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Pea and Honey Recipes
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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.
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That's nothing like her normal brand
I'd duck if I were you.
I laughed...
I wish I was a Liar
And my nose was five yards long
I'd poke it up Lord Archer's bum
'Cos he says it doesn't pong But we all know about him, don't we boys and girls?
I wish I had a wishing well
I'd drop coins in it an hope
Hrmph!
Tuj - I wish I had a wishing well
Software - I'd drop coins in it and hope
And if my wish did not come true
I'd throw tantrums and mope
I wish I wasn't here right now
I'd rather be in Derry
And I wish I wasn't Tom the cat
'Cos he's from County Kerry
I wish I was a barnacle
Adhering to the bottom
And when they came to scrape me off
I'd shout and scream, God rot 'em.
I wish I were an ocelot
I'd slink around my prey - [Am loving the last two - kudos all round]
I'd sleep in trees - I'd doss a lot Wossa kudo? Is it like a podume?
That's how I'd pass my day
I wish I were a kinkajou
Dweeling in the trees [Rosie] Japanese ideal based on the inherent idea of podumes without the physical objects themselves
My dweel would scatter down to earth
And make capybaras sneeze
Oh, dweel
While dweeling round the whipple tree
Parailing all I'd wotten (Tuj) Ah!
I groiled a nupthuck's pack o' three
Which craulked me something rotten :-(
[R, R, K, C] I'm reminded of Kandra Woods, a game of Jabberwockian verse I've only encountered as part of the currently dormant* Furcation Game but a full version of which took place at MCiOS (also currently dormant**). Doesn't meant I shouldn't have checked my spelling though :P

* a bit hopeful: approaching 1000 days since the last move!
** hopefully dormant on a far, far lesser magnitude
Shall we continue in the same vein for a while?
I wish I were an actroblub
Or knew just what one was
[IS,P] Hmmph .. don't wanna play, eh? NOW what do I do? Carry on regardless Jabber-stylee [as Kim suggested] or attempt to follow your lead? Friday mornings are simply not designed for such decisions :-)
[Chalks] I'd argue that this one could be continued with an attempt to define an actroblub in the Jabba style.
[Ispers] Good argument :-)
I wish I were an actroblub
Or knew just what one was
My quoil stope seems to fit the bill
I'm absolutely pos.
The quirly bims of Ishtaru
Upon the city wall
Their ush-hahas all vixy blue (ISP) There y' are - it's a quoil stope. Say no more. But for the "t" it could be the kids next door - Extreme Crying.
I'd love to paint them all [Chalks] Ispers? Lovely!
Of all the strogs in London
And Witney Scrotum too © Peter Tinniswood, I have to admit.
The Glob, of Hurley Pustulae
looks most of all like you.
The plimp-kneed zilk of Trescoreen
Whom some may july april
Will never gretch the flommits of
Gremlits naar the burbling rill
'Tis time, methinks, to discourse
'pon brassicas and Georges
Legumes and tubers
Pah! wrong scan

Kim - 'Tis time, methinks, to discourse
Irouléguy - 'pon brassicas and Georges
Software - Let's consider legumes too

and sounds of Victor Borge's
*sssssssswish pop*
I like the old tradition
Of rhyme that scans with sense
As for all this modern stuff,
'Twill be banished hence.
I wish I were clairvoyant
For I'd like to foresee
Which witches might be buoyant
And which we'd drown with glee.
I wish I were a hampster
Or a furry hamster too
Or a furry, furry hamster
And hampster coloured too
I wish I wore a witch's watch
Upon my gnarlèd wrist
My timings I would never botch
Appointments never missed
I wish I had a second head
So no need of forked tongue
As such, I've just a second hand
And also a third lung
I wish I were a sewer pipe
A-shifting Mersey trout
My belches, feculently ripe,
Would noxious vapours spout
I wish I were a music box [R,S,R,i] Bizarrely delightful!
So easy to wind up
Thus people would oft take me
For a playful singing pup. - sorry - I posted just to get rid of the darn thing. Not the easiest line to follow, Monsieur Softers, am wondering if you had a final line in mind when you posted?
I wish I weren't an England fan
It's getting somewhat bland
Whether soccer, cricket, rugby
So best stick head in sand.
I wish I were an Irish man
I'd have the name O'Reilly
And cheer the boys at Croker Park
Because I'm really smiley :-)
I want to have a raison d'étre
But sadly can't speak French;
Instead, I'll eat this raisin bread
Je mange, donc je suis wench.
I wish that I could sprachen Deutsch
And read Immanuel Kant
Es wäre gut, and would bear fruit
And like Hitler I would rant
Я не говорю по-русски - that's 'ya nye gavaryou pa russkie' (I don't speak russian)
And have never wanted to
Except when calling up a Huskie
For a bit of how-de-do
I wish I were an isobar
Behind Susan Powell's back
I'd pluck a string on my guitar
Then give her bum a whack
I wish I were a bandicoot
(a bonzer Aussie mammal)
I'd live inside a handy boot
And coat it with enamel moving along...
I wish I were a roundabout
In scenic Swindon Town
I'd be adorned with traffic lights
And make the drivers frown
I wish I'd find a dodo bird
And teach it how to fly
Alas, such thoughts are quite absurd
Can't find one -- wonder why?
I wish I were a traffic cop
I'd stand right in the road
Gesticulating wildly at
Your girlfriend's outsize load
I wish I were a toothbrush
And you were my false teeth
I'd brush up against you gently
In Morningside or Leith
I have no need for silicone
I'm all up-front, you see
My hair and teeth are still my own
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