Do you realise that for every mile you drive, a baby dies?

I would recommend changing the brakes as the cars stopping distances are a bit long when we tested, don't worry about the bumper as that can be replaced but we will have to bill you for the damage to our wall.

When you say "righty tighty", is that my right?

I'm sorry ma'am, but I was unable to repair the damage to your tire. Since I was a wee lad I could not abide to see anything suffer, so I maneuvered your car around back and put a bullet into its engine block.

"Anybody hear the concert on Radio 3 last night?"