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Pea and Honey Recipes
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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.
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Well, just for one ode
Back to normal when this is complete
The normal service is resumed
And nights feels most ashamed
That deed must never be exhumed
And no-one will be blamed
I sit in this ejector seat
With my finger poised over 'Re-Tweet'
(pen) Whyjer do that?
Because I have flu and my brain isn't working properly... sorry. Try again...
I sit in this ejector seat
And press the big red button
Alas, I'm in a 'copter
Over Carshalton and Sutton
I wish I were a beer mat (Chalky) :-)
Soaking-up real ale
But sadly I'm a meerkat [Rosie] ;-)
Deserted, full of fail
I wish that on the internet
I'd find just one true thing
Bat sadly there is Google
And, even worse, there's Bing
I wish I were the Christmas elf [Phil] the exact line I had envisaged ;o)
Who loads old Santa's sled
For after working all day long
I get ou' me 'ead.
I wish my Christmas stocking
Were twenty-four feet long
For holding my gift ladder
And the cast of 'Desert Song'
I wish I spoke Italian
Just like old Silvio
Coz the translation for 'stallion'
Is 'Sly Stallone' dontcha know Kapow.
I wish I were a snowflake
All flaky, frigid, cold
But I would be so delicate
I'd crumble, truth be told.
I wish I was a skater I've never seen the Dutch get so excited about anything so much as the prospect of canal skating at the weekend. Looking less likely now, though
In frilly lycra tights
Head down and arms a-flailing
On me you'd set your sights
I wish I were the evening star
Hesperus by name Hesperus by nature. Nudge, nudge.
Chuffing down to Swindon way
To take the wall of shame

- my paternal grandmother - god rest her soul - used the phrase 'wreck of the Hesperus' on a daily basis - not really sure why. She never mentioned evening stars or Swindon environs.


There's something 'bout a limerick
Don't know quite what it is (Chalky)
Hidden textSofters and I occasionally exchange cryptic references to steam locos in these pages and elsewhere in the Morniverse. "Evening Star" was the name given rather sentimentally to the last steam locomotive built by British Railways, at Swindon in March 1960. Ugly great thing, more like the Wr of the H. My Mum's favourite phrase was "Patience on a monument."
P'raps it is the scansion [rosie] ;o)
Or just where the wit is
This is my resolution:
Just ten square meals a day
One hundred miles of cycling
Then sell it on eBay
I wish I were a stick of rock
My avatar writ through
Or gothic-scribed with 'Blackpoo'[sic]
But Milton Keynes will do
I wish I were a Rolling Stone
Pref'rably Sir Michael
I'd proudly flaunt my rubb'ry lips
Which daily self-recycle
I wish I was a slow, sure thaw
That melts the ice and snow
I'd change the ice to sogginess
And make the rivers flow.
I wish I had a shopping list
To go with my fat wad
Because I'm so impulsive
At following a fad
It does not take me very long
In fact no time at all
To type into this little box
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