Feng Shoe is the gentle Chinese art of bringing balance into your life by rearranging the bottom of the wardrobe.

Daleks get a frisson of pleasure if you say words like 'emphasise', 'portability', 'standardisation', 'correctness', 'proactive', 'security' and 'integrated-cryptography'. Daleks may self destruct if you use phrases such as 'binary emulation', 'multi-platforms' and 'UNIX-like operating systems'.

[Btd] </lie> Wouldn't that work best if applied to middle managers? <lie>

It is mathematically impossible to prove that butternut squash can exist in the same universe as leeks.

As a safety measure, all new space rockets must henceforth be fitted with stabilisers.

Soup is prone to hypochondria.

Bread rolls generally only suffer from hysteria, however.

Projoy] Daleks and middle managers have nothing in common.

After my waistline expanded to 48 inches, I sacked my middle manager. And my head waiter. And my footman come to that.

31 is the answer to The Universe, Everything and Life.

42, obviously is the answer to nothing but Gardening Sin? Mabulate this! (9 letters)

Yoghurt is the feeling one experiences after three hours of Pilates.

hey im david polson from stanly n.c. i luv it in the butt.I WILL SUCK YOUR BALLS OFF.ANYBODY BLACK THAT IS.FREAKY XXX FROM BLACK MEN IS WHAT I WANT.GIVE ME WHAT I WANT AND I WILL GO AWAY.