arrow_circle_left arrow_circle_up arrow_circle_right
King AVMA the III
help
Finally inheriting the title after 70 years.
arrow_circle_up
A Christmas tree?
In the UK?
In Australasia?
[tree?] No
[UK?] Yes
[Auz*] No
The Major Oak?
It's wooden, alive, quite large, not a Christmas tree, in the UK, nor a bush.
A fruit tree?
The remaining stump from the vandalised tree on Hadrian’s Wall?
(Is it still alive? I’ll defer to the arborists.)
[Major] No, but there's an ooo from the audience.
[fruity] No.
[stumpy] No.
Is it unusually old?
Is the tree not whole because of human intervention?
Forgot that it wasn't a whole tree...
Son of Royal Oak?
[old] Yes.
[intervention] No. Mutters from the audience over misleading answering, but the answer certainly isn't Yes.
[descendant] No.
Is its exact location a secret?
In England?
The blasted oak on the withered heath where the hags dance?
[Secret] No
[English] Yes
[Dance venue] No
Does it have an individual name?
Is it a tree?
[Individual name?] In the context I think you're asking, no.
[A tree] No.
In London?!
Is it outdoors?
[London] No.
[Outdoors] Yes.
Is it many trees?
[A f- many trees] Yes! Audience applause
I would love this to be the National Forest, which was on those brown signs as you went up the A38 north of Birmingham and could be seen as miles and miles of hedges and fields. But given the reaction to my Major Oak bid just before, I'll go for Sherwood Forest.
A winner
[Sherwood Forest] You divined the ooos correctly. It's Sherwood Forest.
Winner's comments
This was of course impossible without the help of some merry Morningtonians whom I would like to thank, and some unfeasibly good archery. So I accept this baton in the shape of an arrow and let us go on to what may be a quick round before Christmas. This one is:

MINERAL.

Is it Christmas-related?
Is it found on planet Earth?
Was it, until recently, not on planet Earth?
[T] Not Christmas-related.
[B] Yes, earthly.
[R] This has never left earth.
Is it unique OR does it begin with P?
Does it begin with P OR is it unique?
Delete as applicable
[C, T] No.
Man=made?
That is, man-made?
Is it smaller than a toaster OR is it bigger than a telephone box?
Has it existed for more than 100 years?
Is it typically powered by electricity?
Does its name end in 'ite'?
That'll eliminate a lot.
[R] Yes, man-made.
[C] Depends which dimensions you are talking about, both are true, and both false. Which Boolean operator that is, I don't know.
[T] It's electrically powered.
[S] Audience murmurs as the board displays "No".
Does its name rhyme with 'ite', or 'ites'?
[S] Applause as it is revealed that one of the words on the card does indeed rhyme with "ite" or "ites".
I have been informed that the Boolean operator referred to above is the UM operator, where any input can give any output.
Christmas lights?
My cat liked 'em.
[R] Not Christmas lights.
Can I buy it in a big Tesco?
Some sort of light or lights?
[G] No, not found in Tesco.
[R] Applause from the audience. Yes.
(signal-boosting Boolbar) Has it existed for more than 100 years?
[R'n'B] Missed that, the answer is Yes, accompanied by scattered applause.
Street lights?
[R] Much applause, though the answer is No.
Traffic lights?
Showing various colours?
[G] Yes! Audience goes wild for goldfinch.
[R] Also yes, but now no longer relevant.
So, goldfinch, take this multicoloured bayon, and, obeying the filter signals, turn right to greater things!
Oh heck, just what I wanted for Christmas. And what’s this? *rustling of wrapping paper* oh! It’s MINERAL
First things first, is it actually feasible to wrap?
[SM] Very much depends, but suffice to say that kind of undertaking would require significantly more than paper and sticky tape.
Is it an astronomical object?
[B] No
Is it radioactive?
A geographical feature?
[Rosie] *very appreciative crowd* Yes
[Raak] in that you’d put it on a map, yes
Sellafield, formerly Windscale?
The natural nuclear reactor discovered in Oklo?
[R/R] *hubbub dies down* No and no.
Is it underground?
[R] Not underground
Is it an element?
[B] No, it isn’t an element.
A hospital?
[R] Not a hospital
Is it a 'station' of some kind?
[SM] If it was then it isn’t anymore
Unique?
[CdM] By far the less deceptive answer is yes
Is it below the Earth's crust?
[T] Above the Earth's crust. Unless viewed from its antipodal point, of course, but let's not worry about that kind of pedantry.
Is it outside the UK?
[SM] Yes! Not in the UK.
Also, was probably a bit hedged with the station question. It was (part of) a ‘station’ of some kind.
Is it in Antarctica?
[R] It’s not in Antarctica.
Chernobyl?
Is it numbered?
[R/SM] yes to both! So…
Is it reactor no.4 at Chernobyl?
[SM] Indeed it is. So let’s carefully wrap that back up, with hope for a happy new year.
Ooh what's this? Such a fascinating ANIMAL.
Double points for getting it in Latin. Credit to Anna for the great idea.
A land animal?
Not a land animal.
Extinct?
Carduelis carduelis?
Does it begin with a proboscis?
[G] No
[T] No
[P] I don't think so.
Is the Latin a tautonym?
A creature of the waters?
[B]No.
[R]Yes.
A whale?
No, but getting warmer.
Anguilla anguilla?
Carcharodon carcharias?
Tursiops truncatus?
Banjos banjos banjos?
Which I think ought to be written "Banjos! Banjos! Banjos!"
[a.a.] No
[c.c.] No
[t.t.] No
[b.b.b.] No
You need to go deeper
A shark? (i.e. Sharcus sharcus)
Banjos! Banjos! Banjos! Banjos! ?
Bass?
A blobfish?
[Sharks, banjos, bass and blobfish] All no, I'm afraid.
Is this a vertebrate?
[vertebrate] No. audience applause
Does it have a central nervous system?
[nerves] Yes.
Is it sessile?
[sessility] No, it's free-ranging
A cnidarian?
Not cnidarian
Is it theoretically immortal?
Is it a squid?
[immortal?] No.
[Squid] Yes! Some of nature's fascinatingest animals, and this is a fascinating squid
Mesonychoteuthis hamiltoni?
[Colossal Squid] No, but obviously homing in nicely.
Lepidoteuthis grimaldi?
No. There's about 300 species of squid, so only another 298 to go!
A cuttlefish?
No, definitely a squid.
Does it begin with P?
I failed to see what could possibly be more fascinating than the Grimaldi scaled squid, named after Prince Albert of Monaco, who was a fan and of whom it formed much of the after-dinner conversation. Lettuce carry on. Is it benthic?
[Psquid] No.
[Benthic] Yes, as a broad category
Fascinatingness vs Lepidoteuthis grimaldi - in deference to Prince Albert of Monaco I'll accept a draw
Humboldt squid?
[Humboldt] No. Humboldts seem to be reasonably ordinary, by squid standards.
I'm solid on narwhal, but squids are a bit of a blank with me. The kraken?
arrow_circle_down
Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord