Nightmares sort out the problems of the day and leave you bright and fresh in the morning.

I'm still asleep. I don't have to wake up at 5 AM.

Captain Titus Oates came back in a few minutes later and said, 'Blimey it's a bit nippy out there, I best take me coat'.

Somewhere in the sprawling metropolis - in his secret laboratory - an evil wrongdoer is hatching a dark plot to become the queen and rule the world. Could this be another job for “Security Hamster”?

Yes.

Donald Rumsfeld has trained 30,000 security hamsters in the last three months.

By a remarkable co-incidence, 30,000 is also the my annual take-home pay.