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Animal-Vegetable-Mineral-Abstract: The Pants Memorial Game
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The chairperson selects an object/idea/whatever and announces whether it's animal, vegetable, mineral, and/or abstract. The others have to ask questions to figure out what it is. Whomever guesses the object correctly is given the chair for the next round; repeat ad nauseam.
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Sorry I'm late!
[Breadmaster] I would say the average 10 year-old would not know about this.
[Raak] In the broadest sense, yes.
[Toby] Please clarify, or give an example.
[Chalky] Yes. Sorry, I was out of commission yesterday.
Is it closely related to ISIHAC, in anything less than the broadest sense?
Ah. A meta-abstraction, really, such as: "Das Ding an sich", existential Angst, Jeffersonian democracy...
Is it, in your opinion, a positive thing?
[Toby] Das Ding an sich was of course Kant's attempt to write a Christmas carol - not sure why it never caught on.
[Raak] No.
[Toby] Ahhh, I see. No.
[Breadmaster] In my opinion it can only either be both positive and negative, or neither.
Is it Occam's Razor?
Which is of course related to the current festive season in that the introduction of the assumption of the existence of Father Christmas is a necessary premise; and is also of course pure fiction.
[Breadmaster] I thought it did - Ding, an sich, Dingalingaling - which was subsequently corrupted by the uncomprehending rabble.
[Toby] No.
[All] *Clue* It may help to think along the lines of Raak's first question, omitting the word "festive".
The 28th of December?
Is it a calender event ? eg winter solstice?
Toby] I liked Chuck Berry's version!
Is it weather-related?
[Inkspot] I think you're the only person who did!
A white 28th of December?
[Inkspot] *Sporadic applause from the audience.* Strong calendar association, but not a solstice, nor an equinox.
[Breadmaster] No.
[Raak] No.
Is it a Bank Holiday?
The Eve of the New Year?
Your birthday?
Back to work!
[Chalky] No.
[Toby] *More applause*. No. It is not a calendar event as such, but something that has an association with that particular calendar event.
[Inkspot] No, but thank you for thinking of me.
A resolution?
[Breadmaster] No.
A Burns Supper?
[Raak] No.
Sylvester? Hogmanay? A kiss at midnight?
Or would that last one be 'animal'?
[Toby] None of the above.
[All] I'm getting concerned that if we get too far into this month, my choice will cease to be aposite. There is one very popular question arising out of "abstract" that has not yet been asked.
Is it an action?
And if so, is it first-footing?
[Breadmaster] No, not an action.
Is it a human concept?
Is it getting to second base on first date?
Obviously very important during the winter and broadly fictional though more mythical to some.
First footing?
Hogwatch?
Is it an anthropomorphisation?
[Chalks] No.
[Raak] No.
[Toby] Yes! *Applause*
Jack Frost?
So I guess that's a yes to mine too!
The old guy with the '2003' banner stumbling out on his cane while the little '2004'-bannered baby crawls in?
Is there a name for that?
[snorgle] No. But yes to your previous. Apologies for missing it.
[Toby] No, and I have no idea what that is called, but you are getting closer.
[Inkspot] Apologies for missing your earlier post. Nice, but no.
Janus?
Is it a tall dark man carrying coal?
Or some such thing.
Hallelujia!
[Raak] Yes! The answer is the god JANUS. The kissing stool to Raak with compliments.
[Dazed5] Sorry, we have gas.
A blind guess, after having been sure snorgle must have had it with Jack Frost.

The next object is ANIMAL, with ABSTRACT connections.

A brontosaurus?
HE-HE-HEM. I have a theory...
[Toby] No.
Is it an actual animal, known to exist or to have existed in the past?
That's an "A-N" not "A-N-N-E" animal.
[Kim] An actual entity classed as ANIMAL, yes.
Is it a person?
I'll up my number of guesses once I'm back at work tomorrow;)
Is it extinct?
[Inkspot] Yes.
[Tuj] Not applicable, given that it's a person.
Is the person living?
[Bm] No.
Is it Mark Rothko, or another abstract artist?
Is it Mark Rothko, or another abstract artist?
[momus] Neither Mark Rothko, not any other abstract artist.
s/not/nor/
Is it a real person who has been 'fictionalised'?
"fictionalised" is almost the word I mean, someone who lived but their life has been 'embroidered' like Robin Hood or King Arthur, but not mythical.
Is it a scientist?
[Inkspot] No.
[Toby] Ah. Um. There is room for multiple opinions and flame-wars on that topic.
Was he Italian?
Nostradamus?
Von Danniken? (sp?)
that was a triple simulpost
Urrgh
He's still alive. I think ... please ignore. (More elbow jogging, Chalky! Sorry.)
Sigmund Freud?
And is he, in fact, a he?
Paracelsus?
Leonard of Quirm?
[Inkspot] No.
[Chalky] No.
[Dujon] No. (And he isn't still alive, according to a previous answer.)
[Toby] No, yes.
[Bm] No.
[Kim] No.
Was he' alive' before 1800 BC
... perhaps we should nail the time of this slightly abstracted chappie.
L. Ron Hubbard
I've no idea if he's dead yet, but there ya go.
Has he given name to theory/principle/law?
Has he given name to theory/principle/law?
oops!
half ten...phew...time for a cuppa tea
[Chalky] Yes.
[Thrax] No.
[Inkspot] No.
Was he alive before 1000AD?
The late and, IMHO, not enormously great L. Ron Hubbard died in 1986. His spirit is probably floating around near us as we speak.
Was he an astronomer?
back refreshed and ready for more of the same till lunchtime
[Bm] Yes.
[Inkspot] No.
Was he recognised as a philosopher?
[Dazed5] Yes!
Plato?
Aristotle?
[Inkspot] No.
[Chalky] Bullseye!
My toast lands on the floor jam side down aswell!

[Irkspot] Er, right
And cats always land on their feet. So if you strap a piece of toast and jam to the back of a cat....
Goddammit! I'm curious why it would be considered controversial to call Aristotle a scientist. He did, after all, pretty much invent biology.
Freakout
He didn't invent my biology. I'm fairly certain that two sexually-inclined Yorkshirepersons were responsible for my spawning. I believe they were doing their service to the nation, in an attempt to prevent us from being outnumbered by the Germans, as is the time-honoured custom in this fair land of ours.
[Bm] A scientist by the standards of the time, maybe.
getting a word in edgeways ...
Ooh - that was lucky. It's ages since I had a turn in the chair. I'm office based for the next few days, so will try to keep it simple:
M I N E R A L with 'vegetable' connections . . .
Yukon gold potatoes?
And I see the boys are at it again ;-) Maybe we need a Jesting Pilate game for the what is art/what value philosophy/science to whom/why a duck? discussions?
Is it art?
[Toby] Great idea - in the unlikely event of my starting a band, our first album will now be called Jesting Pilate.
Is it "The Potato Eaters?"
I forget which artist painted it. I like the sound of a band though. I always wanted to be in a band when I were a lad. Unfortunately I have no musical talent whatsoever. (Cries) I can't read write or play music to save me life, though I'd be at home on the mic, butchering Pink Floyd tracks and pretending I was doing them justice.
Toby - No
Breadmaster - No, not really
Thrax - No
Is it something I could go and see today?
[Thrax] When I was a student I had a burning ambition to start a band called Asymmetrically Repulsive and release an album entitled Messianic Duck. Like you, I was hampered by an actively negative musical ability, being semi-tone deaf. One day, though...
Is it made of stone?
I was a drummer in a rock band for a while. We were originally going to call ourselves Thundering Imbeciles but settled, in the end, on Barok. Well, it was 25 years ago...
Is it unique?
Is it made from metal?
Is it an article of cutlery?
apologies for delay
Breadmaster - Yes
Kim - No
Dazed - No
Inkspot - Metal, yes, and other stuff
Raak - No
[I may not be able to get back here before 6pm. Keep piling on the guesses - it's quite straightforward].
Is it a kitchen device like a breadmaker or kettle?
Is it a kitchen non-device like a baking tray or a pan?
Would it commonly be considered a household item?
Is it larger than a microwave oven?
Inkspot - No
Raak - No
B'master - Yes [and could be found in a kitchen]
Software - No
Is it a tool, in the conventional sense, that is?
Is it for gardening?
Is it a Garlic Crusher?
Software - No
Raak - No [although I suppose it could be found in a garden]
momus - if I'm not mistaken, a garlic crusher is a kitchen device [but of course, you may use one for entirely different purposes :-)
Is it for woodworking?
Raak - No
Would it be connected to a particular household area?
Is it powered by either batteries or mains electricity?
Tuj - Not really
Inkspot - YES!
Is it an electric pencil-sharpener?
Raak - No :-)
whilst this sounds cheap I can assure you that some are rather pricey..is it a lazy cucumber styled dildo?
Is the vegetable connection wood?
B'master - Yes, on most occasions [from what I can ascertain]
A paper shredder
Is it usually always switched on?
eg a radio could be but is not usually
Is it used for entertainment?
Would most homes in this country probably have one?
sorrysorrysorry
Eek - I thought I'd replied to the first 3 questions above at about 3pm... I'm so sorry, I must have left it on preview. To repeat:
Raak - No
Inkspot - Not always ... and a *'hearty cheer* for a superb example. SO close!
Dazed - YES!
Breadmasterly person - Not yet ;-)
A digital radio?
Grow-lights for growing pot?
A five-speed walking stick?
Digital wallpaper?
An intelligent door?
He may be Dazed [& Confused] but he's SPOT ON!
Well done Dazed - DAB it is - and very much on my mind as the grateful recipient of such a wondrous beast this Christmas [Pure Evoke 1]. I think Bob's got the same toy :-)
Inkspot - commiserations ...
... and apologies to all for being so busy just at the wrong time - which rather lost the momentum of the game.
What were the wooden vegetable connections?
Garden path's come to mind, Chalks.
Amazement
Here we go...next one is Abstract with Animal connections.
Is it a fictional character from a book?
Is it an action?
Standard secondary opener number 3.
Is it an animal of legend?
Is it evolution?
Is it a feeling/emotion?
Inkspot, no.
Breadmaster, no.
Kim,no.
Raak,no.
Bigsmith,no.
Is it a metaphorical or similitudinous concept?
E.g. wily as a fox, the owl of wisdom, etc.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAZED :-)
Backtracking ...
[Raak] Digital radios - most of the popular new models [including mine] are in a nice wooden casing. I dare say there are some that are NOT, which is why I qualified my reply to B'master. It was there for all to read.
[Software] Erm ... don't understand your comment. Surely you're not implying I led you up the garden path? And why the apostrophe?
Can it be seen?
Thanks Chalky...although I am only a day older than I was yesterday...:)
Raak, no.
Inkspot, not in the form that I am thinking.
Can it be experienced directly by any of the sense?
Ibid, yes it certainly can.
Can it be heard?
Is it something experienced by only an individual?
[Chalks] it is a grocer's apostrophe (see Eats, Shoots and Leaves).
Inkspot, yes.
Softers, it is experienced by everyone
Is it a fart?
The sound of a cheetah breathing noisily through its nose while tucking into the antelope it ha just run down?
Bigsmith, no.
Raak, good guess but no.
Is it connected with the weather?
It's raining here again, well more like indecisive drizzle really.
Inkspot, nothing to do with weather.
Can it also be seen, touched, tasted and smelled?
... collectively or severally
Is the animal connection human?
Chalky, none of those, it can only be heard (in this form).
Raak, yes.
Is it a song?
Kim - YES
Does the Animal connection form part of the title/subject?
Is it a pop song?
Or possibly from an opera?
Chalky, no. The animal connection is purely because it is written and performed by humans.
Toby, no and no
Does it date from before the last century?
What I mean is, there are 'original' recordings by the Beatles but not 'original' recordings of say Handel.
Is there an 'original ' recording?
Tuj, yes it does.
Inkspot, I do not think there is an original recording of this.
Is it from before the 19th century?
Raak, no. I believe it was written late 19th century.
Does it have a patriotic flavour?
Chalks, no.
Is it a hymn?
Inkspot, no.
Is it a song everybody knows?
Like Happy Birthday or Auld Lang Syne.
Is it written in, or usually sung in English?
"The Last Rose of Summer"?
Toby YES...it is the song..Happy Birthday to You..and with that..over to you
Ah, gosh. Gee. I'm overwhelmed.

OK, here we go. Common-or-garden ABSTRACT, she says.
Is it fictional?
Is Toby a woman too? Goodness, I'm getting confused now.
Would this be a purely human trait?
Me too, BM. I'm fairly sure that I was the one who treated nights as a lady in the MCiOS chat room - mind you, no-one bothered to disillusion me.
Is it capable of being experienced through one or more of the senses?
[Breadmaster] No. And yes. No confusion intended ;-)
[Dujon] No.
[Kim] No.
Is it a depiction of a person?
No.
Is it something mathematical?
[Raak] Yes.
Is it some kind of law?
[Breadmaster] Not so much. No one ever talks about 'the law of this-particular-thing' in the way they would refer to 'the law of gravity.' But it is a reflection of a truth.
Is it pi?
Is it zero?
Is it logic?
Is it a theorem?
Is it a saying or experssion? ie stitch in time saves nine
Yes, Bigsmith, it is indeed &pi!
And with that, over to you.
Oh Bugger
I'm not really going to be around enough to take the chair here (those ex-Pants-o-Philes may remember I was in the chair when Pants MC went belly-up, and I was annoying every one then with my slow responses). May I suggest Inkspot takes up the challenge as he/she was so close with Chalky's radio.
A Welshman in exile
Bigsmith, thank you, I am honoured indeed by your invitation, and I'm sure that despite the rumours, the demise of Pants MC wasn't totally your fault. ;)

mmmmm by 'ere I'd say Mineral .

Is the mineral metalic?
Sotware; No
Is it a specific item made of this mineral?
Is it plastic?
Kim] Yes
Raak]No
Is it an item made of stone or rock?
Earthenware?
Kim]Yes
Raak]No
Is it a geographical feature?
Is it a gnomon?
Worth a throw;)
Breadmaster] *a slight murmur from the audience* No
Tuj]No, an interesting guess, I'll tell you why later.Stonehenge came from quarries near here
Does this thing stay in one place?
Is it man-made?
Is there more than one of these things?
Breadnaster]Yes, definitely.
Toby]Yes
sorry simulpost there
plump]Yes and No
Stonehenge?
Would this be a monument?
Is it a building?
Toby]No
Dujon]Yes
Breadmaster}No
Is it Cleopatra's Needle?
Come to that, is it in Britain?
Breadmaster]1.No 2.Yes
Is it the Cenotaph?
In England?
Bigsmith] No
Software] No, and I'll be sending a raiding party for your sheep later.
Is it in South Wales?
snorgle]*excited clapping* yes
Is it a prehistoric monument?
Cardiff Docks?
Swansea Docks?
Milford Haven Docks?
Raak]YES *almost there*
Bigsmith]No
Bigsmith]No
Bigsmith]No, my bedroom widow used to look out over Milford docks, towards the BP and Texaco refineries.
Crick Barrow?
There's quite a few prehistoric monuments in South Wales.
[Inkspot] Why, did she enjoy the view?
To the hills!
Raak]No. There is a hidden clue in my reply to Tuj which may help with the location.
Raak]...curses foiled again!
Harolds Stones?
If you're wondering why - look here.
snorgle]No, not a stone circle, try further west.
clue: This early Neolithic ancient monument was built for a purpose which we kmow for certain, and is one of the best examples of its kind in the U.K.
Was it built as a tomb?
Was it built to make astronomical observations?
Given the earlier mention of gnomons...
Is it on the Gower Peninsula?
Raak]Yes; Burial tomb or cromlech
Raak] No; Stonehenge being the tenuous link, the stones came from the Preseli hills 200 miles away *hint*? extra points will be awarded for guessing how they got them there, and we all know what points mean.
Bigsmith]No; further west
Pembrokshire blue stone?
stoking up the Aga
Software]Yes; It is in the Preseli Hills, Pembrokeshire and made from blue stone
Pentre Ifan?
Just google-guessing...
Cooking with gas
Raak] Yeeeeeeessssssssss, on the button, well done Raak, an excellent guess.

that was educational to me as to what not to chose or almost risk killing the game

The next item is MINERAL.
Are we moving away from stone?
....and towards metal?
Plastic, anyone?
Is it a gnomon?
Maybe some day this'll be a standard opening question for Mineral.
Is it heterogeneous?
i.e., metal and plastic?
Is it a(n) household item?
[Software] Yes.
[Kim] Yes, almost entirely.
[Breadmaster] Not to any significant degree.
[Tuj] No.
[Toby] Somewhat, but primarily metal.
[Dujon] No.
Is it manufactured?
[Dujon] Yes.
Does it use either battery or electrical mains power?
refreshed by sleep and with my morning cup of tea at the ready
[Inkspot] Ah...yes, it does actually. (This is a Misleading Answer.)
Is it a battery?
[Software] No.
Am I likely to possess one?
Is it made for a specific purpose?
Despite not being a(n) household item (per Dujon), is it nonetheless most likely to be found in the home?
[Bm] It's unlikely, but not impossible.
[Inkspot] Yes.
[Kim] No. It will never be found in the home.
Does it use solar panels to collect energy to move around?
[Inkspot] No.
A particle accelerator?
Just a wild guess that popped into my head.. :-)
[snorgle] No.
Will it never be found in the home because it's too big to fit?
Or maybe because it has to be outside?
Does it need to be switched on to perform its function?
Toby stole my question :)!
Would it be used by a mechanic in a garage?
[Toby] Yes.
[Toby] It usually is.
[Tuj] Yes.
[Inkspot] No.
A searchlight?
All right, it's a wild guess. Well, a bit big for the home - usually uses its own generator (with batteries) - and so on.
[Dujon] No.
Do we want a hint yet?
Does it make something else?
Is it some sort of vehicle?
This seems unlikely, as Raak said Breadmaster was unlikely to have one, but I suppose it could be atank or something.
Would it be likely to be too expensive for the average household?
[Tuj] Actually I'm highly unlikely to own any kind of vehicle!
[Inkspot] No.
[Tuj] YES!
[Bm] Probably. Depends how wealthy the average household is.
Does it have wheels?
[Chalky] Some do.
That's assuming you mean, does it travel on wheels.
One of the Mars rovers?
[Toby] Good one, but no.
Could it legally go on the roads?
[Bm] Yes.
Is it a military vehicle?
Would the alternative to wheels be tracks?
[Inkspot] No.
[Dujon] Yes.
I'm not sure what you call them, but a 'bobcat' - i.e. a machine - often with a loader/digger in the front and often a hoe or similar on the back.
Bulldozer?
[plump] Close...
[Dujon] Yes! The word I had in mind was "backhoe", but you have the article.
Cheering audience lifts Dujon onto their shoulders and carries him around the room.
I've never heard either of those words. Do you mean a JCB?
[Bm] Well, JCB isn't the only firm that makes them, but yes.
*Takes embarrassed bow.*
I really had no intention of selecting the correct answer. I've done this before (when the Pants site was alive) - because I'm in a significantly different time zone to most participants it makes it awkward for everyone if I take the chair.
Accordingly I invite someone else to volunteer for the position ... perhaps, as Tuj got us on the right track (sorry) and Chalky the wheels/track, one of them might care to break the champagne and launch the next subject? Please!
Thanks Duj. Nice thought, but I don't feel I made a significant contribution. Perhaps Tuj would like a crack at the next one? If not - perhaps someone else is burning for a turn?
Noted
Fine, Chalky. I am unsure as to when Tuj normally posts but perhaps we could all wait until, say, 11;00 GMT on Monday (It's around 01:50 as I type) to allow time for a response. After that time I suggest the 'first in, best dressed' option be invoked.
Filling in space
[Breadmaster/Raak] On the 'bobcat' term: Yes, 'backhoe' is also used here. I suspect that 'bobcat' (well, I'm 90% sure) is a trade name - something like 'Biro' for a ballpoint pen, although the latter term does seem now to be fading somewhat.
Marking time
Well, neither Tuj nor anyone else has posted. I haven't had a go in the driving seat yet, because I'm not very good at guessing, but unless anyone objects I could have a go, if that's OK with Dujon et al...?
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