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One word
Airgun.
Another word
Alkaseltzer.
one word - euthanasia
RSPCA blokey turned up (very handsome aussie surfer type!) and it's wing was indeed broken. He advised that he'd take it to the vet, but it would be put down, because it's just too expensive to keep all the gull chicks they get in. He did say if it had been older and just sprained it's wing they would have kept it until it healed, but broken wings are just too complicated. It was very cute and fluffy up close!
Hummmmmmm
We get hummingbirds in our garden. We have a feeder hanging off the deck, and these bizarre little birdies buzz up to it, flapping their wings like crazy, and suck all the lovely sugar water up. They just don't look real - they're the closest thing to a CGI bird that I can imagine, because they move so suddenly that they seem to travel from place to place by teleportation. And they make this ultrasonic chirping noise.

Weird things.

Apart from that, the only wildlife I usually see close up is dead squirrels on the road. Very colourful, especially if freshly flattened, but hardly pleasant to run past.

Worse than gulls
I REALLY hate pigeons. They are just parasitic, and fat, and nasty. Apologies to any posters here who happen to be pigeons.
Pigeons
In France, so I'm told, pigeon is regarded as a delicacy, particularly amongst foodies, i.e. most of the French, and not to do so is regarded as almost blasphemous. Hence the following Limérique:

Il y avait un jeune homme de Dijon

qui n'avait que peu de religion

Il dit, "quant à moi,

je deteste tous les trois,

Le Père, Le Fils et le pigeon".

Kazoo-ing
[Dunx] Aren't they fantastic! I don't think we have humming birds in this neck of the woods but we do have honeyeaters. They appear to have similar characteristics. Heaven only knows how fast those little wings beat, but they are nearly invisible such is the rapidity. Their spatial control is unbelievable - as you say - one moment they are there and next moment they are gone and probing their long, thin, curved beaks into a flower a foot or so away. Quite magnificent little beasties.
[penelope} That sounds rather idyllic.
[seagulls] I've always liked the little scavengers; I love the sound of them wheeling around the coast. Then again, I've never had to live with them as I've never had the pleasure of living that close to the sea.
[pigeons] The most rapid method of making a new sculpture look old.
Outbreaks of excessive whiteness.
Can you go blind from watching the BBC1 weather forecast at 10:30pm? I almost did last night. The weather lady was wearing a jacket that wasn't just white, it was whiter than white. So white it made me go "argh!" and throw my hands in front of my eyes. Pearing through my fingers I swear that it was so white it was casting shadows. Surely we should be warned prior to the start of the broadcast that sunglasses should be donned before watching the following weather bulletin. BTW, I've no idea what the weather is going to do today, but it doesn't look too bright.
pigeons
Must be an acquired taste. I tried some, but it was much too strong for my palate. The meat's almost chocolate coloured. Give me some nice crispy duck any day! Speaking of which, staying on a boat on the Broads this year, and woke up at 6am to see a duck staring in through the window!
Broads Minded
[Angus] Last time I was on the Broads, it was surprising if a duck wasn't staring through the window!

On a previous visit, I remember the swans were particularly importunate - they'd see people moving around on the boat, and then come and peck on the hull!

Swans
Well that's another matter! I swear one followed us from Norwich down as far as Beccles - and back again! He knew I was a soft touch unfortunately - I'm a sucker for a pretty face...
The Furcation Game
That slow-moving behemothis about to consume my life again... Before I devote all free time to it, is there anyone out there already concocting a move? Speak now or forever hold your peace.
Guessing
[Tuj] Be my guest...
Sacha
I was saddened to hear this morning that Sacha Distel passed away yesterday. To be honest I hadn't realised that he was 71 nor that he had been ill. Whilst not a fan of his (although some of his 'crooning' was enjoyable) I did appreciate some of his guitar work.
celeb-gloat
woohoo - No. 1 in League! And so easily achieved by leaving my paltry sum on BB5's Ahmed, so he ended up serving some purpose after all.
young whipper snapper
congtrats to x_sugarbabe_x and to Chalky in third place. This follows on from Dujon last week; I'll have to crank up moreteaplease (but about to be kneecapped). Monday will be too late to buy into for James Hewitt who according to JJ's Dividends has a potential of £10 per share!! and at only £2.60.
Shell the manipulative tart has schemed on the wedding night and now Victor has left the House, it should have been Jason out tonight *must remember its just a game*
Blushes
Thanks for the recognition, Inkspot. Congrats to those who, after me sitting in No 1 all week, grabbed a big dividend and pushed me down (way, way down) on the table of achievement. Watch out this week, children!     ;-)
*breaks three-day silence in the chat game with a loud fart*
*sprays air freshener*.
Just popped in to say I've been a bit poorly but now I'm better :-)
Oh! are you alright chicken?
Cooped up
[Michelle] I have just pandered to one of my inner demons, by ringing telephone number 09011 21 44 07 and voting for you to be evicted; a peace of mind for 25p. Its time you were released from the Big Brother House.
Indeed
Yip. She has to go.
last day at work..
Yay! I'm going to try to do NO work at all today, if possible.
shoulder to the wheel
[snorgle] Are you going on hols, or off to greener pastures?
Hummingbirds
I had a dream I was a hummingbird once. Most wonderful dream. I must say though that the expression "flapping their wings like crazy" doesn't really sum up the sight and feel of a hummingbird. It implies effort and although I have only seen them once (in carib..) they looked effortless. Beautiful - and I see what you mean about the CGI....
job
I'm starting a new job on Monday, and I'm on strike for the next couple of days. In fact, this morning a member of staff asked if my friend (who sits by me,and is a smoker) had a lighter, and a blokie said he needed it to set fire to the computer room. We laughed, and she gave him a lighter. 15 mins later and the phones went down. Apparently he was an engineer who needed to do something to the wires. I'm not even logged in now, so I don't really care! Yay!
Apologies for cross-posting: I'm off on my hols, so have fun, and I'll catch up with everyone when I get back on 10/08.
Hey UK - have a great time! I'm off in a couple of weeks. Camping. If it rains we'll be playing a lot of 'Carrot'.
campanology
[Btd] Another good one is 'Beers A-to-Z' although I don't expect the girls will be quite up to speed on that. 'Vegetable A-to-Z' might be a good alternative.
Amusing oneself in the rain
I've always found "Rude Bodypart Euphemism A-to-Z" quite entertaining. All together now - "Arse, Boobs, Crack etc. etc."
Re: Hummingbirds
Hummingbird barney, this morning - one hummer was feeding and buzzing the breakfast table, then another one came along and drove the first one away! High pitched squeaky noises aplenty. Then a few minutes later the first one came back. They look to be male and female of the same species, so we're wondering if driving each other away is hummingbird for "Get your coat love, you've pulled."
kacaknet
hoþgeldiniz
kacaknet@mynet.com
hoþgeldiniz
Astonishment
I am astonished that this play has gone unchallenged for so long...
[kacak] SPONG!!!
aha!
I raise you that SPONG!!! and counter with a vehement and thrusting FNOOOOOOOOONGA!!!
Wabam!
poo
KICKING!
more again
Whilst it is a bit quiet in here this Sunday, break out a tinny and bottoms up to Dujon forhanging onto the top of Celebrity Mornington Crescent for a second consecutive week and keeping blamelewis and DrQ at bay.
A novel way to save the NHS...
Whilst meandering around work today i found this memo, and it made me giggle for hours.... ' Dear Colleagues, As you are aware from the letter recently sent to you from xxxx xxxx Director of Nursing, we propose to discharge all patients to Nursing Homes between 10am and 11am each morning.'..... Discharging all patients is certain to solve every bed crisis!
Is that to be the foundation upon which Labour build up to the new ellection?
Followed by the proposal of regular drenchings to aid the fire service, shooting children to bypass education failures, and then arresting everybody in case they commit crime?
Wishes
[Inkspot] Much as I would like to claim consecutive terms of leadership I think you will find that x-sugarbabe-x gave me the proverbial hiding last week. I'm about to be kneecapped so have done sweet nothing. *sinks to the wooden spoon position*
Correction
This week is 'this week' last week was 'last week'. So, yes (gloats), creamed you lot 'last week' but x-sugarbabe-x (aka Chalky) still gave us all a lesson the previous term.
Sorry I spoke.
Hogging the game
I just heard one of the funniest things that I have heard in my many years as a radio amateur. A gentleman (south of Canada and north of Mexico) whose country of origin shall remain secret was just talking to a local Australian 'ham' and was trying to work out the time difference; he was quite sure that Australia was twenty seven hours ahead of his own time zone.
Shhh
[Dujon] Everyone's asleep.
[Dujon] Excellent stuff! I'm off to a country in the region indicated tomorrow so I hope to return with many amusing tales of foolishness. Almost certainly mine, but there you go.
[Breadmaster] Have a safe trip, sir. I wasn't having a go at American citizens, I talk to many such. As it was latish night at his place at the time I suspect he'd had a hard day and was simply tired - or something. It was still funny though.
chicken licken boiled
[Dujon] You are right, about x-sugarbabe-x. I was slghtly behind with my compiling and jumped a week.

Big Brother; Stu evicted !!! like whoaa, dude! ...that's like .... seriously amaaaazing.

Badgers - out of their misery
It may just be the summer season, but I was surprised that never really got going. I would start a nasty game of Acre Street, as I read that archive recently and oddly felt compelled... But we've got The Furcation Game already, and that needs a good jump start too. As soon as I get a bit of time on my hands why is this the sort of thing I want to waste it on?
And yes
...that was a non sequitur 'cause I'm not a Big Brother fan and I'm too lazy to go Celebdaqing more than half-heartedly!
No Pruning Shears Here
[Tuj] Re: choice of time wasting - because it's fun? I know that's why I keep coming back.
Has there been a game of MC played entirely in Haiku form?
[Boolbar] Not entirely sure, although I once did have a Lock Cup qualifying match against Catherine where all *comments* were to be made in Haiku form, but the move was not included in this (as according to the standard format of separating move from comment, as practiced on PantsMC).
Psycho Haiku
During my last move for The Furcation Move, Furcation O was a new haiku variation. The initial letters of the haiku formed the first line of a new haiku, so "The old writings read / In there ev'ry ancient hai / And its ku under", as well as being a (slightly odd) haiku, forms the first line "To write a haiku" with it's first letters. I can't remember quite why I came up with it, though it does remind of some very difficult limerick game we had once at !York...
Fractal Haiku
It would be very impressive if the new haiku so formed also had the property that its first letters formed the first line of another haiku. And so on.

But shall we play the
game of Mornington Crescent
in haiku form first?

waves goodbye*
See yas all in September :-)
come n sign my guest book pretty please........
Weird commnets will get extra kudos in the next sphere of life or a free cup of tea on Edgware Rd!!! http://www.papalazarus.com/page4.html
cheerios
[Chalky] Have a good hols, this could be the chance I need to get back on top of Celebrity MC *looks down at diary and curses, holiday to France imminent*. Would anyone be able to send me the Friday league web pages for 20 and 27 August? A link will follow tomorrow, but in the meantime congrats to gil (sigmundfreud).
more me again
Barging in with the link as promised, and now back to Kingdom Hospital.
three in a bed
I would normally avoid Haiku. If I break the rules of the format, tap me on the shoulder.
[Inkspot] Surely you mean...

I avoid Haikus.
If I break the format's rules,
tap on my shoulder.

And there you have the same sentiment but in the right number of lines and syllables (5-7-5)...

one or two
It is the syllables I have the problem with. Normally with each player contributing a single line, errors can jar. But by doing all three lines this will be good practice. When I wrote the second line I agonised over Amer-sham and Am-er-sham, coming down on the former, influneced by the move earlier by Dunx where to me I sounded 8 but was accepted as 7
With(1) West(2) Ruis(-?)lip(3/4); puts(4/5) me(5/6) in(6/7) spoon(7/8)
I have invited critisism of my play as my da-dee-da-dee-da seems to be a bit la la at times, but I do intend to nail this format; hopefully before the game ends ;)
As some of you know I enjoy football. This little gem appeared on the official web site of the club I follow:

"In excess of 19,000 season tickets have been sold as ******** gear up for their fourth consecutive season in the top flight, which is more than at the same stage last season."

Is this stating the bleeding obvious or am I misreading it?

Sneaking back in...
Just back from a very enjoyable week in North Wales. I'll have to go tidy up my badgers that are still roaming the tunnels...
[Inkspot] Ruislip is TWO syllables, Amersham is THREE. Unless you're going by some definition of "syllable" of which the rest of us are unaware.
19,000 season tickets
Dujon] I read that about four times, but now I get it! The clause beginning 'which' is a bit ambiguous, I suppose.
Celebdaq
[Inkspot] Looking at the 'daq today, it seems that I now have the facility to add members to Celebrity MC. Would you (or anyone else, for that matter) have any objections if I add in my other two personas?
whiching...
[Dujon, Tuj] I read it first time as I think it was intended... but I reckon the problem is that the 'which' is too far removed from the subject to which it refers... so it looks like it refers to the fourth season, but in fact it refers to the 19,000 season tickets.
more!
[Uncle Korky]Please add them to the League, we need to do something about the recent run of good luck by Dujon, you could even be onto a winner with Doris this week. According to JJ's Projected Dividends it will be close between Nadia and Sven on the divi's payout.
En route
[Inkspot] Stand by for appearances by Mavic_Chen and Johnny_McDozenlegs!
Syllabarial Variations
[Inkspot] It might be a pronunciation thing: "Ruislip" is pronounced "rye slip" rather than "roo-ey slip"; "Amersham" is always "Am-er-sham".
seven eighths
So the line does have eight syllable thingys With(1) West(2) Rui(3)slip(4); puts(5) me(6) in(7) spoon(8) and yes fair cop on Amersham, from such a low base, I can only but improve....moving swiftly along; [Uncle Korky]I love the names Mavic_Chen and Johnny_McDozenlegs ;P
They should be with us tomorrow.
Apology
[Inkspot] You're quite right. Sorry.

[Haikuen] Apparently I can't count syllables at all.

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Want to play? Online Crescenteering lives on at Discord