mc5 - Pea and Honey Recipes

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Pea and Honey Recipes

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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.

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I wish I drove a big red bus

Along a big bus lane

I wouldn't stop for passengers

I'd drive them all insane

I wish I was a frying pan

Sizzling on the stove

Your bacon would come out real crisp

A breakfast treasure trove

I wish I were the Ace of Spades

The Leader of the Pack

I would trump all other cards

Red's red, but Black is black.

I wish I were a harem guard

My scimitar all curvy

But the limit to my manhood

Is sky-high 'cos I'm pervy.

I wish I were Hungarian

A Magyar through and through

I'd feed all day on goulash

Rhapsodise on paprikash too

I wish I had a caravan Would save all this 'Moving House' lark

The desert I would cross

I'd own ten dromedaries

Of which I'd be the boss.

I wish I were in Ngrongoro

A safari I would take

To see migrating wildebeest

(They take five hours to bake)

I wish I was a sofa bed

Of mighty width and girth

I'd still be quite uncomfortable

To someone giving birth.

I wish I was a colander It's a strain, it really is

Round and full of holes

I'd do my job hole-heartedly

And drain myself in bowls

I wish I was a clerihew

Fame and glamour as my theme

But peas and honey are my lot

The rest is just a dream.

Ii wish my lips were cherry-hued

And not just chewed and hairy

I'd do things that are very rude

To prove I'm not a fairy

I wish I were a piano string

A-stretched out very taut

I'd resonate in harmony

When e're I think I ought

I wish I were a sonnet

Five feet by fourteen long

I'd place my thoughts upon it

Whether right or wrong

I wish I were a limerick

Instead of four-line verse

My third and fourth lines would then rhyme

And scan, and be quite terse.

I wish I were more handsome

To pick up lots of girls

Their hearts I'd hold to ransom

As they'd run fingers through my curls

I wish I were a Hero

And pref'rably not dead

'Cos then I'd do heroic things

Instead, I stay in bed.

[CdM] Preview, idiot!

I wish that I had second sight wouldn't need preview then, would I?

As back-up for the first

Such fortunate clairvoyance

Makes one seem rehearsed.

I wish that I had stayed in bed

For getting up today

I strained my back and must sit down

O woe! Alack! Alay!

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