mc5 - ... so help me God.

There is a forthcoming Hollywood blockbuster called'Squirrelzilla'. It stars Morgan Freeman and Dame Judi Dench.

Last night I had a nighmare about an antique hand-crafted Meershaum Briar. It transpired, however, that it was all just a pipe dream.

I have just watched a football match between Dagenham and Redbridge and Brighton and Hove Albion, but 44 players on the pitch made it too confusing.

Don't forget there are only 3 days until Xmas.

Unless you're Orthodox, then it was last month. Damn that Julian Calendar!

The Julian Calendar was supplemented in 1714 by the Sandy Calendar.

The top floor of the Swiss Re building in London is full of penguins.

50% of George Bush's vocabulary was learnt from mice.

Hyde Park is kept green by trained marmosets fertilising the grass.

Dreaming of duck-billed platypuses represents temporary monetary gain, followed by a messy divorce.

The first male human clone is rumoured to be capable of marsupial nurturing of echindnas.

When I go out to Gordon and Sheila’s Pommy-Aussie Chip Shop, I always have a Snake and Echidna pie with a can of Koala.

I just have one question. George Bush has a vocabulary?

Mandy Rice-Davies became a chrysalis shortly after the Profumo scandal broke and emerged as John Prescott.

Playing Mornington Crescent at 3am is an adequate substitute for sleep.

[JLE] Works for me.

[Angus] George W Bush is fluent in at least one language.

Ibid] I did not laugh out loud at that.

[JLE] Playing Mornington Crescent at 1am is better than sex.