[Dujon] If it's late by the time I get home from work then it is always a pleasure to find that between my pockets and my wife's purse we can scrape enough pound coins together to raid the local chippy. [age and fancies] I've always found the most attractive women are around the same age as me, so in thirty years time I'll be gazing whistfully at OAPs.

. . . Oh, and I might have learnt to spell by then. Have a free 'h' on me!

[Duj & Bool] 'Tis remarkable that food - whether it be the eating of, the cooking of, the shopping together for, or the spontaneous 'grab a takeaway because we can't be arsed to cook' type, just has to be one of the most joyously satisfactory elements of being in a meaningful relationship.
As for age differences ... my late husband was a couple of years older than me; my erstwhile partner was 18 years older ; my current partner is 8 years younger. No discernible pattern. Apart from the fact that they were/are all Librans and of Celtic persuasion.
[Blob] wisdom - so it's true what they say then? We only ever regret the things that we DON'T do. Hmm ... glad I got stuck in then ... :-)

BTW my little pearl of wisdom above was mostly a wistful glance back to our youth. I'm happily married and two out of the other three in the aforementioned quartet are in long-term relationships. So the advice is really directed at the Young¹ Free² & Single³ amongst you.

¹ Young at heart.
² Or any price really.
³ Or as your conscience allows !

Thank you Blob for that pearl of wisdom. I shall bow to my elders and betters on this occasion and head to Battersea tonight to watch Germany Vs Czech with my colleague Miguel from Portugal, who has revealed to me that his strategy for watching EURO 2004 matches is find a punb where there will be as many of the nationality actually playing. So tonight I am hoping for lots of German or Czech girls. I don't seem to have had much luck recently, and this I put down to a couple of factors
a. I seem to predominatly go out to the pub next to work, so hang out with work colleagues, many of whom are female, which lessens the chances of being in a position to chat someone up/be chatted up.
b. weekends I have been going home to see my mum (and until recently, dad). Again....
c. Most of my friends seem to be either married or in relationships or FREEZE up around girls.
d. No-one seems to help out really. By this I mean that if I have a single male friend and a single female friend that meet I will stir it a bit to see if anything happens - sometimes it does. No-one seems to do this back.
e. I am fat, ugly, loud, irritating and have lousy personal hygiene.

Oh dear - there DO seem to be far too many singletons in the Morniverse ... *dons cupid wings*

Consolations of the single life:

• The TV remote is where you put it.
• If you have not finished the marmalade, there is still some marmalade left.
• You go to films because you want to see them.
• If you burn a meal, you just get a takeaway instead.

[Raak] Point 4 works for couples as well, unless the words "Can you just keep an eye on . . ." were uttered prior to the burning.

[Raak] And Point 3 applies only as a benefit if the marmalade is still in good condition. If it is old and clinging to the sides of the jar as only the last desperate dregs of marmalade can, and you are reluictant to buy fresh, new marmalade until the old one is finished, then having someone finish the marmalade for you is a good excuse to go out and buy a new one. Does anyone want to come over and finish off my marmalade?

[pen] You only go and see films when your marmalade is in good condition?

Oh, I'm back from a wee break in Wales, btw, off to Cornwall on Friday...

[pen] Ah, what a romantic come-on...

I second that. A woman who invites you round for marmalade is clearly far more kinky than a woman who invites you round for coffee. I never get invited round for any marmalade. Either nobody finds me appealing, or I've never met a woman with a toaster. Either way, it's a crap life really, and I feel certain that I shall spent it lonely, unloved, and cursed with a rumbling stomach.

In addition I personally don't believe any of this twaddle about advantages to being single. If there were any, people wouldn't go on the pull and get paired off. There are of course advantages to not sticking your head in a blender, which is why very few people go and try the alternative, but not having a partner/spouse? I find it impossible to believe there are advantages to such a cursed life...with one notable exception. As a single man with no woman in my life, I can proudly say that NO ONE within the four walls of my flat has ever uttered the words "Leonardo" and "Di Caprio" in the same sentence. It is for this reason that I can also proudly say that within the four walls of my flat No ONE has ever been murdered and had her body dumped the rubbish tip less than a mile from these premises. How many married men can say that? Not many.