The Farnborough International Air Show this year will feature samples of air from all over the world, including Scunthorpe. It will be the first time air has been successfully transported from Scunthorpe

If you listen to Mozart's Requiem backwards you can hear the words 'This is going to be the last bit of music I ever compose'; which is odd because Mozart spoke German.

.siht yltcaxe yas lliw ti sdrawkcab siht dear uoy fI

Unless you are a scuba diver, you are not allowed to go clubbing in Paraguay. You must take your snorkel and flippers along with you as proof of ID.

I have a pair of stilletto flippers and a diamanté snorkel for special underwater evening occasions.

I eat Ferrero Rocher not only for the chocolately nuttiness but also because of the immense air of sophistication they lend me.

There's no place like home.

I don't eat Ferrero Rocher, because they're disgusting.

[Projoy] As does Jonathan Ross.

Projoy] Ditto Jonathan Ross?

[Tuj] Yes, I have.

The most efficient method of reducing the world's over population problem is to encourage homosexuality.

I didn't think there was an over population problem in the world, but on closer inspection there must be! Its quite obvious that the population of the USA has outgrown its own land mass as their population is now frequenting other parts of the globe at an alarming rate! How long before Southport becomes the next Las Vegas???????