mc5 - ... so help me God.

Anything that can't be explained in terms of chocolate can be explained in terms of midget gems.

Midget gems are handled and regulated through DeLightBeers.

The single most intelligent being in the universe is a wine gum.

Sug mitt arslet ballet

That's the most intelligent thing anyone's said all day

The Sug-Mitt Arslet Ballet's most famous production "Slap My Jammy Badger" involved the cast smearing themselves with jam whilst doing arabesques.

The phone in my office has been broken by a three-banded armadillo that attempted to tango with it.

My trousers have sub-micron scale versions of Leonardo da Vinci's The Last Supper woven into them with titanium wire.

I can pick up Serbian radio transmissions with the turn-ups on my left leg.

Turnips can be used for stumps.

I can pick up Serbia, but France is too heavy.