mc5 - ... so help me God.

Bob the dog

Bill Oddie just came round to borrow a ladder. He was wearing a pair of comedy false breasts. At least I'm fairly sure they were false.

gil

It was me that trashed rab's site. I did it because I'm furious that he's as lazy as I am, and can't be bothered to capitalise the first letter of his name.

Ibid

If you stare at the orange juice in Sainsbury's for long enough, it will play the Marseilleise.

Ibid

Parsnip is denser than lead.

Ibid

'Cagoul' is the Inuit word for nasal mucus.

Ibid

Loud music causes whelks to expand to fifteen times their original size.

Ibid

Tests have shown that monkeys fed purely on cheese actually fight to the death over the slightest provocation.