Well, Penelope, UK, Boolbar et al, that actually sounds reasonable. Essentially any ground floor accommodation would be suitable, and it's only for a weekend(?), so I'm sure it shouldn't be difficult. At risk of asking for too much, I could do with a wee smidgen of assistance during the stay if anyone is willing to volunteer a hand - perhaps a workload shared between two or three? When I say "workload" incidently, I'm referring to little more than pushing me across that gravel, cutting up some of whatever meals we order and helping to slip on/remove socks and shoes. Are their any kind souls here who might be willing to chip in a bit? I'd be most grateful.

Oh, and st d, falling asleep drunk in my wheelchair is - ahem - not unprecedented.

Jonathan, They mistake you for Mrs Ellis, eh? Interesting, but when you get your regular correspondence from Mrs Trellis of North Wales(as we all do of course), for whom does she mistake you? She addresses me as "Ms. Fernandez" - the wheelchair user who was in Eldorado and The Office.

ZK - hearstoppingly beautiful, eh? Raaaowwwr. Stop it with your wicked alluring imagery or I think I'll start to experience 'Charlotte Greene' syndrome. Rosie and I both fancied her for years with no idea what she looked like. Ha!

And last but not least, Hey, there, Chalky. I've really missed you a great deal. I do hope you're well. I didn't forget you BTW. You got a personalised greeting in my opening post, but I think it may have slipped orf the page by the time you got here t'other day. How are you, anyway? Long time no hear.

And with that, I shall depart for the moment, and no doubt be back shortly. Addidas!

*Sneaks out of page singing "Voodoo Lady" By Creme Brullée*

[Thrax] Willing to offer any of that kind of help, if I'm there, which I'm fully expecting to be.

That's very kind of you folks. Perhaps a little nearer the time, we'll chat a wee bit about things just for clarity. You can email me at anthraxhirl@freakout.freeserve.co.uk Indeed I'm happy for anyone here to email me for badinage as you see fit, upon whatever subject you like. Except "Reality TV". *Shudder*

Now that my intrigue as to the extent of ZK's beauty has been satisfied (does one satisfy an intrigue ? in fact is that even th eright word ? mmm. Anyway. Now I am intrigued as to exactly why mr Thrax is in a wheelchair, and also why he needs someone to cut up everybody's meals. Is that just a personal OCD you have ?

LOL! Yes, st d, I have a very rare medical condition that means I can't stand the sight of everybody's meals not cut up before we all dine together. Ha. It's a rare psychological disorder, but I can't cope with anyone tucking in before everybody's orders have been not merely brought to table, but properly disected and divided up into segregated components(sometimes even quantified and noted down on a clipboard for archiving). I got so frustrated by this once, that I endeavoured to take matters in hand one evening at a dinner party, and lunged towards a butler, with a knife and fork, as he emerged from the kitchen with two plates of Duck A L'Orange. Thinking himself in great danger, the man dropped the two dishes, pulled a gun and shot me in the abdomen. Ever since, I've been confined to a wheelchair and someone has to "cut up everybody's meals", as you acutely observed, on my behalf.

I trust I've satisfied your intrigue on that matter too. *winks

Good lord, the girl in the wheelchair in The Office was the one from Eldorado? I remember seeing her on an Esther Rantzen programme a while ago (that I happened to flick into in the middle of, honest, really yeronna) in a piece about critics. She was talking about how the critics were unfair to Eldorado. The funny thing is that they had the art critic Brian Sewell on too, and she hated him. I have never seen anything like it. He was asked something like, "So what do you think of artists personally?" and he replied in his typical manner, "Oh, I just want to stamp on them like cockroaches." And she went completely nuclear - "How can you say that about human beings! How can you say that!" He just sat there twiddling his glasses with a taken-aback expression. It was lucky she was in a wheelchair really or she might have gone and decked him. Two people who simply didn't gel, I felt. But nice to see that Nessa's rages weren't entirely simulated...

Actually, I was at school with the girl in question. I used to have lunch with her everyday, believe it or not. Hmmm, I'm not sure who should be more ashamed though, BM - Julie for being this Nessa to whom you referred in a God-awful soap about British Ex-Pats living in Costa Del Tawdry, or you for admitting to watching Esther Rantzen. Heh. I guess we'll call it a nil-nil draw, shall we, my friend? LOL!

Oooh, I've just had a thought. Anyone up for a game of Go Johnny Go Go Go Go? I'm itching to try it out here on this server. What do you think? I take it you've all seen the famous LoG sketch?

We often play said game here in the hospital..........LoG, gods amongst men!!

[Thrax] I'm not familiar with the game myself, but there are a number of game openings at Orange MC since today is the annual Orange Festival of Crescent.

[rab] Apologies for unwarranted trumpet blowing.

Nice one, widey. Glad to hear I'm not alone around here in my appreciation of the League. Er, for the benefit of those of you who aren't familiar with the game - such as your good self, Dunx - Go Johnny Go Go Go Go is a card game that three of the characters play one evening in the Royston Vasey hosipital, St. Mary of Bethlehem. Essentially, it seems that two of the fellas have made it up on the spot - "it's a cross between Hoover and Eight Men Down" - with over-complex and nonsensical rules. They then explain them at breakneck speed to the third character, impressing upon him, "you'll pick up the rest as we play."

In essence, the game is not that dissimilar to MC, and could therefore be played on a website such as this. Instead of our moves being train stations, they could be cards, like "Seven of Clubs", "King of Diamonds", "Ace in the Hole" etc. with appropriate comments about 'scoring' and 'tactics' etc. just like how we play MC. The winning move, instead of "Mornington Crescent", could be "Go Johnny Go Go Go Go".

I could set up such a game, with a heading containing the explanation of rules(to be largely ignored, though not contradicted. Anyone up for it?

As a final thought, if you haven't seen the sketch, I strongly recomend checking out The League of Gentlemen. It's one of the best programmes I've seen in a LOOOONG time. The card game features in Season 2, and also in the DVD Live at Drury Lane, where they, like Python before them, perform some of their sketches before an audience.

So, anyone care to join me for a hand of Go Johnny Go Go Go Go? You'll pick it up as we play...

I don't know if that's a sunspot just above 3 o'clock, or just a speck on the film. I have about twenty more pictures, but they all look like this one. :-)

(Raak) Excellent pic. Not sure about the "sunspot". I don't remember seeing any when I projected the image with a small telescope. I used to be a keen observational amateur astronomer myself but not these days, but I'm one the few amateurs to know something about celestial dynamics (orbits, perturbations, 3-body problems etc). It's a guaranteed conversation-stopper.

LoG great series, this site has many wav files including That's a Go Johnny Go Go Go Go

Nice one, Raak. *still jealous*

[flerdle] Griz (he's a bit sleepy at this time of the year) asked me to pass on his best regards to wallaby and also the hope that wallaby's transition is not some sort of permanent state.

wallaby was fine last time I checked, and sends his good wishes to Griz. She says that Griz probably needs some glasses, or a nice long snooze.

[Thrax] I am in the presence of celebrity, albeit at second remove! I offer according respect. If you ever see her again, tell her that I am not ashamed to say that I thoroughly enjoyed Eldorado. Well, not very ashamed.
[Raak] I'm sure you know that sunspots generally appear only around the solar equator and tend to come in groups, like a line of bubbles... which is pretty much what they are.

[BM/Thrax] I quite like Eldorado too, if truth be told. I detest all other soaps, however. I still play the Eldorado theme to myself sometimes, when I am alone with keyboard or guitar.

Nice pic, Raak. Very grrovy.

Yes, well, I did find her on Friends Reunited a couple of years ago, Breadmaster, and wrote to her, but I can't recall whether or not I got a reply. Hey ho.

I never watched it myself, Darren, except for a few minutes here and there, which were enough to put me right off, I'm afraid.

So, who here watcheds the Football? Sacré Bleu!! A defeat snatched from the jaws of victory if ever I saw one.

Well what *do* you expect from a manager who substitutes our best player (Rooney) with the proven international failure Emile Heskey? Whose inept challenge gave away the free kick from which the equaliser was scored...

[ZK] Are you really a Zoo Keeper ? If so, what type of animal keepeth thou ? Little fluffy ones ? Scaly slippery ones ? Big bold smelly ones ? Please do tell. And at which zoo ?
On the other hand, if you aren't really a Zoo Keeper, then I'd guess with a moniker like that you must be a teacher !

[Blob] Student. :) The name itself derives from an episode of The Goon Show I have on tape.
Greenslade: "A flannelled fool approaches the penguin pool."
Neddy: "Aaah, good morning, zooological keeper!"

[Thrax, JLE] I'm just so gutted because we were actually playing decent football for once - every other match I've ever watched, I've been sitting cringing at our defence. And who'd really take it out on James? You could if you were feeling bitter but I'm more inclined to point the finger at Heskey and Gerrard (and then, possibly, James) Whoever was brought on for Owen though, fair enough - I thought he was particularly unspectacular. Of course, if Beckham hadn't missed the penalty, the French mightn't have suddenly summoned up the confidence to win, but, hey, there you go. *thinks* Next match, I'm getting the Doritos in. Then we'll win...I knew ordinary crisps wouldn't do the trick...

[ZK] Thanks for clarifying that - so, a student zoo keeper then.
[Re England/France] I think it's a little unfair to say "if Beckham hadn't missed the penalty" - he didn't miss exactly; his attempt was saved. To me a miss is when the goaly doesn't have to bother coz. the ball's gone over the net/round the side/backwards/vertically either up or down, or deflated on the penalty-takers toecap.

... panalty taker's toecap.

(Third time lucky)
... penalty taker's toecap.

Hey! We won the 3rd Test [against NZ]. That makes me very happy :-)

And we came second in the Le Mans 24 Hours race at the weekend - a bit more of a success than coming second in the footie (or the rugby....).

I was elated by the cricket, shame the footie took the edge off it... Still, in some ways they were similar, very close with England just holding the edge, just one stayed with us and one spectacularly went pear-shaped.
Credit to both teams for doing well against decent / very good opposition, and to the cricketers for not only getting the whitewash but for an excellently entertaining series. Oh, and the chance to hear Blowers cut off halfway through relaying the match situation to talk about buses.

[Blob] Indeed. I retract my insensitive interpretation of the English language.

Changed the words slightly, but you get the gist of what I'm getting at!!!

I think it was something like this I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour, but heaven knows I'm miserable now and being as how I had to watch the game in france I bloody well am!!!!!

[Tuj] It was a great test series, capped off by the Mark Richardson v Ashley Giles epic sprint. I like the home series because BBC Radio 4 LW webcasts the match -- I can listen to all of the pigeons and Weapons of Cake Consumption while I'm at work. ;)