Yes
What an anti-climax!

Ok, the next is MINERAL, with ANIMAL and VEGETABLE connections.

A stainless steel kitchen knife?
A little bit knee trembling foreplay then straight down business.
Is it made of metal?
Sorry it was an anti-climax, I hadn't expected to be setting one so soon
[Inkspot] No.
[GL] You wouldn't really think of it as something metal, but metal is involved.
If not metal would it be thought of as being made of plastic?
Would I (or anyone else living in the country) find it on a farm?
Did it exist before 1800?
[Inkspot] Not really, although plastic is undoubtedly also present.
[GL] It would be a very unusual farm that had one of these.
[Brendan] No.
Do the animal and vegetable live on the mineral?
Is it man made?
Is it electrically powered?
Is it meant to be moved around?
[Gusset Login] I suspect Raak meant it was an anticlimax to hit upon the answer so rapidly and unexpectedly, rather than that the answer itself was anticlimactic.
Is the animal connection, human?
[BM] I understand what Raak meant and if I had honestly thought I'd win, I would have thought of something harder to guess.
[Kim] Tricky one...let's say that the animal is alive and the vegetable isn't.
[GL] Yes.
[Inkspot] Yes.
[Bm] No.
[GL] Yes.
[Bm, GL] Indeed, no criticism intended.
[Kim] ...and the mineral is pretty much all around them.
Is it a building of some sort?
Is it smaller than a telephone kiosk?
[GL] Yes, hence...
[Inkspot] No.
Is it a Florist?
OK silly question, but worth a shot
M o r n i n g t o n C r e s c e n t ?
[Chalky] what's the vegtable connetion to MC?
[GL] No, but you're thinking on the right lines.
[Chalky] No.
A greengrocer's?
[Bm] No, not quite that close to the right line.
Is the vegetable wood?
Is it a particular retailer? eg Tesco
[Bm] There might well be some, but that's not the main vegetable component.
[Inkspot] No.
Is the vegatable clothes?
s/vegatable/vegetable!
[Dujon] No.
A bakers?
Is it a well-known place [a one-off]?
[Inkspot] No.
[Chalky] Not a one-off. The sort of thing it is is well-known.
Would it be found on the High Street?
Newsagent?
Is the building a shop?
[Chalky] Yes.
[Inkspot] No.
[Brendan] Yes.
Health food shop?
A fast-food joint?
A cafe/restaurant?
An off-license?
[Inkspot] I once went into a health food shop and asked if they had any of a certain thing which the mystery object sells, and it was as if I'd asked for Watney's Red Barrel in a real ale pub.
[Software] No.
[GL] YES! But that's not the whole story.
[Chalky] No.
Is it a retailer of a particular type of hot beverage?
A coffee shop?
A garden centre?
They have cafés...
A vegetarian restaurant?
(Since otherwise there'd be a dead animal component as well as the live one?)
Starbucks?
[Inkspot] Yes.
[GL] YES! But that's still not the whole story. (And "coffee" was indeed the substance that the health food shop looked askance at a request for.)
[ZK] No.
[Brendan] No.
[Kim] It depends on the branch.
A bookshop with a coffee shop inside it?
(the dead vegetables are books?)
A Coffee shop that sells books?
(the dead vegetables are coffee)
[Brendan] No.
[GL] No.
Is it is branch of Starbucks in a particular location?
The vegetables are the ones serving behind the counter.
Is it a take away coffee shop?
The words clutching and straws spring to mind
A coffeshop with a WiFi hotspot?
Is it a cyber cafe?
A Starbucks that is Book-Crossing friendly?
For info, click here. This has been a public service announcement. Thank you.
[Kim] No.
[GL] I'm sure they'll do takeaway if you ask, but most people sit down.
[snorgle] No.
[Software] You are within a gnat's semiote, but...
[all] *DINGDINGDINGDINGDING* A cybercafe is what it is.
OK give me a second...
This one is a MINERAL
Metal?
Rock?
[Raak] Asking for coffee in a health food shop! I'm surprised they didn't throw you out on your ear, or some similarly painful body part.
Is it man made?
Just goes to show, I'd have done the same in seeking out fair trade typish coffee, but seeing as I'm a tea drinker I wouldn't anyway.
the demon drink....well...one of many
They sell barleycup and stuff in health-food shops...shouldn't have been a problem...
Oh yeah, a suggestion
Is it smaller than a phone box?
[Tuj] No
[BM] yes, but it's more than that
[Inkspot] no
[ZK] usually
Is the mineral an element?
Is it solid?
[ZK] it is made from at least one element.
[Inkspot] Yes
Would I find it in my house?
An erratic rocks, left miles from its origin point by a glacier?
[GL] I haven't been to your house. [Brendan] No
Would it be found in the UK?
[Software] Yes
Is it likely to be found in a residential building?
Is it something would be useful to a human being?
[GL] In some, but not as many as you used to
[Chalky] Human beings have been known to find uses for it
Is it decorative?
Coal?
[Chalky] I've often found it to be, but I'm odd
[Bigsmith] Actually, YES. Well done sir/madam/miss!
We'll go with A N I M A L this time.
Human?
Well done!
[Brendan] No (and thanks!)
Mammal?
Is it extinct?
Would it be found in the UK?
Save me thinking
Is it bigger than a loaf of bread?
[all] Yes [Inkers] No [Softers] No (though many others of similar ilk would be) [Gusset Loggers] Yes
Marsupial?
[Kim] Nay
Is it aquatic?
[Inkspot] No (though swimming has been known).
Is it a pig?
Is it kept as a pet?
[GL] No
[Raak] Yes
On an unrelated subject
[Raak] Top work on the Oblig. Limericks page!
Is it a dog?
[Gusset Thing] Yes - BUT - need to be more specific.
Is it a specific dog?
Getting warmer...
[GL] It certainly is.
Right, I'm off down the pub now. Will be sober and on-line by about 10.00am tomorrow, so let's see if anyone can get it by then.
Is it Cliffard The Big Red Dog?
I sincerely hope not
A dingo?
Dogmatix
Is it a breed of dog? Or a particular dog, like Lassie?
I don't believe it
Snorgle hits the back of the net - L A S S I E it is!
goes wild
But seriously, does anyone know what timezone he/she/it is in?
in the Principality
snorgle lives in Gods own country and is probably busy at the moment sledging Caerphilly Hill and building snowmen.
I thought Gods own country was Australia
Animal
I'm in Wales - just busy today! And I'll tell you now, it's not a caracal lynx, friend or otherwise.
Is it human?
Gusset - yes.
Are they alive today?
Is it a he?
I was reliably informed that New Zealand is God's own country, but the report may have been sexed up.
Are they from God's Own Country?
Not sure where that is either. For the sake of someone I've upset recently, let's call it Wales.
Inkspot - Not alive today. BM - Yep. Tuj - no.
Was he born before 1801?
Did he die a violent death?
Royalty?
BM- no. ZK - no. Raak - no.
A Wright brother?
Was he a musician?
Raak - no. Inkspot - yes.
Elgar?
American?
Elvis?
Jim Morrison?
Raak - no. BM - no. Tuj - no. Inkspot - no.
Classical?
Toby - yes. (in the usually accepted sense - I don't know enough about music to break it down any further!)
Zemlinsky?
Raak - nope.
German?
Raak - yep.
Did he die after 1940?
Inkspot - no.
Brahms?
Was he a pianist?
Bach?
Toby - no. Inkspot - Probably, but that isn't what he was famous for. Gusset login - no.
Does his last name begin with 'B'?
Was he born before 1900?
Gusset - no. all - yes.
Is he famous for being a composer?
Inkspot - yes!
Richard Wagner?
Inkspot - no.
Are you sure he's German?
Felix Mendelssohn
Gustav Mahler?
I would just like to say that my son Gustav (1860-1911), was born in Kalischt in what was then Austria, but is now part of the Czech Republic.
Mozart?
Handel?
all - well, I double-checked on several websites and they all agree, so yes.
Inkspot - no.
Gusset - no.
Chalky - no and no.
Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nürnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- shönedanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm?
Schumann?
Gluck?
Raak - cut down on the speed.(that means no)
Chalky - no and no.
[Clue]He isn't well-known, at least I hadn't heard of him before last week, when I went to a performance of his most famous work.
Would that have been a symphonic work with no voices?
I.e., not an opera or an oratorio.
Was he born before 1850?
Toby - no. Gusset - no.
Sigmund Romberg?
Carl Ditters von Dittersdorf?
Johann Joseph Fux?
[Everyone] While we are waiting to find out which dead German composer snorgle is, I invite you all to take this short test. Which dead German composer are you?.
Hans Pfitzner?
or maybe.... Max von Schillings?
or perhaps ... Engelbert Humperdinck?
or even --- the OTHER Wagner, Siegfried I think ?
[Chalky] Engelbert Humperdinck was English
[all] No he wasn't ... and I thought snorgle was in the chair? :-)
[Chalky] snorgle is in the chair but that doesn't stop me point out that Englebert Humperdinck wasn't German, and then discovering that there's more than one Englebert Humperdinck. And one of them was German. My humble appology is in the post.
[all] teehee!
In any case, the English one was actually Gerry Dorsey when he used to sing cover versions on Saturday Club hosted by Brian Matthew on the BBC Light Programme in the '60's.
Chalky - yes! Engelbert Humperdinck (the original one) it is! I saw Hansel & Gretel last week, and was surprised by the name - until I looked into it a bit more.
***Goes wild for Chalky***
Splendid!
Now .... let me think ...
Is it Animal, Vegetable, Mineral or Abstract?      Sorry, Chalky!    ;-)
[Dujon] Yes. ;)
... ah yes
Time for an ...
A B S T R A C T
Is it a fictional character/being?
Might as well get this sorted up front this time.
Hello Duj :-) No, sorry. T'ain't one of them there things.
Is it particular to humans?
That's it for tonight. Unless I change my mind.
Is it the unbearable lightness of Being?
Is it a human concept?
Standard opening
[Duj] Yes
[Raak] Curiously enough, that is one of my favourite phrases and have longed to slip it into one of these games. Much as I'd love to say 'yes', in this instance, alas No
[Software] I suppose it must be [see Duj reply]
Is it descriptive of an action?
Is it an emotion?
Is it a religion?
My appologies again
Is it a phrase or expression?
Is it easier than the last one?
[Snodgrass] Sort of, yes
[Gusset] No
[all] No ... hey forget it - I, too, am less than perfect :-)
[Inkspot] In a manner of speaking, yes it is
[Gusset] Indubitably
Getting your leg over?
Hung like a horse?
Is it related to sex?
A leap of faith?
Would it make someone happy? :-)
Is it said/used in everyday conversation?
Does it contain numbers.
?
*rushing back from a meeting...*
[Inkspot] Er ... no
[Bigsmith] Nope
[all] one might think so in view of the previous two questions - and as a matter of fact it *could* be :-)
[Raak] No - but you're moving in the right direction -ish
[Software] NO! good question
[Gusset] Yes
[Kim] It *might* contain numbers but don't let that mislead you
Is it conected with the church?
[all] Not specifically
Can it be percieved by any of the senses?
is it a sinlge word?
single word, even
Curse you dyslexia! You win again!
A curse?
Swearing?
A magic spell?
[Inkspot] It can be perceived by all of the senses
[all] Yes - with the addition of a definite or indefinite article
[Software] Not really
[Gusset] Noo-o-o - but swearing might be applicable afterwards :-)
[Raak] No
Pain?
[Gusset] No
Life?
The universe?
A nightmare?
[Gusset] No
[Raak] nah
... although true pessimists might say that both were this [that was a BIG CLUE].

on spotting a Raak simulpost ... not a nightmare.

It?
Everything?
Would it make someone unhappy?
[Inkspot] No to both
[Raak] The opposite to that question was asked a while back :-) Your answer is YES, it might make someone unhappy, but not necessarily deeply unhappy.
Suffering?
Disappointment?
Pointless?
Being dumped?
[Chalky] Just checking.
[Gusset, Software] One might suffer and be disappointed as a result but the answer is more the 'action' rather than the consequence.
[all] erm .. no
[Raak] No, but being dumped may fall into this category - a more generic word is needed.
Losing?
Is it something most people have probably experienced?
[all] No - but close
[Breadmaster] Absolutely.
Failure?
Rejection?
Missing last orders?
The blues?
Antidisestablishmentarianism?
[all] not quite
[Software] No
[B'smith] No & No
[Gusset] No

CLUE: 'all' did this in the last game :-)

Mistake?
Fuck up?
WELL DONE!! [Software] gets to the post first.
[all] f*cks up :-) sorry
Well I never!!
**Tries to hide behind hands with embarrassment.** Now let me see...thinks :-)

I know! Mineral with Animal connections.

The statue of Greyfriars Bobby in Edinburgh?
A dog lead?
Is it made of metal?
Is it larger than a ballcock?
Is it smaller than a phonebox?
That was quick!
snorgs: No.
all: No
GL: Yes, partly.
BS: Perhaps.
Simpost
all: Yes
Is it decorative?
Does it *look* like an animal?
Would I use it *on* an animal
Is the Animal connection human?
Is the animal connected to it a domesticated one?
A horseshoe?
Is it made for a specific purpose?
Is it a mobile phone?
LG: No.
all: No.
Kim: Yes.
Tuj: No, see Kim.
Brendan: No.
Inks: Yes.
all: No.
Is the non-metal component plastic?
(psst, Software, you missed Breadmaster's "Does it look like an animal?")
Does one wear it?
Is it electrical?
Does it connect physically to a human?
Humans are domesticated (usually)
Is there only one of it?
Bren: Yes.
Raak: No.
LG: Sometimes.
all: No -my ex-wife wasn't!
BM: No.
Do most people have one?
I did say usually
Would most people want one?
Is it used for entertainment?
all: Hard to say, I have one.
BM see above.
GL: No
GL: Don't go there ;-)
Do you keep yours at home?
Go where?
GL: Yes
Do you use it every day?
Is it some form of communications device?
Sorry to interrupt AVMA for a moment, but since [Software]'s definitely reading this: gigni de nihilo ... over on MCiOS is a reverse game. The idea is that if you read the game backwards, it'll all make sense. This means that new moves have to be consistent with what's already been said "in the future". So, for example, fairly early in the game you'll find Blob saying "[Néa] To answer you question - not recently I'm afraid, the last time was on the East London Line between Shadwell & Wapping." and then later on Néa asking "Incidentally, did anybody here ever pull the emergency brake while drunk?", setting up Blob's answer. As far as I can tell, you've been playing it forwards all along -- hence all the comments about you developing precognition and so on, which are an attempt to make your comments make sense in the context of the reverse flow.
BM: Clue, perhaps - Most days.
Brendan: :-*
Is it a personal organiser?
A toothbrush?
Following Brendan's Comments above
Software re: The Reverse Crescent Game in MCiOS. Yup - because you seemed to 'pick' on me nearly every time you posted something, you completely f*cked up my gameplan. I left loads of messages for you - so did Darren - and others dropped hints. Eventually I gave up and dropped out of the game :-(
Is it a spinning around clothes drying thing?
...back to the game
Is it a toilet brush?
ZK: No
Toby: No.

Chalks: My humblest appologies :-o , I was completely off the scent on that one :-/ , sorry to spoil your fun, I'll stick to the things I know best in future.

Chalks: No & No.

A cuddly toy?
[S'ware] apology accepted :-)
Is it related to sex?
Ok, everything could be related to sex, but some things are more closely related than others.
Is it a pharisee?
Chalks: No, this is not the generation game :O).
Raak: Unlikely - but, hey, whatever turns you on ;-)
Chalks: No, it is Mineral with Animal connections, remember.
A penguin [bar]?
doggy widdle?
sorry - just remembered it's mineral with animal connections
Is it something one enjoys using?
Chalks ;-))
Raak: Not particularly, unless one had such a fettish.
Is it a hoover?
Bren: No.
A toothbrush?
A K-Tel nose hair trimmer?
A razor?
Also based on the assumption that disposables are made of metal and plastic to shave the human animal and they often come in the "electrical" variety - and blokes tend to use them daily or almost as often, with girls slightly less often needing a boyfriend at this time of night declared
Could you lift it with one hand?
[ZK] Awww... maybe you should use that K-Tel nose hair trimmer a little more frequently... ;-)
Have you died?
[Breadmaster] They don't make industrial strength ones, you see :)
Back from a relaxing weekend without a PC in my face.
Raak: No.
ZK: No & No.
BM: Yes (in most cases).
ZK: No.
Is it computerised?
Why is this such a boring one?
Can we have a clue?
Chalks: Because nobody has asked the right questions.
all: Yes, I'm getting bored too. You probably have several of these about the office/college/school.
Is it a telephone?
A stapler?
First thing on my desk that I saw ...
I know what's bugging me about this one - the 'animal' connection .... what does 'connection' actually mean? Is there a bit of animal in it? or is used by an animal [in this case human]? If it's the latter, isn't it rather superfluous and misleading to add the animal bit?
GL: No.
Bren: No, but you are now on the right tack.
Chalks: In this case the human connection is that this object would be unable to perform any function without human assistance.
Hole punch?
Ring binder?
Is it human-powered?
all - has it! Cheers and whoops from audience!

Over to you all!

At f*r*i*g last!
This one is an ANIMAL, and hopefully will be easier to guess
Human animal?
Come on now, it wasn't that difficult!
[Software] Yes - It took a long time to work out, that makes it difficult
Alive?
IMO
[S'ware] The 'Animal' part was superfluous and misleading. Many examples of this type of equipment have been posted as the 'object' in the past - simply as Mineral. You replied to my earlier question [and I quote] "Because nobody has asked the right questions." I completely disagree.
[Kim] No
Brutus? (of "et tu" fame)
'cos it's always fun to start with a completely random guess.
A certain individual animal?
Chinese?
Well, it's a one in five chance!?
Did they die before 1900?
Male?
[Brenda] No - but it was worth a shot
[Raak] Yes - an individual dead human (see above)
[Tuj] No
[Ink] Yes
[Snodster] No - I'm fairly certain she wasn't
Were they born before 1500?
[Inkspot] No
Religious figure?
Was he a scientist?
[Brendan] No
[Inkspot] No, and as said before not a 'he'
Joan of Arc?
[Software] No, Joan of Arc was born before 1500
Mary Shelley?
Just testing ;)
[Inkspot] No
Was she born before 1800?
[Inkspot] Yes
Is she an author?
Elizabeth I?
Was she a religious figure?
[Inkspot] She isn't. She wasn't famous for being an author.
[Raak] No, but you're think on the right lines.
[Kim] See the answer I gave when Brendan asked that.
[Raak] I meant thinking not think obviously
Mary, Queen of Scots?
[snorgle] No
Was she European, other than British?
[Inkspot] No
Was she a royal of some description?
just trying to clarify what "along the right lines" means (couldn't be Queen V herself, of course, since she died in 1901 ...)
Was she associated with royalty, without being royalty herself?
Lady Jane Grey
[Brendan] Yes (It also couldn't be Queen V because she wasn't born before 1800)
[Raak] At one time
[Inkspot] No.
If not an author, a diarist Elizabeth Pepys?
Nell Gwynne?
[Inkspot] No.
[Kim] No.
One of Henry VIII's wives?
Queen Anne?
[all] For some reason I read the wrong answer, and thought you'd said "No" to born pre-1800 ... Doh!
Mary wife of William III (of Orange)?
[Raak] Yes
[Braendan] You are so very close - We can all make mistakes
[Inkspot] No
Anne Boleyn?
[Brendan] Yup.

Audience - Cheers and Adulation for Brendan
OK, let's have a MINERAL/VEGETABLE (with ABSTRACT overtones). If it becomes obvious that this classification is confusing people, I'll give some pointers ...
Is it made of wood?
And metal?
A painting?
Is the vegetable, paper?
[all] in part, but probably not a large part (NB: I am considering "made of wood" to mean dead wood in some way arranged by humans; ie in my definition a tree is not "made of wood" -- which I admit is eccentric)
[Software] probably in places, but it's not a major component
[Raak] No, but keep plugging at why it has abstract overtones
[Inkspot] No.
Half a dead cow in formaldehyde?
Is the vegtable part a tree?
Oops, ignore my last, dead cow isn't mineral or vegetable.
Half a dead tree in formaldehyde?
Is it unique?
[Raak] No, in either case. [all] Not "a" tree. [Inkspot] Yes.
Hyde Park?
Does the vegetable part involve more than one tree?
Is it a geographical landmark?
Is it a work of art?
[all] No.
[GL] Yes!
[Inkspot] No.
[Raak] The "it" you are looking for isn't, but a work of art (in the broadest sense) is involved.
Is it a forest?
Is it a real place mentioned in literature like Sherwood Forest?
[Tuj] Yes, but not just that.
[Inkspot] You're getting very close, but the answer to that particular question is No.
Is it the Hundred Acer Wood?
Is it Mirkwood?
Fangorn Forest?
The Forest Moon of Endor?
stop looking at me like that!
[Gusset] No.
[snorgle]No.
[Breadmaster] Nope.
[all] Nope!
All good guesses, but remember it isn't just a forest.
Is it from LOTR?
Under Milk Wood?
Not Forest Gump either then
Can it move around?
Burnham Wood?
[Gusset] No.
['spot] No.
[Breadmaster] No.
[all] No.
When I say it's not just a forest, I mean there's other stuff too, not that it's a special sort or specific example of a forest. The trees are definitely a major component of the mystery item, but perhaps not the one people immediately think of.
The Eden Project?
The Angel of the North?
Is it fictional?
[Bm] No.
[Raak] No.
Because ... [Tuj] Yes!
Babylon 5?
Is it from a film like the 'Valley Forge' in Silent Running?
The forest referred to in the phrase "Can't see the forest for the trees"?
Is the fictional setting concerned a movie?
[Raak] No.
[Inkspot] No.
[snorgle] No, it is from a specific work.
[ZK] No, not a movie.
Is it a city?
The Forbidden Forest from Harry Potter which is based on the Forest of Dean?
[all] No, but it is within/near one.
[Inkspot] No.
The Hanging Gardens Of Babylon?
Central Park?
Is it from a book?
[snorgle] I've made mistakes with these things before, but are you sure Central Park contains a forest? and is fictional?
Is it an old oak tree with a yellow ribbon tied around it?
[GL] I don't think the Hanging Gardens were fictional either, although not much is known about them.
[BM] There's no proof that it ever existed apart from a book written by someone who never went within a hundred miles of the area it was rumoured to be. But I take your point
Was the book written after 1900?
Nottingham Forest?
I know Sherwood was mentioned earlier but Notts Forest are a fictional entity, ie they are alledged to be footballers - but nice people all the same who always invite me to their end of season party in January each year.
[Gusset] No.
[snorgle] Alas, too real.
[all]Erm. The work in question is commonly found in books but it is not a book per se. Does that make sense?
[Breadmaster] No.
[Inkspot] No (bearing in mind the above caveats about the phrase "the book").
[Snodgrass] LOL. No.
PS [Snodgrass] Are you also alleging that all the players are vegetables? ;)
Was the book written before 1980?
bearing in mind the above caveats about the phrase "the book"
I meant 1880!
Is it from a poem?
Is it from a play?
Utopia?
[GL] Yes, before 1880.
[Inkspot] Indeed it is. Therefore ...
[Raak] No.
[all] No.
Herot?
Xanadu?
I mean, of course, the location of Kubla Khan's pleasure dome, and not the improbably awful film starring Olivia Newton John and Gene Kelly. On roller skates. In pink. With the Electric Light Orchestra.
[Gusset] No.
[Breadmaster] DING! DING! DING! Yes! It was indeed those twice five miles of fertile ground, with walls and towers girdled round, forests ancient as the hills, gardens bright with sinuous rills, etc. etc. Congratulations. The floor is yours.
Huzzah!
Give me a few moments to thing of something sufficiently fiendish.
ABSTRACT
OK, let's see how this plays out.
Is it an emotion?
[ZK] Nope.
Is it a human concept?
[ZK] No - although some may be involved.
Can it be detected with any of the senses?
[Brendan] An interesting question. I would say technically no, but your senses might well alert you to its presence.
Is it a natural event or happening?
Is it a naturally occurring phenomenon?
Dooo-dooo do-doodoo...
The monster under the bed?
[Inkspot] No.
[Tuj] No.
[Raak] No, that's very much ANIMAL.
I should warn you all that I'm not at work today and tomorrow and my internet access is currently a little erratic, so many apologies if there are gaps between my answers... I shall do my best though!
Is it existence?
straight in with a random guess
Is it a phrase or expression?
Does it have to do with the passage of time?
Is it connected with the supernatural
(Brendan: All footballers get covered in mud, Vegetables grow in the soil (ok not all so sue me!), therefore all footballers............. eat vegetables and you are what you eat. And Forest are neither Super nor Natural before you ask - C'mon you R's)
Is it electricity?
[Snodgrass] Your mastery of syllogism is unmatched!
[all] No.
[Inkspot] No.
[Kim] No.
[Snodgrass] Aha! Yes.
[Brendan] No.
A ghost?
Banquo's Ghost?
An Orb?
To those of you without Living TV you have been spared the antics of Derek Acorah and Yvette Fielding chasing ghosts and flying balls of light around the country and having theatrical panic attacks as they go. What a rich cultural medium digital TV can be!
A poltergeist?
[Raak] No.
[GL] No.
[Snodgrass] No, and I thank you for that terrifying vignette. Yvette Fielding?!
[all] No.
Possession of some sort [by the devil or his disciples]?
[Chalky] No.
Is it related to some sort of concept of the afterlife?
A magic spell?
ah...Raak may have pre-empted my next line of questioning ... is it Black Magic?
I don't have a suggestion
[Snodgrass] I happen to like that programme!
backtracking in realisation
Not that believe it all, you understand!
Voodoo ?
[ZK] Sorry, no offence intended. I quite enjoy it too, in small measure, but the histrionics do rather detract from what might, otherwise, be a serious attempt to uncover something we understand little about. Did you watch the celebrity version last weekend?
[Brendan] Yes.
[Raak] Nope.
[Chalky] Not that either.
[Snodgrass] Nope. How do you have a celebrity ghost-chasing programme? Were they hunting Elvis, James Dean, Buddy Holly etc?
Is it re-incarnation ?
[Breadmaster] The celebs were doing the hunting - or more accurately staying 2 nights in a spooky castle and having the willies put up them so to speak (but thats one for a different channel I expect). You know, I'm a Celebrity - Get 8 shades of wos'name out of me!
I despair of modernity...
[Snodgrass] Nope.
[Snodgrass] Sadly not, as I only have Sky when I'm living at home.
Transubstantiation?
is it Hell?
Valhala?
The Holy Spirit?
Is the afterlife in question the Christian one?
Nirvana?
Purgatory?
Would a river be pertinent?
[Raak] No.
[all] No.
[GL] No.
[Brendan] No.
[Kim] No.
[Raak] No.
[Dujon] It wouldn't.
Don't get too hung up on the afterlife thing - it's only related to it.
Is it a Philosophy?
[GL] It might be, depending on how you define "philosophy".
Is it a fear?
[Inkspot] No.
Is it a religion?
[all] A breakthrough! Yes.
Catholicism?
blimey - I thought we'd eliminated the 'religion' thing ages ago - perhaps I just imagined it!
[Chalky] No. No, I was surprised no-one tried that earlier, but they didn't...
Buddism?
Islam?
I meant buddhism, obviously
A religion is a philosophy, unless your a fanatic.
[GL] No. There's more to religion than philosophy, though - it is a sociological phenomenon which may include a philosophy, but also other things such as liturgy. I think.
[all] Nope.
theophobia?
[Inkspot] No, but I'd love to know more about the Theophobic Church...
Does it profess to be some variety of the Christian religion?
[Raak] It does not.
Scientology?
[BM]The basis of all religion is a philosophy, which is also the most important part of the religion. It's easy to quote (for example) the Bible but very few of those that do make any effort to love their fellow man.
[GL] Of course, it depends on what you mean by "philosophy". But if you mean ethics, I still say that's only one element of religion, and not necessarily the most important part: for example, Jesus taught ethics, but he seems to have been more interested in eschatology. One should always be very wary of saying things like "the essence of all religions is X" because religions are rather complex things that vary greatly.
Oh yes. No.
Is it monotheistic?
[Raak] Largely, but it's a matter of some debate.
Is it Hindu?
[BM] Philosophy generally means an outlook or set of beliefs that underpin your thinking. An ethical philosophy is only one example of this cynical philosophies have more appeal but are less used by religions. But all religions are in essence telling people how they should think (not what they should think, just how).
Eschatology is part of the philosophy of most religions
[GL] It is not.
I take your point, although I think you're defining "philosophy" a little loosely.
Was it founded in the last 200 years?
[Brendan] Nope.
Sikhism?
Philosophy
noun: any personal belief about how to live or how to deal with a situation (Example: "Self-indulgence was his only philosophy")
noun: the rational investigation of questions about existence and knowledge and ethics
noun: a belief (or system of beliefs) accepted as authoritative by some group or school
[GL] Still so.
By which I meant, of course, still no.
Is it a brand of islam?
Judaism?
[all] No.
[GL] No.
Is it extant?
It it a associated with the far east?
Is it Zen?
[Raak] It is.
[Inkspot] Not the far east, no.
[GL] It is not.
Just confirm it's from the middle east? but not connected with Islam?
[GL] Two questions shock! Yes, it is from the Middle East, and there may be connections with Islam, but if so I think they're likely to be pretty indirect.
It can only be a matter of time now.
Was it founded by a swordsman called Zoro his adventures later being made into numerous films?
[Inksopt] No, but it should have been, hence...
Is it Sufism? -Apologies for joining in so abruptly
[Phahad] Feel free to join in, but no - it's not Islam, remember.
Is it popular outside the middle east?
[Gusset] If this religion is defined a little broadly, I believe that today it does have more adherents outside the Middle East than it has within it.
Taoism?
[all] No.
You know, I really think Inkspot will get it...
Zoroastrianism?
(I may have spelt that wrong)
Zoroism?
simulpost....and Brendam beat me to it *laughs*
I meant BrendaN of course *laughs again*
[Brendan] YES! And I believe you spelt it entirely correctly.
Having recently had a go, I'm entirely happy to cede in favour of either Inkspot, who clearly had it and was just messing around, or Chalks, who I simulposted. That said, I do have a particularly silly idea for a round ... I'll leave it a few hours and if neither of those two starts one I will.
Pah! I'd have won it if it hadn't been for those pesky kids!
applause and cheers
A good win and well set by the Breadmaster.
Silly idea
OK, then, my silly idea: bifurcated AMVA. I've got two separate "objects" in mind which can be referred to by the same word(s). Hence, for each question I'll give two answers, one for the first object and one for the second, eg "Is it made of wood?" "Yes/No" Hope that makes sense.
So, the objects are ANIMAL/ANIMAL.
Is it a quagga?
Leaf?   OK, just a mad guess.   :-(
However, is that the idea, Brendan?
Is either human?
An interesting conceit!
A mammal?
Bigger than a Coconut?
[Raak] No/no.
[Dujon] No/no.
[Bm] Yes/Yes.
[Inkspot] Yes/Yes (see above).
[Snodgrass] Yes/Yes. (Unless it's a giant mutant coconut you have in mind)
Are they particular humans (as opposed to a type, job, class etc)?
Interesting - looks like we have two people with the same name, or perhaps similar titles?
Is the name for either an occupation?
[Breadmaster] Yes/Yes
[snorgle]No/No
Are they male?
Are they still alive?
Englebert Humperdinck?
Are they British?
[Breadmaster] Yes/Yes.
[Raak] Yes/No.
[Bigsmith] No. (Good guess though!)
[Inkspot] Yes/No.
Male?
[Brendan] Thanks, I thought it an apt guess after his/their appearance in an earlier game!
Jerry Hall?
One's an American model, the other an Irish guy I used to work with.
Obviously not as neither are British, and both are still alive - sorry, somehow transposed the answers in my tiny mind...
Are they nobility?
[Bigsmith] Er, yes and the male I already answered to Breadmaster's last Q.
[Breadmaster] Ooh, excellent question! No/Yes
Winston Churchill?
Is the Dead one the Noble one?
[Brendan] I can assure you that my coconuts are not mutant or deformed in any way!
(Bod No2) Is he an American?
Are they actors?
Assuming that Brendan always refers to them in the same order, it looks like one is alive, British, and not noble, while the other is dead, not British, and noble. I think.
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