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OK, new topic: how about HOSPITAL RADIO DJ

"And now, for all you oldies, here's Eddie Cochran's Three Steps to Heaven."

"Especially for junior doctors on the night shift, here is a selection of soothing lullabies."

And now an urgent message for Mr Eric Sergeantson in the Kensington Ward. You were told this afternoon that you had 48 hours to live, but there has been a mistake. Dr Humphreys says he was meant to tell you yesterday. Now, Groove is in the Heart by Deee-lite.

"Pssssst ... Hello? This is God. Yes, you lying in the bed there .......... that's right I 'm talking to you. It is time. Come into the light my child. Come into the light."