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Pea and Honey Recipes
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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.
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Except the pygmy marmoset
I don't like it at all.
My love is like a boil-ed sweet
It's sweet and hard and sticky
And when I suck it in my cheek
I give myself a hickey
Our love was never rash or wrong
But rauchy, wriggly, rapt
Er, raunchy.
Now I'm covered in a itchy rash
All poxy, syphed, and clapped.
My loves are lovely, dark and deep
Consisting, as they do
Of Amelle, Jade and Heidi
Hidden textThe Sugababes, fyi
Tweety Pie and Wicky Woo
My love is like a firework
That explodes, then fades to dark
My cherry bomb has long been popped
We did it in the park.
The wisest thing I ever heard
I now will tell to you:
When romantic'lly you've erred We await the wisdom - who's it going to be, who's it going to be?
Just hide the corpse from view.
My love is like a stifled sneeze
Which makes your ears go pop
It's better out than in, I say
So don't let your knickers drop My coat is the one at the left hand side ...
My love is like an urban fox
A-rifling in the trash or 'bin' if you're English. You choose.
She slinks along the midnight docks
Exchanging sin for cash or vice versa if you speak Brit English
My love is like a whooping crane
Slender, tall, aloof
She eats raw fish for breakfast
While standing on the roof
My love is like a tower crane
She stands so tall and strong
Lifting bricks to dizzy heights
As she does my dong. lovely girl
My love is quite the ding dong bell (belle?)
She says I sound her chimes
We make love in the steeple
Countless, sinless times
Comme haut arbre est mon amour
Ca me paraît sans fin
Et moi, j'n'suis que minuscule
J'ai une pine, hélas, pas un pin.
Mein Liebling ist eine heftige Frau
Who doesn't speak the lingo
But underneath her monobrow
She thinks of naught but bingo.
My chair is made of plasticine
It moulds to my own shape
But when my cat sits on it
It acts like sticky-tape
My other chair's a Chippendale
With strong and shapely arms
It stoutly holds my nether end
While I display my charms
I sit in this ejector seat
Thanking heavens my hair is all neat
have we slipped mode?
Well, just for one ode
Back to normal when this is complete
The normal service is resumed
And nights feels most ashamed
That deed must never be exhumed
And no-one will be blamed
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