In my youth, I joined a hip acting company, but I couldn't make the scene.

Gimmie, gimme, gimme a man after midnight.

At midnight every night I turn into a goat for 5 seconds. This explains the cheese in my shoes in the morning.

</lie> [ZK] Ah - another Tom Lehrer fan? <lie>
I worked in a music shop until I was drummed out.

[DrQ] I once shot a man by mistake, believing him to be a large, flesh-coloured squirrel.

< /l i e>Was someone going to make a separate game for the Job Pun thing? I thought I read that somewhere.

[ZK] Yes, I was. I did it last week.

There is nothing I enjoy more, and indeed all the world seems in tune, when I'm poisoning pigeons in the park.

When it's Fiesta time in old Guadalahhckhhckhhckhhckhhara...then I long to be back in old Mehhckhhckico.

I hold your hand in mine, dear, I press it to my lips.

I have a friend in Minsk, who has a friend in Pinsk, whose friend in Omsk has friend in Tomsk with friend in Akmolinsk.

Sharks gotta swim and bats gotta fly; I gotta love one woman 'till I die.

There's antimony, arsenic, aluminum, selenium,
And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium......

Thank you. For my first encore....