mc5 - ... so help me God.

Chinese consists of three vowels, a consanont and half a dipthong.

I am the lovechild of a one-night stand between William Hague and Bonnie Langford.

Half a dipthong is a pthong, which I have written a song about under the pseudonym Psisqo.

I once mistook a Mexican standoff with a Mexican standup and laughed and laughed...

Thos .... I expect you're quite dead now.

It is tomorrow.

Salads aren't.

Dalmatians are forever.

Forever is an awfully short time.

Ostriches aren't funny.

Ostriches are funny.

I am not out to confuse.

Life is good

No it's not.

Children are gifts from God, and trail clouds of glory in their wake.

I woke up this morning with a severe attack of jelly-bones.

"Jelly Bones" is Geri Halliwell's latest hit.