I think I'll just repeat what I said in the chat:
You have two teams of wizards. In order to make a move you must change shape into a creature or thing that beats, defeats or otherwise trumps whatever the other side has just changed into. So you might get a sequence like
Wizards: Elephant
Witches: Mouse
Wizards: Cat
Witches: Dog
Wizards: B - A - T - H
Witches: Telephone
at which point I have to admit I'm stumped so presumably the witches win that round.
Green
American Automobile Association
Puce
[CdM] You should have gone for Laziness. Laziness beats aardvark any day.
The M25
Green
The Petronas Towers
Olive Drab
(changing to a more interestingly named color team)
Burj Dubai
Goldenrod
The International Space Station Am I doing this right?
Gainsboro
Asteroid Maybe we should go back to puce and green!
Peach Puff
Lembit Opik Just wanted to play my joker
Green
Baroness Scott of Needham Market (Forced. Possibly.)
Olive Drab
Harriet Harman
Olive Drab
An Oompa Loompa with a grievance
Green
High-powered corporate lawyers
Puce
Tagon's Toughs (who have a standing bounty authorizing any member of the unit to shoot Partnership Collective lawyer drones on sight.)
Puce
Ha! Thought that might fox you! Round one to the Puces!
Let's start the next round with … a handbag.
Green
Damn. I think he won right there. Nicely played!
Malta
Puce
[CdM] I think so too.
Yalta
Azure
Defence budget cuts
Goldenrod
A Dossier. No, you can't read the contents.
A freedom of information act
aqua
A politically biased judge
white
A Murdoch media slu... campaign.
green
A fish and chip shop
oops. A misapplication of the "whoops" button there.
Azure
A public health campaign
Goldenrod
(Switching team allegiance, to keep silliness levels below an acceptable threshold) A botched knee operation
Goldenrod
[rab] I picked Goldenrod because of the connection with "The Witch of the Westmorelands". I think azure is confusing. I was expecting it to be a deep blue, a preconception left over from a dabbling in heraldry some years ago.
Olive
A large compensation payment
Goldenrod
Lawyer's Fees Pro Bono: To be in agreement with the lead singer of U2
Backhoes. Fibre-optic cable has only one natural predator; the bucket-shovel excavator, or backhoe.
Azure
A Potato. The natural enemy of all petrol driven vehicles.
green
A fish and chip shop
aqua
Mercury contamination
Goldenrod
The Government of Japan
Goldenrod
Nick Parks in a New York taxi
Green
Rosa Parks in a Montgomery Bus
aqua
I declare a victory for all.
Shakespeare
goldenrod
Stallone? Too obscure for me.
Green
The California Budget Deficit
goldenrod
A written response to the opposition
Olive
More investment in education
Goldenrod
High-speed, Cyclic Storm Systems
Goldenrod
Flatulent Fresians
[juxt] How does it differentiate odours?
[Simons Mith] With great difficulty.
BurlyWood
Grizzly Béarnaise
Green
A fish and chip shop
aqua
A Health & Safety Inspector
Green
Coca-cola and a slice of lime
[Just a thought] If Coca-cola "beats" Single Malt, this iteration of the game has no winning move. I'm not much of a drinker and I loathe scotch, but I can't make a case for Coke beats Glen Invercockileekie other than in the most narrow circumstances.
[SM] I was thinking much the same thing myself. Perhaps we should give this round to the Azure team?
[SM^2] No, I think you missed my point. Coca-cola and lime defeats single malt by being mixed with it.
[CdM] Ah. But that introduces another quandry, namely: is the next move supposed to beat "Coca Cola and a slice of lime" or "Single Malt mixed with Coca Cola and a slice of lime"?
[SM} Presumably the wizard that had previously taken the form of single malt now has to change into something else, so it is just the Coca-cola + lime that needs to be defeated,
Puce
All right then, rum and coca cola.
*Bewildered* With, or without, a slice of lime?:/
Lime
A ten-tonne lime come on, draw a line under it!
Goldenrod
A bit of stripey canvas nailed to four wooden stakes.
Green
Lead piping in the kitchen
Goldenrod
An embedded hyperlink
aqua
Your nephew, who despite being only eight knows more about computers than you ever will
Azure
Napalm - It's the only language they understand.
aqua
The cold vacuum of space
Green
The total perspective vortex
Puce
Ace Rimmer. What a guy.
Olive
Victory for Simons Mith I feel.
Puce
Thank you. I was quite pleased with that one.
Marmite
Puce
The invincibility of the ten-tonne lime is something that surprises me, but I haven't thought of a satisfactory counter. Time to award this one to Tuj … and put the game into storage ready for next time.
Audience
*shouts, screams, generally goes wild for Simons Mith*
Puce
… An eleven tonne lime. Dammit, l'esprit d'escalier rides again.
aqua
All I could think of was Lyme disease.
Lime
A million gallons of G&T? But that'd just be getting silly, eh?
goldenrod
I'm a tad rusty in my French. I translate l'esprit d'escalier as "the phantom staircase". This is obviously a cunning metaphor for something to do with eleven tonne limes (or perhaps twenty-one tonnes of limes), but the meaning escapes me.
L'esprit d'escalier
It's an idiom for thinking of some witty retort just after the last moment.
#66FFCC
Isn't it "the spirit of the staircase?"
Puce
Let's start a new one. An eleven tonne lime
An industrial lime-squeezer
Blue
A hell of a lot of Mojito Mix
Blue
President Franklin Roosevelt
#66FFCC
The Saudi Monarchy
This is the end of the line. There is no more.