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News Has Come To Harvard
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An annotated list of recently discovered elements to add to the periodic table.
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Britannium
A heavy metal that reacts violently with alcohol.
Hocknium
Traces of this element are found in both Yorkshire and California. Burns with a very smoky flame.
Poxygen
An essential trace element in natural aphrodisiacs.
Bilium
An element with mind-altering properties, rendering the subject contemptuous of everything he lays eyes on. Many comments on blog posts are made under the influence of bilium.
Moron
An element in the group as Sillyium, can turn base elements into fool's gold.
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