(Chalky) Do I take it that you are no longer engaged in elegant scribal activity?

I saw this in the letters page of the Grauniad a few days ago. A woman walks into a hairdresser's in Ashington, Northumberland, and says, "I'd like a perm". The hairdresser replies, "Ah wandered luuurnly as a cloud. That's Wordsworth, y'knaa".

[Rosie] Indeed I am - still calligraphing and chalk-scribing and the occasional line drawing. However, I now do lots of freelance work for a research consultancy so find myself embroiled in activity mainly connected with Exhibitions & Shows. September was Computer Games, then the Printing Industry, plus a bit of Royal Agricultural Society work. This month is Motorcycles & Scooters, then Paris [holiday] and then ... Recycling Waste Management. I can hardly wait.

[Chalky] You had dealings with the RASE? You poor bugger.

[Rab]'Has it got a sink?' would be a fairly normal question in my experience as a landlady - my new tenants have just written to ask me what the rules are on hanging picture frames and pets in the house. They seemed like such a lovely couple, but the latter request is really against my principles and sounds as though it could get messy.

[rab] good news about the gaff. Are you still in Embra or have you returned to Mancland?

At least they're asking - unless it's because their cat has just had kittens and they want to keep them all.. ;)

[Ella] I'd get the RSPCA onto them if they're hanging pets on the walls.

.....so the woman says "You don't understand, I want my hair curled." So the hairdressed puts her head in his fridge.

A scottish man walks into a baker's shop and asks "Is that a doughnut or a meringue?" The baker replies: "Naw, yer right enough, it's a doughnut".

[Dunx] That was my concern! Obviously I need to learn how to express myself more clearly through the medium of the written word or alternatively improve my sense of humour!

[Ella] ... or I need to read posts properly before I write. I hadn't woken up yet and just didn't notice your very well-expressed joke.

I'm back in Manc now, having caught up with my new (and, yet, somehow, old) colleagues last night at the annual poster session (which essentially is a front for a booze-up). [Ella] I'll check about the sink - welcome by the way.

[Dunx] I can sympathise! It usually takes me a good few hours before I remember who I am in the morning let alone how to read and write. [Rab] Thank you for this fantastic site. I happened on it whilst searching the web for bedroom furniture (?!) and as you may tell, am now completely hooked. I do feel as though I've gate crashed a party full of old friends though - hope you don't mind!

[Ella]My apologies for being thick about your post.. and I'm not that old!

Hello Ella, welcome! Hope soon you'll feel part of the party!

(Ella) I know what you mean about mornings. Being retired, I have decided to do away with them entirely, but it only postpones the befuddlement. Welcome to the asylum, which is of course run by the inmates. BTW I'm a bloke.

[Ella] Welcome.

[Ella] All old friends were once new friends. Welcome. BTW I'm a spiny anteater from New Guinea.

[Ella] Welcome and .... oops! quick got to go line manager on the loose.

Searching for bedroom furniture . . . it makes a change from "Jade Goody Nude".

No, if she'd wanted Jade Goody Nude she'd have ended up at MC in Outer Space. MC5 is a decent site with none of that filth, despite our best efforts. (Note for the uninitiated: a look at the "Google hits" info on the MCIOS screen reveals a distressing number of people who not only search for Ms Goody as God made her but thereby find their way onto the MCIOS page. No-one knows why.)

Yes, I don't know why Dan doesn't just rename the site.

Breadmaster] Imagine my surprise when I did a google search on "jade goody nude" and searched through for MCiOS, and LO AND BEHOLD, I found that IT WAS YOU that was linked to.......

thanks to all of you for making me spend teh last 30 minutes trying to find a GOOGLEWHACK. But hey - I suceeded !. Never again.

[st d] You recall this of course?

[Ella] Will you be frequenting the other MC sites too?

[St D] Splendid! I knew my crusade (consisting solely of repeating the phrase JADE GOODY NUDE as much as possible) would bear fruit...

[Bm] Do you do it in real life too, then?

[All] Thank you for a very warm welcome! [Darren] I've just spent some considerable time following the links to some of the other sites. Consequently, I've cancelled all appointments I had made with the outside world for the next year in order to give myself at least a slight chance of keeping up with all of the MC banter and games available. Who needs a family/job/friends anyway?

[Chalky] Did you get the mail I sent you (to both addresses) last night?

[rab] YES! *OOPS - TURNS OFf caps lock*
Was 'called out on business' straight from the office which is euphemistically known as 'went to the pub', then crashed [out, not into]. Thanks. Good stuff - am following it up as I type - hence the caps lock. I'm gibbering now. My brain is full up.

[Darren] Naturally. This is one reason why, like Ella, I have no family/job/friends either.

[rab] No birthday cake this year? Oh well, have a good one anyway.

[Lib] I'm saving myself up for a big plate of curry tonight...

[rab] many happy repeats!

Is it just me or is there a bowl of soup on the front page?

I think it's a Rogan Josh.