mc5 - ... so help me God.

I wasn't born, I congealed.

I have never attempted to collect my farts in any type of glass container.

I have never farted.

My other car is a porch.

There were originally four coins in the fountain, but the fourth one left over artistic differences.

Meatloaf was later shown to have done that aswell, although in his defense it wasn't for love.

I bet you lot all feel embarrassed that you accidentally posted unbolded all this time eh?

My use of italics here is purely accidental and coincidental.

My use of italics here is because I am Italian

Everyone I know is excited about the forthcoming council elections.

Short-sightedness can be temporarily cured by being breathed on by a chicken.

Pope Urban IV was personally responsible for the creation of ninety-six different varieties of cheese.

Octopi can play the bagpipes, but refuse to on the grounds that it makes them look silly.