mc5 - Pea and Honey Recipes

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Pea and Honey Recipes

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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.

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I wish I were an oil can (pen) Well done. Didn't know tha came from t'North, though. :-)

[Rosie] Aye. I still have northern vowels but can almost pass (not parse) myself off as a southerner these days, dontcha know :o)
To stop your squeaky bearing

For you are but a metal man

It's just your Gay Pride earing

I wish I was a Popemobile

Then all Pontifs I would carry

To part the crowds, like Dead Sea swells

And drive blokes who can't marry

I wish I was a painter's brush

Dipped in cobalt blue

I'd apply a background wash

With strokes full bold and true

I wish I were a haystack

With needles all concealed

So if lovers in me tumbled

They'd quickly be revealed.

I wish I had no tonsils

'Cos right now they are sore

They don't do any good, I'm told

I don't need them anymore.

This useless old appendix

Has reached its use-by date

I think that I should trade it in

Before I am too late

I'm tired of eating doughnuts

They go straight to my waste

Enhancing life's one pleasure

Spelling klaxon sounds! Waist not waste, sorry all

There's no account for taste

I'm tired of skinny dipping

It's given me a chill

And all that clothing ripping

Hardly give the girls a thrill

If I were a transistor (Tuj) No problem. I took it as an intentional pun, enabling me to be lavatorial, which is good.

Inside a radio

I'd semiconduct day and night

Forever on the go

I wish I had an aubergine

(Whatever that might be)

Made out of purple plasticene

It's an egg fruit, don't you see.

I wish that Ninja turtles

Were still the height of cool

With shouts of "Cowabunga!" [Software] I always thought an aubergine was a French B&B

From kids going home from school. (Kim) It is, but ladies only.

I wish I were a bowling ball

Heavy, round and black

I'd ram 'em puny bowling pins

Momentum I don't lack. Or is it kinetic energy?

I wish I were a firework

Bright-coloured in the dark

I'd shoot up high into the sky

And try to hit a lark

I wish there was a galaxy

Or, failing that, a Snickers

Which we once called a Marathon

Both as ice cream now for lickers

I wish I were a puppet

I'd come with strings attached

Unless I were the muppet type

With Piggy I'd be matched

I wish I drove a big red bus

A mighty double-decker

I'd pass by every bus stop

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