The meerkats over there with the voles are having a great party.

Klettern Sie jedes Gebirgssegel jedes Meer

The Jedi Gerbils Collective have just joined the party and are trying to convert the meerkats to Jedi-ism.

Si fallatis officium, quaestor infitias eat se quicquam scire de factis vestris

If you are attending the sexual needs of anyone important, ask how long it will take, if anyone knows where he is and whether it will ruin your clothes.

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Time warning: Competitors in this free-for-all MUST make their entries within a reasonable time. ZK came very close to having a substitute made ... please, all, take care with your timing - it is important to all parties (e.g. 7:30 for 8:00 means that I turn up at 9:00 so that I can watch everyone else make fools of themselves.)

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Huh? What did I do?

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Nuffin, apart from a 25 minute gap between answer/post; Anyhoo, never take anything here as personal, I simply have to prove that my existence is real and necessary. OK, where's the next party?

So, putting entries back where they belong:

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Dammit, where's Quentin? He was with us a moment ago... Oh hell, we didn't leave him on the iceberg, did we?

Wenn ich lächele, habe ich eine Öffnung voll der Zähne; wenn ich die Stirn runzele, bin ich nicht hier gleichmäßig.

When I cry, I have offal full of zithering. When my stern rumbles, I don't do any glassmaking here.

Pisteuomen eis hena Theon Patera pantokratora, panton oraton te kai aoraton poiten.
Pisteuomen eis hena kyrion Iesoun Christon, ton huion tou theou, gennezenta ek tou patros monogene, toutestin ek tes ousias tou patros, theon ek theou alethinou, gennethena, ou poiethenta, homoousion toi patgri de ou ta panta egeneto, ta te en toi ouranoi kai ta epi tes ton de hemas tous anthropous kai da ten hemeteran sotererian katelthonta kai sarkothenta kai enanthropesanta, pathonta, kai anasanta tei tritei hemera, kai anelthonta eis tous othranous, kai erchomenon krinai zontas kai nekrous.
Kai eis Hagion Pneuma.

The piston is in father's underwear drawer, the underwear is being aired outside. The piston is in Kylie's bosomy chest, a ton for him, a ton for you, knees up for your father's one-legged jeans, tested on the ooze of your father, you and you with the thin ale, old jeans, or poem-ends, your manly fluids [the remainder of the text describes acts of such depravity as to endanger the reader's virtue were they to be translated].

ipso facto

NHS waiting list for Hip Replacements

Het spijt me, ik spreek geen Engels

I hate spit, me, and that bloke off Vets in Practice said it was icky too.

longum iter atque molestum eos adhuc manebat.

It's a long time at the mausoleum for anyone to smack a lion on the head. (I don't know, these Romans are crazy)

Meenya yest tree syestree ee sobarka. Ya nye paneemaiyoo p'angleeski

*overcoming temptation to translate literally* My wooden sisters are mean bitches. It's true! They spread mayonnaise on my skis and broke them.

Holy crap! The pirates threw Dobby off our balcony!

Darling, the ant got loose in the inkwell again and this time he's having an epileptic fit.

mortam sic quisquam exhorruit

If you tell the truth, you are dead!

Je jamais, ne fais jamais cela.

Pyjamas! Nice pyjamas for sale!

Veuillez appeler le directeur, il y a une grenouille dans ma toilette.

Please call Mr Arkwright, Granville's been sick in my toilet.

Eustace? Is your family so large that it costs a pound just to say hello?

Il bugiardo vuola buona memoria.

His budgerigar stole a skeleton of mine from the Mines of Moria!

scriptus et in tergo necdum finitus Orestes?

This script is a like a terd down the neck, find the writers and arrest them!

Indem er seinen Mantel anzog und seinen Hut aufsetze, lief er aus dem Zimmer. Das Baden ist hier verboten

Sign the insurance form on the mantle; it insures your hut. Leaf through it and then boil it. Ignore the bad use of verbs.
Gott sei dank

God, I'm drunk!

Du! Deinen Kartoffelsalat ist sehr gemütlich!

Oi, you! I'm going to cart you off as a salad if your mutt does that again!

Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem

Ents do not breed beyond necessity.

Gutta cavat lapidem.

My guts are carving a hole in my lap

Uppror med hjälp av gerillaförband är den verkliga krigföringsmetoden

Doctors are in uproar over help given to a band of guerilla fighters at the vertical Toden Arakawa Line tram service in Tokyo.

Vera turn the light on first.

nix gigt's, fisch gibt's!

We are the knights who say Ni! We give you a herring with which to cut down the mightiest tree in this forest!

securus licet Aenean Rutulumque ferocem committas, nulli gravis est percussus Achilles aut multum quaesitus Hylas urnamque secutus

Sexy licences are available from the Ferocious Reticulan Anal committee, but these don't cover beating out people's brains or multiple quantum urn sucking.

Caro dio, sesso me del high. Vorrei credere nella vostra nota. Addestrilo prego calorosamente. Dio, uno da potere me da venire!

My dear, I want to join the mile high club. It will up my street cred and yours. You'll burn off calories! Dear, please, come with me a moment!!!! (said in increasingly desperate voice to an air steward before the passenger was arrested. In her defence, she said she meant she could eat a mile high club biscuit as she was hungry)

Varmista mukava matka: aja autosi junaan. Varaa paikkasi ajoissa