Down is the new up.

Goat-insects are commonly thought to be a goat/insect cross, but in actual fact are a sheep/insect cross, hence the white fluffy coat. They where originally bred by Mi5 as an experiment to see if stick insects could be farmed for wool, but due to pressure from the welsh farming community the experiments where dropped and the test subjects released into the wild. The mojority released died from an insect equivelent of syphalus, but a few still remain in a small community located in Exeter, in the hedgerow of a small rural primary school. Local people are now threatening there existance by harvesting them to use as fire lighters, the RSPCA have declared the area a SSSI and are in the process of setting up a breeding program to ensure the goat-insects future.

The sky was such a choppy blue today that I carved out a portion and used it to patch a hole in the sea.

Falstaff is Welsh really.

I add Freeze to my car in summer to stop it working.

"Flat as a Pancake" used as a term in our household means very lumpy, undercooked and coverd in dust,fluff and bits of human/animal hair!!!

The Wizard of Ozz was once the Wizard of Izz but was evicted due to none payment of council tax!

i want something about scotland

We all want something about Scotland

In Scotland, the addition of an exclamation mark instantly makes things funny! However, the original exclamation mark-shaped plans for Hadrian's Wall were cancelled when it was realised nothing was holding uo the top bit.

"Steganography" is the art of hiding a stegasaurus.