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Each Move Must Consist Of Precisely Eight Words
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Just as it says on the tin. What happens in the game may be debated in the game: perhaps it'll be a conversation, perhaps a word-limited reprise of various games we play, or whatever.
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That means the computer wants a Big Mac.
Stand Back! I'm raiding the office biscuit tin.
Feed the ginger nuts to the computer, pen.
I try, but the mouse gets them first.
Well, pen, what you need is a cat
A coarse-furred and fearsome beast called Boris, say.
Boris, is that like Bluto from Popeye cartoons?
That image is going to stick with me!
Bluto was a pussycat really, so to speak.
Yeah, he had to play soft for Olive.
Your olives are soft? Cooked them too long!
I think Giertrud started with the double entendres.
Today is an august occasion, last of many.
Don't be so Septemberish. Think of the autumn!
We now have Rs in the month again.
Also numbers in Latin. August should be Sexber.
I'm confused. When would my birthday be then?
(pen) January or February? Then Undecember or Duodecember.
Today's 90210. Did you watch Beverly Hills?
T'was only 90210 in America... Day first, please!
American's had 9/11, we had 7/7. Avoids confusion.
But 7-11 is a convenience store. Free slurpees?
'Slurpees'? Now who is on the double entendres?
Actually, today in Britain it's 8/9/10 - that works.
I only know "slurpee" as a cold drink.
Sounds more like one at body heat (coat!)
Body heat, 37 degrees, Taraval, Parkside San Francisco
Don't they use Fahrenheit scale in San Fran?
Maybe he means cold-blooded creatures such as fish.
You mean Shion Sono's new movie "Cold Fish"?
>I have never even heard of this movie!
I've heard of the movie called "Catfish," though.
Plus, I have also heard of "Big Fish."
'Big Fish' are only ever figments of imagination.
Yes, my mate never caught a thirty-pound carp.
What's that Rosie? You do nothing but carp.
I perch, being a Norwegian Blue, albeit dead.
I goldfish. That is, I fish for gold.
I hake. Hall over. It's the Harthritis. Houch!
I kip, therefore I must be a kipper.
I've just had my shoes soled and eeled.
I hear sea shanties. Must be someone's Icod.
Speak up, Rosie, my herring's not so good.
(Softers) Surely you can still hear the bass.
(Rosie) No, mate, I have a bad cod.
Maybe you need the drumming of Max Roach.
Ah, Fish puns, fish puns, roly-poly fish puns!
I dolphin-ately am enjoying this bit of luna-sea.
Isn't it a great song, Salmon Chanted Evening.
Another song beckons: Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
[Phil] It's neither the time nor the plaice...
Maybe it's time to get our skates on.
I'd better take my mackerel I'll get soaked.
[Porter!] Even if I'm accompanied by Colin Sell?
Not even John Dory would make any difference.
I think Nemo would take offense at these.
Not even eight words all weekend. Why not?
Perhaps there has been an overtime ban, pen.
Overtime schmovertime. There's always eight words to spare!
Feel free to borrow any of these ones.
Right, I will go for a "feel" then.
Good man. Do not bypass the gentlemanly preliminaries.
Software, somebody might want to "cop a feel."
Perhaps someone'd also like to feel a cop.
Yes, certain people like a bit of helmet.
Well, I think that can't be capped, Rosie
Could be if it were a welfare benefit.
Also if it spouted oil, thus aiding lubrication.
Or played cricket, rugby or a sitting-down game
Or were getting on in years a bit.
You and me, Rosie, but what about others?
Don't worry. We're getting older all the time.
'There's no turning back' said the forward thinker
Stopped clock is right two times a day.
What's the time being we do things for?
Has anyone got an idea for a game?
Pheasant. A very tasty game.
Oh bugger, mixed up haiku and eight words.
And too bold, too bold, too bold! Arse.
And there isn't even a haiku game here.
Except one with word count: eight, eight, eight
This game is very good. Carry on chaps.
That would seem to exclude penelope. Won't do.
*chaps it up with the best of them*
We cannot have sex or gender discrimination here!
*wonders about the difference between sex and gender*
*gives INJ a lesson on birds and bees*
Phew. Back to birds. Pheasant, a tasty game.
Constabulary. Also known as piggery. Full of filthiness.
Eight word haikus could become quite the thing.
Sex and gender are different: Learned in college.
Also, would be left out if only chaps.
Revisit Phil's words. Consider gauntlet taken. Excellent challenge!
They taught you sex in college? How worrying!
They teach each other about sex in college.
Forget the sex! Eight word haiku's the thing.
Poetry shmoetry! Give me sex every time, mate.
Club called VOX wanted to teach safe sex.
Garden waste in Esher is placed in secks.
Now even the Pope is promoting safe sex.
Garden waste in Escher goes in Klein bottles.
(Raak) In Klein bottles? What does that mean? otherwise v good BTW
A non-orientable surface with no "inner" or "outer" sides.
Whoops. For a mathematician I'm rubbish at counting.
[Felix Klein] That makes you a qualified accountant.
(pen) Or a member of a musical ensemble.
Have an accountant friend: says, "But that's math!"
(Rosie) I like ensembles that sing birthday songs.
There are, I understand, three kinds of mathematician.
No, 10. Those who understand binary / the rest.
[INJ] Thunder stealing is neither big nor clever, sir!
Three kinds of people: Can count, can't count.
That's the funniest thing you've said all year.
Well, the year is nearly over, isn't it?
I hate saving the best until last.
Snow, snow, snow... when will it ever end?
Snow, of course, ends with the letter W!
There's no snow here in Lake Charles, LA!
It has ended here. The sun is shining.
[Softers] What has ended? The week? The silliness?
[pen] Whatever floats your boat, I would say.
The existence of buoyancy has ended? Oh my.
[Tuj] Aye. Anyone else getting that sinking feeling?
If the Netherlands sink any further they'll disappear.
Dam it, that's what I say, dam it.
Know what I say? Leave it to beavers.
Which body of water do you want dammed?
Damn the lot of them. Damn you all!!!!
I say, pen, this is most unlike you.
It is probably the stress of seasonal shopping.
Dutch shops are utterly useless for Christmas shopping.
Yes, after Sinter Klaus they are bought out.
There was never anything interesting in them anyway!
Not even caps? They can always be useful.
Too many big box stores in the USA.
Is a 'box store' a cash and carry?
More like a smash and grab, I think.
I think in the UK, they are ASDA?
I would want to get outta ASDA ASAP.
Why? I quite like ADSA. Better than Tesco.
You ain't seen a Dutch supermarket yet, chaps.
Yes I have. I do quite like Vla.
It's just cold custard! Gullible, gullible, lemon gullible.
Also comes in chocolate flavoured gullible. Syrup waffles!
Stroop wafels - yeah, especially fresh and still warm.
Misheard lyrics: Windmill cookies, they'll give you gonorrhea!
Uh? Gier? You okay? Stroopwafels - cookies in USA.
Sometimes, people just don't make senseto me.
I don't even know what "senseto" means
Me neither. Any other buggers got any clues?
sen-se-to: Japanese art of making much with little.
'Twould be quite different making mulch with little.
Sen-se-o: Art of pretentious coffeemaking using expensive gadget.
Ooh, Sen-sei: Line from a cancelled Carry-on film.
Pen, I thought that had the name Starbucks.
Not many in this Dutch nation of coffee-drinkers.
Pen, would that be Sterdollar or something similar?
Doncha know Europe uses Euros, not dollars, Giertrud?
Not all of Europe: Great Britain has pounds.
I know. I'm British, living in continental Europe.
You just have to admire the Swiss though
Phil, on what basis do you admire them?
They roll extremely jammily, whilst yodelling folk songs?
They make extremely good knives for their army?
Own up - what have you done with Rosie?
She was absolutely delicious served on buttered toast.
[GGZS] Deffo wasn't you. Rosie is a he.
Ros-he? Well then, who was it I ate?
(FGZstar) Not female - not young either. See here.
So merely a confusing choice of name, then.
No, perfectly logical when you know his name.
Re: Swiss - well, there's the Geneva bus system
I happen to like the chocolate Swiss rolls.
Well, does the Geneva bus system bus tables?
Does the previous sentence have a word missing?
No. It uses the American verb 'to bus'.
'Twas an American who said "Verbing weirds nouns."
But isn't it an adjective that's been weirded?
"to bus" is a back formation from "busboy"
"busboy" itself seems to come from "omnibus boy"
"omnibus" being Latin for "for everything", of course
Ahem, I think in this case "for everybody".
Latin aside, what else is new and interesting?
Shall we discuss the upcoming Oscars luvvy parade?
Only if I can register my supreme indifference.
No registrations are being taken at this time.
Oh, good. That means you can park anywhere.
Even on a cloud up in the sky?
Virtual parking? The government will surely tax it.
Croydon Council even taxes virtuous parking, the bastards.
Gives them something to feel good about, probably.
My telescope objective is free from spherical aberration.
Nice to know. How's your belly for spots?
A spot on my belly meant chicken pox.
Hummmph! Now you've spread contagion into the game!
Coughs and sneezes spread diseases, so they say.
There are many agreeable ways of infecting people.
Sharks with laser beams is NOT a method!
Sharks with laser beams is from Austin Powers.
Sharks with bank accounts are from Austin, Texas
Pleased to report windy miller much improved today.
(pen) Good. May his quixotic pursuits continue unabated.
The sun is shining bright. Well here, anyway.
(Softers) Here also. Shows up all the dust.
Here too. I had to clean the windows.
(pen) Did you play your jolly ukulele simultaneously?
[Rosie] The strings sound funny when they're wet.
(pen) They would, like those of pub pianos.
Eight words for April, anyone? Someone? We're desperate.
How about: where are all the April showers?
They are biding their time, menacingly, until summer.
We've already had at least three of them.
A big storm came through Lake Charles, LA.
We need April flannels and April soap, too.
Time for your spring clean, Giertrud? Have fun!
April flannels? Surely it's too early for cricket?
Not at all. Durham was playing on Sunday.
Summer comes early to East and West Hartlepool.
Right. I'm off to work. Happy Friday, folks.
Ha! Work. The state pays me not to.
[Rosie] Can't wait, only 1038 days to go.
A mere youth. Friday fortnight I'll be 25,000.
I'm sailing back to Blighty on Wednesday - hurrah!
I'm sailing to France on Friday, hurrah too!
[software] Me too. A full wedding avoidance week.
As usual during the day, the telly's off.
I will be sipping beer and relaxing, myself.
Oh? Wedding Avoidance? Is someone getting married? (heh!)
My Union flag will fly in our straat
Unfortunately, even the French television will cover it.
Gier, don't act like you are not interested.
You know I'm being sarcastic -- teasing the Brits!
Brits are notorious for misunderstanding sarcasm...and irony.
I fail to see the irony in that.
As regards sunsets, coppery is better than irony.
Isn't irony what British humour is mostly about?
(Knobbly) I assume that is third-order irony.
Most British humour is lavatorial, isn't it? *snigger*
That is why it's gone down the pan.
Right down the pan, just ask Mervyn King.
I wish I had gone to bed earlier.
pen, where you tired or for another reason?
Regularly in bed too late, always up early :o(
It's been the driest spring since records began.
Hidden textMy records, that is, so 1983.
In Surrey, maybe. In Jersey only number two.
Sounds nice; I have always fancied desiccated rock.
Rain at last. Wish it would go away.
Same here. Least the drought warning's been lifted.
Why can I not stop thinking of doughnuts?
<mode="Homer">Mmmmmmm... Doughnuts</mode>
For completeness, please say 'doughnuts' three more times.
Doughnuts doughnuts doughnuts. Happy now?
[CdM], That is not eight words all at once.
I guess New Jersey takes after Old Jersey.
CdM doesn't need to count; he's an economist.
In this game, CdM's entries just don't count.
New Jersey is much bigger than Old Jersey.
Old jersey has probably shrunk in the wash.
Not just Old Jerseys. My new-ish one shrank.
I imagine that would enhance your delightful contours.
[K] "Eight words all at once." Now are you happy?
I don't know about you, but I am.
I'm happy enough, for now. No particular reason.
I'm not very happy; but that's my problem.
I'm not very happy; but that's my problem.
Sort it our guys. Whose problem is it?
I don't think it's my problem - no explosions.
Pull yourselves together, you miserable bunch of wimps.
That's almost the end of a knock-knock joke.
It would seem nights is a flatulence therapist.
[Knobbers] Happily, there's no end of knock-knock jokes.
Oh, but that I were. Such great fees.
Knock, knock. Who's there? A doctor. Doctor who?
I don't get it.
Does CdM intentionally flout the word count rule?
To assume otherwise would be to invoke innumeracy.
And we all know that could prove distastrous.
Maybe. But other reasons are even less flattering.
CdM believes the market should set the count
By his reckoning, we would all be short-changed!
I just put the definitive answer in "Movies."
[CdM], I'm happy, but that's still ten words.
I'm not happy, because Rupert Murdoch's still alive.
[KS] I'm afraid irach beat you to it
Yup, time for another eight words before Friday?
A restaurant sign here says 8 is great.
All I need do is write eight words?
Only if they are exactly the right words.
If not, someone might get testy. Or grumpy!
Where do I find the arbiter of rightness?
Oh, well. Maybe my next one'll be good.
[cfm] Me.
I hope so, Kaggers. Next time, try harder!
If in doubt; try, try, try, try, try again.
One, two, miss a few, ninety-nine, one hundred.
[CdM] I'd like to have eight words with you.
Play nicely, boys. What plans for het weekend?
Doing not a lot between all the visitors.
Get together with Mrs INJ's folks down South
Enumerating the definite article in all European languages.
Barbecue on Sunday perhaps? Two days before birthday :-)
Same thing I do every day, Pinky: nothing.
[pen] I'll be playing nicely with the boys
Reunion piss-up with old housemates in Bristol area.
Entertaining new nieces for a day - teenaged twins.
Wishing Phil a happy birthday, for one thing.
[Tuj] I learned that rhyme in middle school.
In New York, we learned something else entirely.
I learned many rhymes while in elhi grades.
Tuj and Kag, I learned it in Kindergarten.
GiertKag RudShuko - so not that long ago, eh?
Last workday before nuptuals. Too much to do!
If anybody present knows a reason why...
I used to shoot weddings -- it was fascinating.
Ceremony takes 10 minutes. Party takes 10 hours.
That seems to be in the right proportion.
Blissfully short, and in a foreign language. Perfect.
Finally, summer arrives. It's too bloody hot today.
Never fear, penelope. Rain is on its way.
And blustery whippy windiness. I do love autumn.
It's whipping round the 6th floor at 50kph
How jolly exciting! Is the wind blowing too?
Chalky, I'll take that statement as a compliment.
Whipping? Are we talking cream or sadomasochistic stuff?
I'm thinking of split cane fly fishing rods.
I'm thinking of a word beginning with P.
How long would it take to guess it?
Eight times quicker than a one word game.
Unless no-one posts because they despise your efforts...
Possibly picturesque paintings put pretty pictures 'pon pillars?
Perch, Pig, Pony, Pygmy, Pike, Polyp, Percheron, Peacock?
Plump pears, perchance per pound, perhaps per person?
If those are guesses, no. Is this fun!?
Perfectly pleasant. Pie, profiteroles, pastries or potted pork?
No, but you're travelling in an appropriate direction!
Patisserie or pork products? I give up peeing.
[pen] Animals then edibles. The answer was "prawn".
When is it lunch time? I'm hungry now.
I have already had my lunch, so there.
Is the weekend over? But I'm not ready!
Worry not, [pen], another will be approaching soon.
Can another weekend come before the new week?
Six days to write a 90 minute speech.
Does anyone listen to a 90 minute speech?
They must, if they want the cocktails afterwards.
Fifteen minutes a day, no problem right pen?
You're forgetting umpteen re-drafts and bloody research, Tuj. -How am I supposed to know what he wants to say? I'm only the writer!!
Pen, ghostwriting is no fun. I know first-hand!
I was best man for groom I barely knew.
My speech was generic: "One speech fits all"
"Laydeees and Gennelmen, Eye thengyew fur turning up!"
Tuesdays are my Mondays. First day at office.
Seven days, but not even eight words. Shameful.
Seems as if no-one has anything to say.
I'm baffled this game has lasted five years.
One, two, three, four, five years? Nice work!
Did you know "Bewildered" does not mean "Astonished?"
You're baffled? You've got things blocking you off?
I assumed "Bewildered" was a synonym for "Confounded".
Gosh, I do love this game. Don't you?
No.
CdM has a thing about following the rules.
I can follow them if I want to. Really.
CdM follows the rule of not following rules.
[Raak] Reverse psychology? Worth a try, I guess!
Happy Guy Fawke's Day As Well As Night.
Guy Fawkes is one thing I really miss.
When do they set off fireworks over there?
Every bloody night, according to Dr Qu+xum (ret'd)
A really big bonfire at Taunton this year.
Yes, that's my coat. Why do you ask?
Can I borrow it? I need to swear.
I rarely need to swear, but do anyway.
Swearing is clinically proven to make things better.
F*ck yeah!
Well, why don't you do it properly, then?
[Rosie] Because some here are monitored by netnannies
Damn it! That was eight words, wasn't it?
Everyone conforms to the norm, sooner or later.
Sorry? Pardon? What? Was someone talking about me?
Are you the Norm or any old Norm?
Is there any such thing as the norm?
Not this Saturday, nope. Everything pleasingly abnormal today.
Who? Me? What? Are you talking about me?
My sister is one more abnormal year older.
On the 25th, I turned 28, quite normally.
Normally? No! You change age every year surely!
Perceived time is a logarithmic function of age.
Do we need to discuss Einstein's Relativity Theory?
We certainly do, because everyone's a neutrino nowadays.
I'm not. I travel much slower than light.
I rarely get home before dark these days.
(pen) There's something of the night about you.
Maybe. Monday morning, good intentions, still in pyjamas.
It's too bloody early. Way too bloody early.
Went out and bought my Christmas tree today
So how was Tuesday for everyone? Dull here.
Like uncooked baked beans, cold and rather windy.
Nearly the shortest day. First; the longest night.
Now, please let's have some lights on, eh?
Beans must be eaten before the wind happens.
Bean emitting gusts shall be returned to Tesco's.
Beans, Beans, The musical Fruit [to be continued]
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel...
We should have beans for all our meals!
Agree. I had beans on toast for breakfast.
Walked in in daylight; first time this year
First time for daylight, I mean; not walking.
I thought you learned to walk each year.
I'd be more amazed if you could fly.
I can fly, but I choose not to.
There is an art, or knack, to flying.
You can learn it from "Teach Yourself Flying".
Hold book, flap at the same time? Impossible!
Perhaps the book's flaps act like stabilisers. Beginning...
Just throw yourself earthwards, and then miss.
I gave my views on this topic here but I needed 42 more words than are approved in this game.
Does it count if you fail to land?
Are you hovering mid-air, waiting for the answer?
I am up in the air over levitation.
I once taught flying in a vivid dream.
Are you sure it was just a dream?
True or False? Dillon - one fifty-eighth of second.
False. False, false, false, false, false! Flippin' false!
You don't know how true that is, Phil.
Pancake, pancake, pancake, pancake; one more pancake? Nope.
At half-time the Up'ards are leading one nil
Down'ards made it one all on day two
Mid'ards stole the ball, reducing things to farce.
Well, that is leap day almost done with.
So now it's March. Spring is almost here!
Where is 'here?'? No sign of it yet.
Here is where I am- on the rock.
I've found an old ha'penny in my change.
It's probably worth more than the 2p substitution.
Are you going to wear green this Saturday?
There's no sign of here yet? Then where?
I shall be wearing red, for rugby reasons.
I shall be drinking Guinness for obvious reasons.
Timne for eight words? Or time to stop?
I'm sure I can think of eight words
Me too! But I won't.
Can we use CdM's self-appointed privileges for good?
Mwaahahahahahahahahahaha!!
Ah ha! CdM ever the maverick, I see.
Attention-seeker, more like. Just ignore him for now.
Ignore who? Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Remember rule of thumb: don't feed the troll
How will we get to cross the bridge?
We're back on. That's all right then, chaps.
Back from my trip to Bristol, in fact.
'Back from Bristol' - is that a euphemism, Softers?
Take it as it comes. It's not plural.
Spicy parsnip and cheese puffs. Cook or not?
Just drink the wine and cooking be damned!
Grading, grading, grading, grading, grading, grading, grading, grading






Grading
How is your new roadmaking job going, CdM?
Gradely (a word that comes from Old Norse).
Time for a nice cup of tea, methinks.
Went to Lord's for first time today. Terrific.
Might 'do' Madrid in November. Any recommendations, folks?
Wow -- haven't been in here for AGES. Remind me. What are the rules?
Not sure. I think CdM nicked the rulebook.
Used the pages to write shopping lists, probably.
I use cut-up tea cartons for shopping lists. That should kill it stone dead for another week.
I list to one side when out shopping.
I tend to get very lost in shipping.
My BlueAnchor Bay friend superscopes Bristol Channel ships :)
I've rather missed all this. I think. Anyway.
What can I do with these seven spaces?
Fill them with Dwarves. Or Sins. Or Wonders.
I'd suggest hangman, but that's already occurring elsewhere.
The weather is getting drier or I'm mistaken.
Yes, that's very true; you are indeed mistaken
I'm mistaken for someone I'm not most days.
[Botherer] Nice to see you here Prince Charles!
Listening to French radio sometimes helps. Wonder why?
[pen] I have no idea. My it's hot!
French radio is generally rubbish, except for FIP.
(Softers) What's your it and why's it hot?
A propos nowt, when is it home time?
Soon. Very soon. At least I hope so.
Well, another month already. Autumn is nearly here.
Not quite yet. The weekend was a scorcher.
One week later. And only I speak. Why?
'Cos you're a bit of a chatterbox, Pen.
Is there anyone here who fancies Nigella Lawson?
Not obsessively, Rosie. She is quite attractive though.
She has a sort of louche appeal.
She fancies herself too much for my taste.
Nigella! *daydreams for a while*   No, not me.
The mental image of her father is off-putting!
Thou shalt not have fantasies about Nigella's father!
She is far too sugary in my opinion.
Sugary? Do you mean Nigella or her father?
Her Dad's a climate sceptic and therefore bonkers.
[Rosie] Are you sure that you don't have that backwards?
(CdM) It's quite plausible that he's bonkers a priori.
His name, anagramatically, is We all sign on.
That reminds me of Bob Monkhouse on HIGNFY.
I am not sure about making amusing anagrams.
Are you concerned with the propriety of it?
My hair is now fifty shades of grey.
[pen] Hair dye makes it fifty shades darker.
Then why doesn't it work on my beard?
It is hair dye, it's not BEARD dye.
I am told that you can't dye beards.
No-one told Billy Connolly that. His was pink.
[pen] That's true, but what about his beard?
Are you challenging Phil as top filth merchant?
I do not want filth. Family phrases accepted.
Hidden textI am not sure about making awkward rhopalic.
I have no idea whence this reputation came.
Acrophil sounds like a top man to me.
Apologies, but when they pop up, I'm obliged.
November. Not a good month for eight words?
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, Aug-Oh.
I only know seven words, including these words.
[Phil] No wonder you keep losing at Scrabble.
I'm the one who always loses at Scrabble.
[pen] You might be having a bad spell.
Only seven words I know. These seven only.
At least there is a bit of variety.
Looks like six to me, Phil.
Seven! Including these seven, I know seven words!
But do you know what they mean, severally?
These seven words? Only I know, I know.
I only know I've been to the dentist.
I guess you know the drill by now.
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