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The Banter Page
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If you're wanting to get something off your chest, make general comments about the server, or post lonely hearts ads, then this is the place for you.
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Rigt then
No, I meant this is a test. It works!
ooerr
[pen] Well done!
[Rab] That 'whoops' thingy made me jump when I posted earlier. It reminded me of that vaguely guilty feeling when one sees a policeman. It compelled me to re-read my post just in case I'd said something a bit wrong.
[pennylope] Me haven't done freelance writing since ooh ... way back when ... so much respect :-)
[Chalky] Hmm... I wonder if that's a desirable side-effect or not. I'm sure we'll get used to it!
Test message
Speaking of side-effects...sorry about that.
Get well soon Humph. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7360347.stm
Are there people in the Morningverse that actually know Humph or know people who know him? Could we get some kind of collective "get well soon" card in the form of a print-out of a game? It could be send via the Beeb.
Mystery Crescent - lame duck? This never looked like the server for it. Perhaps it should be culled for a good hard game of Stilletto (misspelt) Gerundive?
[Tuj] Patience my boy, patience :-)
(Kim) I used to know his trombonist and arranger, the late Pete Strange, not that that's exactly a connection, but I think your idea, or something similar, is a good one.
RIP Humph. All will miss you, I'm sure.
Irreplacable. A joybringer. To be missed by so many.
Very sad news. He was a wonderful man.
The Oyster Card of Fate has finally met the ticket barrier of Mornington Crescent.
The Humph tribute ISIHAC they had on the radio today is the only programme (radio or TV) that the cat has yet paid any attention to.
Humph
His obit in the Grauniad was written by none other than the late George Melly though it had been updated. It was less of a eulogy than some of the instant stuff we have read in the last few days but there's no doubt Melly thought well of him.
Humph
I propose to close the current Mystery game (it's trudging along anyway) and create a book of condolence for Humph in its place for all to place memories, anecdotes, comments, thoughts etc. I will also mention it in MCiOS and Orange. I suggest leaving it open until, say, Friday and then I will print it off and send it to John Naismith c/o the BBC. Agreement?
Alternatively,
I could just open an extra slot.
Ooh. Not been in for a while and just discovered the "Whoops!" feature. Lovely. The times I've needed that in the past (then again, the times I've only just noticed a typo/grammo when reading a comment years after the event). Nice one, rab.
Humph
Maybe now would be the time to send Kim's suggested "Get Well Soon" card? :)
Never mind, there's already something on Orange.
[Proj] One word at a time between us? ;)
... as I speak
There's a Humph BBC R4 programme currently being broadcast. Wonder if Rosie has caught it. I expect it will be on Listen Live for some weeks.
As the programme ended they said that there will be another Humph tribute, by the ISIHAC panellists, on May 11.
Afternoonpreferablyevenington Crescent
(Chalky) At 9.25 in the morning? You cannot be serious! I'll have a look on Listen Again.
[Roseee] we-e-ell - naturellement, I am aware [after all these years :-)] of your posting pattern time-wise - but I wasn't sure if you did the listen to Radio4 in bed of a morning - dozy off - listen again a bit - dozy off, etc etc.
Nocturnal transmissions
(Chalky) Nah, it would activate the neurons, as it's meant to, and I'd never get back to sleep. Maybe 24-hr rolling news would be better. Man Injured In Factory Accident In Solihull = Instant slumber. :-)
Radio 4 activates neurons? Shurely some mistake!
longweekendering
Morning all. Beans planted. Laundry done. Lawn not yet cut but first I must make progress on the feature I was supposed to finish on Friday. Hoo-rah for Citrix and being able to work from home, dammit.
Technically not a holiday for me today - but I'm skiving off on account that it's our first wedding anniversary. And what a glorious day it is! We spent the night at a nearby castle, had a slap-up meal and a sit in the sunshine. Unfortunately back at home now as we've both got work to do :(
Aren't people silly
I've just read my AOL news headline which says that the Postal Service is "not delivering".
We've just had new, energy-saving Dyson Blade hand driers installed in the lavs. They SUCK the water off your hands. Quite amazing. I wonder if they'll also dry socks?
The father of in[ter]vention
[pen] Flippin' Dyson - always poking his nose into other peoples' business. I actually like having damp hands when exiting the facilities. I also really enjoy changing the bag on my vacuum cleaner - and gain particular satisfaction from vacuuming in a straight line ;-)
Another thing, Mr Dyson - how are you supposed to flip the nozzle up to zhuzh up your lank, post-office (not Post Office) hair when there ain't no flippin' nozzle?
[pen] I was just talking to my son about the Dyson hand driers a couple of days ago. Ages ago I had the offer of a 30 day trial - wish I'd taken it up, but I never got round to it.
[pen] but, but ... it would SUCK your hair up. Not nice. Zhuzh by hand would be my advice.
The Dyson airblade is based on a very narrow, high-speed jet of air. I'm not sure that it does suck, but it certainly blows...very hard. It definitely collects the water blown off the hands, and atomises said water periodically into the atmosphere.
I HATE hand-driers. What a noisy waste of time, space, energy, everything. If your hands are damp wipe 'em on your bum. That's what it's for. Even if you don't do that they'll be dry in less than a minute especially if you rub 'em together briefly.
The most impressive drier I ever saw was in a bar in Dresden. It was called the 'AirWolf' and my (German) friend remarked that it appeared to be based on Rommel's desert air-conditioning system.
Air Dryers
Conventional hot-air dryers actually work and work quickly in Alberta. Something to do with the altitude, I've been told. After a few dryings your hands are like lizard skin though.
Well that one well-and-truly dried up, didn't it? In other news, I've killed ALL the ants that were invading my kitchen. Mwahahahahaha!
Formica topped
(pen) What about the army waiting outside?
[Rosie] Beautiful subject line. I was trying to think up something similar myself ;)
[Tuj] Hear hear. [Rosie] I pouffed permethrin into all the brickwork outside too.
Ant fever
[pen] Thanks for the tip. I'm a-watching and a-waiting.
All Ants on Dec
(pen) Pouffed? I can just see you. Only a lady could get away with that. Don't forget the boiling water down the cracks in the concrete. (Tuj) Cheers.
[Rosie] If not pouffed then what is the verb for the application of a powder to a surface (or into a crack or hole - oh dear, this just gets worse) by air-propulsion, generated by squeezing a slightly flexible plastic bottle? And I tried the boiling water first too :o(
[Chalks] I bought Homebase's own brand, about £3 - very happy. Ant free.
Powder me nose and other parts, possibly
(pen) Yeah, OK, pouffed. But it does make me giggle.
[Rosie] You're not supposed to get it on your skin, so wash those affected parts immediately - you know, the ones that are making you giggle. ;o)
Ant Powder
[pen/Rosie] My family has always used the verb "to foof" (or possibly "fouffe" - the spelling has never been established) for what you do to get ant powder out of the bottle. In fact, the verb often gets repeated to become "I'm just going to foofoofoof that ant-hole."
Fizz ant
Possibly cruel, but quite entertaining is pouring bicarbonate of soda solution down the ants' nest - the whole thing fizzes quite satisfyingly and the poor wee ants themselves sometimes exhibit a certain anal effervescence too.
I have emerged, bloody, bruised but alive, from the end of term marking. How are we all?
Same as ever, ta. Do you have a clubcard?
Ants
There was a bloke on TV the other day who pours molten Aluminium down ant's nests. When it all cools down he digs it up and it looks really neat. A three-dee map of the nest. It also solves the ant problem in no small way. Like the powder, it isn't good for your skin.
Ally castings
(SM) I wonder. The ant's nest would have to be very dry or there'd be an explosion of steam, hot metal and pyrolysed ants. Not nice. Where does he get the aluminium from? He could melt down old saucepans, I suppose, but molten aluminimum is hot, 660°C plus, incipient red heat.
[Tuj] No. As a proud shopper at Auchan, though, I have a "Waaouh" card. Because the savings make me say "Waaouh!". Obviously. Yes.
Price floozies
Our local supermarket advertises something it calls a 'Price Commitment'. Since these signs disappear as soon as the so-promoted product increases in price, one has to wonder to what extent this counts as a commitment.
Changing topic...
[rab] With the "Whoops!" button, could one undo a winning move? More pertinantly, could one test several options until finding the winning move, if unknown?
[Tuj] (i) Yes and no. (ii) I think so, but would it really matter?
[rab] Yes and no, eh? There's cards close to the chest. I'm too timid to go test it ;)
And regarding the second, in theory, with patience, one could knock off the likes of Mystery Crescent single-handedly.
Yes, but you could do the same thing, albeit more publicly, without the Whoops feature. If anyone ever suspects foul play I can always look at the logs.
I've just acquired a niece - what's the appropriate Unclely response? (Other than a brief note of congratulation).
[rab] No idea!
[rab] Go make a visit, if plausible, and be friendly towards. No point in sending gifts at present (lol) as too young to appreciate them.
[rab] A congratulations card. If you want to send a present, something for the parents to enjoy, rather than for the child, is better received in my experience. As Projoy says, the sprog is too young to appreciate anything, and it's the parents who will be feeling more in need of TLC, and perhaps a little neglected.
(should you doubt my credentials to offer advice, btw, I speak as one who was en-neiced earlier this year).
Visit no-go; parents live in New Zealand. Point taken vis a vis gift for them.
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