All the letters in "pants" are silent.

There I was walking to Baghdad when this flatfish jumped on me from behind, pinned me to the ground and threatened to smash my face in. I was stuck between Iraq and a hard plaice.

I deliberately used bold there.

A bird in the hand is worth approximately £4.76, allowing for inflation and seasonal adjustment.

A bird in the hand is never a problem for Catholic priests.

Keeping your cock in your hand is no good if you want eggs fertilising.You have to put it down amongst the hens, of course - not really a lie, just a piece of gratuitous smut