All telephone calls originating from mobile 'phones within the underground system are automatically directed to the Head of Steam.

(fades in)GWR FM weather: the southwest will experience an unseasonably warm spell, with temperatures reaching 25 degrees. sunny spells will continue through the day, and there will be a light yet refreshing breeze. Traffic news now, and the M4... (fades out)

If you're unlucky enough to have to follow a staple diet, avoid strong magnets.

Chocolate chips are best enjoyed with salt, vinegar, and a rich Hollandaise sauce.

Ratatouille has been banned in six cities in the western United States because rats are anything but twee.

Achilles could have been saved after the ultimately fatal blow to his heel, excpet that Paris would give him his plaster.

I've been listening to the new radio station Philosophy FM, whose motto is "All Aristotle, all the time". Obviously it is targetting the ancients. There is a sister station, Psycho Babble AM, which is targetting the Jung crowd.