mc5 - ... so help me God.

I was arrested by a copper pencil yesterday. I was driving too hard on the B6.

The Parkway East in Pittsburgh, much like the M25, is a marvel of modern transportation and drivers should slow down to 15MPH to sufficiently take in its beauty and efficiency.

Breadmaster

Americans understand the metric system really. They're just having us on.

barbacoa

Everyone over 75 in the UK really understands decimal currency, and the Europeans invented the single currency in the hope that it would eventually reach Britain and confuse all the pensioners.

Tuj

Euros do not look suspiciously like francs used to.

Bob the dog

I thought I saw a Polecat the other day, but when I asked, he said he was from Russia.

Z.K.

It is not at all suspicious that there is only one chain of shops in Britain still selling chocolate coins depicting our own currency.

plump

I put Humpty Dumpty together again.

Kim

I treated Jack for concussion.

Zooological Keeper

I pushed both of them.

Riff

I used to work at the pharmacy where Little Boy Blue bought his narcolepsy medication.

Tuj

I was the cartographer for the Grand Old Duke of !York's Third Light Artillery.

Tina

I participated in a raid that released Mrs. Peter Peter from the pumpkin shell.

Z.K.

Jack Horner ruined all my pies!

DrQu+xum

[ZK] That wasn't his thumb.

Zooological Keeper

I have no idea to what you may be referring.

Bob the dog

From personal experience, Mary Mary was quite amenable.

Zooological Keeper

If Little Bo Peep leaves her sheep alone, they will come home, wagging their tales behind them, and will not be savaged by dogs or rounded up by government officials.

Tina

Miss Muffet has been undergoing counseling for her arachophobia. It's been some success, but she still does not like spiders to sit down beside her. She's also off whey.