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Pea and Honey Recipes
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I Eat My Peas With Honey
And tales of derring-do.
Four lines, they can be rhyming
(That's Glow Worms to me and you).
Ending line is as usual.
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This stance is never gainful.
What will be of Halloween?
In 2021?
Will we be extinct by then?
Or have lots of fun?
I have a brand-new T-shirt
With holes slashed here and there
It's the brand new style
And they call it "evening wear".
Whilst visiting old stamping grounds
They all said "Who is this?"
"He's never paid for any rounds"
"He always takes the piss"
What I want for Christmas
Cannot be bought online
The cost of postage on its own
My PayPal would decline
The reindeer is a puzzling beast
With such a red, red, nose
And its nocturnal flights may be
With Santa, I suppose
A monkey with a blue, blue arse
Has one thing on its mind
Lifting lions to the sky
Is not it, you will find
I think this form may have potential.

A tapir with a long, long nose

Sniffs the mountain air
While Delphic oracles propose
He smells a grizzly bear.
The narwhal with its long long tooth
Does the dentist fear
For if it should be taken out
Its narwhal friends may jeer not great, but play seemed to have stalled
The rhino with its mighty horn Shuddup at the back
Stands out among the crowd
And those that would the rhino scorn
– Viagra does them proud
We haven't seen a bird all year
Nor wildcat, pig or mole
The ’pocalypse is surely here
Each horseman played his role
I'm glad I'm not a binbag (Chalky) V good - bit of class.
Stuffed in a smelly bin
I'd rather be a pin tag (Rosie) thank you!
Despite the state I'm in.
I wish I were in Georgia
It's always on my mind
Buddy, can you find a vote?
I'll pay you back in kind.
My people do not like me
My servants even less
My family have disowned me
Hi, I'm Andrew. Did you guess?
I've only thirteen minifridges
To keep my lipstick in True, apparently
And as for cold cream just don't ask
Just warn your next-of-kin
The shortage of new jamjars
Stops me from making jam
And that is not the only thing
I do as little as I can
My colleagues do not like me An intermittent theme, although fictitious
I wonder why that is?
Maybe they are envious
That what is mine is his
My colleagues all adore me! I'm sure this must be true
I'm the apple of their eye
But when I go bananas
I know that it's a lie
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