mc5 - Pea and Honey Recipes

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Pea and Honey Recipes

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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.

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A puddy tat indee...

My cat is called Sylvester

My dog is dubbed Stallone

My hamster is named Rocky

Now please leave me alone

Beware of men with pitchforks

Who stalk princes with big ears

In Gloucestershire they breed them

Quite thick, or so one hears

I wish I were a metaphor

Not just a simile

I'd be on ev'rybody's lips

Somewhat like Jade Goody

I wish I were a fixer

Always in demand

I'd never charge high prices

< cockney>"To you, darlin, a pahnd" </ cockney>

I wish I were a Geordie (Irg) Not a Lonodoner, then?

Then I'd say "Whey aye, man"

I've no idea what it means

But at least I've made it scan!

I wish I were a Brummie

Lugubrious but shrewd

Up here I'm in my oil tot

Because I'm in the nude

(yes, that was a non sequitur, but still...)

I wish I were a Scouser

Resenting my victim status - © B. Johnson 2004

I'd pick a lot of fights

With 'em Mancunians that hate us.

I wish I had two pennies

For to rub together

I'd spend them both on bennies

And disregard the weather

I wish (to be quite honest)

That you would go away

My patience, it is limited

My nerves do tend to fray

I wish I were poetic, like

But my speech is yoofy

I guess I'll stick wiv street talk

So as to sound less goofy

I wish I were a student

I'd sleep the whole day long

It helps me to be prudent

And grow up big and strong. There's sensible, isn't it?

I'm glad I'm not a mothball

That fumigates poor bugs

I'd whiff a bit, of naphthalene

And mask the smell of drugs ...speaking of students

I wish I had sagacity (pen) Could be worse. :-)

Then Jade Goody I would choose

I may not be as fat as she

But I could wear her shoes

I think I'll bog off early

I must avoid the rush lovely student stereotyping guys

Be home in time for Neighbours

Viewed with reverent hush.

Today I'll have a lie-in Tuj] We're just jealous...

A lovely duvet day

I'll get up when I want to

Meanwhile I'll hit the hay

I once saw a spoof e-mail from "Management" that included the following: "Every employee shall be entitled to 104 Duvet Days every year. 52 are called 'Saturday' and the other 52 are called 'Sunday'." Well, it amused me.

I wish I had some old rope

Attached to some foul-smelling soap

Just rotting in my shower

The stench doth overpower. This is not meant to be limerick, boys and girls.

I wish I knew my rhyme schemes [Irouléguy] Real life is much the different

My metres and my feet

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