Yesterday I met a lady who assured me that all that glittered was Gold. She made some interesting purchases too.

glistered not glittered

The custom dictionary is always right.

Roget wrote his thesaurus after losing a bar bet about how many synonyms there are for "harlot".

Roget's real name was actually Roger - but 'Rogers The Saurus' was deemed to be an unsuitable title for such a worthy tome as he might become the victim of crass innuendo.

I have recently pitied the fool that tried to get me onto an aeroplane.

In case of infirmity in old age, I am going to buy a stair-lift to heaven, in case my staircase should prove too arduous a climb.

I have a USB cat.

I catch the Universal Serial Bus to work every morning.