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Pea and Honey Recipes
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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.
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I wish I knew the answer
I haven't got a clue
Don't understand the question
Besides, I'm pissed. What's new?
I've changed my online atavar
The new one's so much cuter [ITYM "avatar" ;-)]
I like to watch her in the nude
By hacking her computer
I wish I was a chocolate bar
Instead I'm just a flake
But just like British chocolate I have an ending in mind, I wonder if others do?
I leave Hershey's in my wake [Soft] was that it?
I wish I were an ombudsman
I would investigate
Nefariousness in all its forms
The piss I would not take [Phil] Not quite - "I'm just a bloody fake" was my idea.
i wish my work was finished
And I could go straight home
But maybe I'd swing by the pub
"I can't resist." (Georg Ohm)
Banality in all its forms
Is found on MC here
In fact it is one of our norms
No deep thoughts shall appear.
(A hymn to be sung to the tune of "All Things Bright and Beautiful".)
If any intellectual
Attempts to prove us wrong
She or he'll be pilloried
In poetry and song. Fat chance
A cross-eyed bear called Gladley
Met a cock-eyed bear called Bill
The pair devoured a wall-eyed pike
Strabismus wins two-nil.
I wish I were a dashing spy
Dashing from Prague to Rome
With pistol, gloves and killer shades
And camera in my comb

Perhaps this deserves several verses ..

I'd have no need for mundane things
I'd love my Austin Martin
Its blazing guns would clear the road
And leave the baddies smartin'


My basic needs would be supplied - usa
(Women, wine, and poker chips)
My cool, suave charm would be applied
To Octopussy's swaying hips.
Nasty villains I'd track down
Mmmmm - try that with more space

Software - Nasty villains I'd track down

Blow up their secret hideaways
they'd stroke their cats to no avail
Their henchmen turned to runaways. oish

On service to Her Majesty

My license is to kill
With ricin or with bullets' aim
Either way it's brill.

I'm on the SMERSH most-wanted list
But do not care a jot
I'm women-and-martini-pissed
My suave is all to pot


Most of all, I'm just so cool
My machismo knows no bounds
But that's my dream. In real life
I'm a milkman on my rounds Well, that was fun while it lasted :o)
I wish I were a painter
My house I'd decorate
I'd paint it in pink candystripes
and sell it to the Tate
I wish I were decisive. That spy series wasn't bad at all. A bit of polishing and it would be reminiscent of Milligan.
Or do I? I'm not sure
But then, on the other hand
I like to dither more
I wish I could remember
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