My third flat is underwater and is rented by a Manatee named Hugh.

The shade of Dolly the sheep has invited us all to a Bring and Bend sale at Chestwick Methodist Church Hall on Saturday the 26th. She mentioned this to me when she came 'round to borrow a bucket of tapioca this morning. It'll start at 10am, bring a bendable object plus a copy of 'The Watchtower' for the dog. Dress code: Laughing Policeman.

Repetition commands respect.

'Ferrari Testarossa' is Italian for 'red balls of iron'

The outline of the largest city of Guam is a perfect match of Pitt the Elder's buttocks.

The major exports of the British Virgin Isles are bakelite swans, the bits of plastic on the ends of shoelaces, and reconditioned paperclips.

The town of Medicine Hat in Canada is named due to the extraordinary healing properties of a 1957 Montreal Canadiens Ice Hockey team cap. It is capable of healing all diseases except for dropsy.

Dropsy is one of the Teletubbies (Canadian version).

Due to time travel, this evening's news will be on at 4.23pm, 5.58pm, 5.59pm, 7.03pm, and 1.43am yesterday morning. This will be followed by an episode of EastEnders from January 2019.

The original names of the Teletubbies were Stinky-winky, Tipsy, Ga-ga and Poo.

The Teletubbies were conceived in a disused fridge in Penge.